Broken Dawn
by Narasen
Summary: What if Rosalie had refused to help Bella when she called from Isle Esme? This alternate version of Breaking Dawn will include non-canon pairings and a character death.
1. Chapter 1 Over My Pile of Ashes

**Bella POV**

"Rosalie?" I whispered. "It's Bella. Please. You have to help me."

_"Help you? I tried to help you, and you've disregarded my advice. You're a lost cause, Bella."_

I took a deep breath... I knew that trying to convince Rosalie to look past her disapproval of my choices was going to be difficult; I only hoped that this time, I would be making a choice she approved of.

"Rosalie," I sobbed, my voice breaking with grief. "I'm pregnant and I'm scared and Edward is going to kill the baby if I don't find a way to stop him. You're the only person who can help me."

The feral snarl was so loud that I jumped, almost dropping the tiny cell phone as I gasped and felt my face heat up.

_"Pregnant?! How is that possible? How _dare_ you come to me for assistance? Do you honestly think that I would _help_ you get the one thing that _I_ have always wanted?"_ she hissed.

The line abruptly went dead.

**Emmett POV**

I was on my way back from hunting when I heard it... Rose having a first-class freak-out. I closed my eyes and shook my head, steeling myself for whatever I was going to find. I mean, I'm a big dude, but Rose is _scary_ when she's pissed. I'm not afraid to admit it; the woman kinda makes me nervous when she gets on a good rampage. Remembering all of my shit that she'd smashed over the years made me run a little faster. I might not have any parlor-trick mind talents going on like some of the others, but I definitely have a major Damage Control skill. Living with Rose, you have to adapt, man. It's like survival of the fittest or something.

When I cleared the river and sprinted into the house, I was prepared for, I don't know, trivial Rose shit. I'm not saying that she's a drama queen or anything; I'm just saying that it doesn't take much to set her off. I was _so_ not prepared for what I walked into.

Alice was all bunched up in the floor, her little forehead resting on her knees with her arms wrapped around her legs. Jazz was kneeling beside her, trying to send out some calming vibes, but I guess he was having to suck up too much of the other stuff going on in the room to really get the job done. Esme's face was all crumpled up, crying as much as a vampire can cry, holding on to Carlisle with both hands. Carlisle was just... I don't know. I've never seen Carlisle like that. He was all concerned about something, and he looked like even his patience was wearing thin, trying to reason with Rose. And Carlisle has some _serious_ patience.

"Babe, what's going on?" I flipped my diffusing-a-Rose-situation switch, putting my arms around her. "What's got the most beautiful girl in the world all worked up?"

"Don't _start_ that shit with me right now, Emmett! Bella's _pregnant._"

Her mouth twisted up like the word tasted bad, and I knew right then that there was going to be no reasoning with Rosalie. _Fuck._

"Okay, well, I know that's bound to upset you, babe. We'll just go up to Denali for a while--wait, Bella's _what?!"_

"She's pregnant, Emmett. I didn't know to warn them," Carlisle whispered. He looked...haunted or something. Majorly guilty.

"Well, what does that mean? Like, _Edward_ knocked her up, pregnant?" I have to admit, for a second there I was thinking that maybe my new little sister was using that keeping-Edward-out-of-her-head thing to her advantage. It would be hard to blame her; I could hear how much Eddie was working her up when she stayed here, then getting too scared to finish the job. Girls have needs, man. Especially human ones, with all those hormones and shit.

"How does that happen? I mean, if there was any way to reproduce, Rose would have figured it out by now." Totally not the right thing to say. Rose went all apeshit.

"Because she's _human_, Emmett. She _ovulates._ Her body can _change_. Obviously you _men_ still have the ability to spawn, but nobody knew that because most of us aren't such gluttons for punishment that we'd even have enough interest in a goddamned _human_ to give it a shot! She's pregnant, and Edward is being his overprotective, dramatic self; so scared that he's hurt his _precious Bella_ that he's insisting on Carlisle performing an emergency abortion. She called me, Emmett! Called me and asked me to _help!_ Help her do the one thing I can't do, just so she can have another thing that I can't! She's just doing this because she wants to throw it in my face that I don't have the ability! Bella didn't want children! She signed up for this, knowing it wasn't an option. Now that she knows it is, she's determined to keep it, even though it'll probably kill her."

"_Rosalie!_ She's not doing this to throw anything in your face! Everything in the world is not about _you,_ you self absorbed bi-" I cut Alice off at the pass, right there.

"Whoa, Alice. Rose is just upset. No need for name calling, here." I tightened my hold on Rose, just in case she decided to spring. She's unpredictable, like that. Besides, she'd have to be if she wanted the chance to make a move on Alice. "Babe, Bella's not like that. She wouldn't try to hurt you on purpose. She probably thinks that you'd be the only one willing to help her, what with you wanting kids and not being all clouded with...well, love for her. I mean, she knows that you don't like her. She probably thinks that you'd run with the chance to hear the patter of little feet around here."

She narrowed her eyes at me, giving me the "fuck-you" look. Man, I was just digging myself a deeper hole every time I opened my mouth. So much for my "ability" to smooth Rose over.

"I. Am. Not. Helping. Her. I'll hold her down myself while Carlisle performs the procedure. I will not sit here and watch this happen. I don't care what she wants or how safe it may or may not be. Over my pile of ashes will Bella Swan have a child."

Now, Carlisle is always telling us that a profound change is completely altering for us, since we don't change very often. Well, hardly ever. I never really thought about it, because I've been mostly content with things since I woke up from the bear attack. I never _wanted_ anything to change. But right there, in that minute, something did change. I looked at this beautiful creature in my arms, that I had loved past any kind of reason for damn near a hundred years, and felt disgust. I mean, sure, we've had our fights, but I never took them too seriously. Mostly, they were just a different kind of foreplay, you know? But right then, it was all different. I couldn't understand her; Bella was so sweet, so trusting. That girl just marched into a family full of vampires and made herself right at home, trusting us and believing that we wouldn't hurt her. Even after Jasper damn near killed her, she still loved us all. Even Rose, no matter how shitty she treated her; Bella loved her. Now she was in this situation, and all she wanted was for us to keep her safe from her own husband for a little while. And Rose was willing to just fuck her over because she was jealous.

I took a step back from her, looking down into her perfect face and trying to go back to the way I felt a few minutes before. I didn't _want_ this to happen. I didn't know any other kind of existence. But right then, that didn't matter. Rose was fucking up, and I couldn't deal with it.

"Carlisle, what's the problem here? I mean, yeah, it might be dangerous. But we don't know that, right? It could all work out okay, couldn't it?"

Everybody was so quiet it was creepy, except for Rosalie, hissing and looking at me like I'd grown another eye. I ignored her for the first time since she found me in the mountains, and turned to look at Carlisle. Before he could answer, Alice's tiny little head snapped up and she looked _fierce._

"I can't _see_ her, Emmett! Ever since she decided to keep the... fetus. She just blurred right out of sight. So there's no way to know what's going to happen. I _love_ her, Emmett. We can't just sit here and let her die because none of us knew to be prepared for this!"

"Alice is right. Edward's vampire nature is an unknown variable here. There is no way of knowing how much of those traits may have been passed on. The only thing that we know right now is that Bella's pregnancy is progressing very, very rapidly. When she returns home, I will examine her. I am trying to reserve judgment until I've seen her, but at the moment, I must say that I agree with Edward. However, I will not do anything against Bella's will."

"Bella's tough, Carlisle. She's survived way scarier things than a baby for the last couple of years. Sure, we've helped her through it, but she's held up pretty well. I don't have a problem with helping her live through something else. So, the kid is dangerous. So what? We'll check it out, see what's going on after you do your doctor thing, and we'll wait. If things get hairy, we know that we could always change her. It's not like Edward wasn't planning to do it soon anyway."

I looked at Rosalie after I finished my little speech, and it felt like I was looking across the Grand goddamned Canyon or something between us. I have to tell you, it scared the shit out of me to realize that, for the first time ever, we weren't on the same page. Shit, we weren't even in the same _library._

**Carlisle POV**

I looked into the face of my son, and saw his childlike determination and faith in Bella's strength. I wanted so much for him to be right, for this situation to be so easily resolved. At the same time, I saw the chasm he had placed between his mate and himself. Knowing their natures as well as I did, I feared for his marriage. Rosalie was so stubborn, and she held such irreparable grudges against anyone who dared to cross her. Until this moment, Emmett had always been unflappable, humoring her whims and following her lead. With his decision to support Bella in this one thing that was such a sensitive subject for Rosalie, I knew that she would never fully forgive him. At the same time, it seemed almost as if there was a visible change in Emmett as well. He was looking at Rosalie in a way that I had never seen him look at anyone; realization mingled with disgust on his boyish face. In that moment, I feared for my family.


	2. Chapter 2 An Unlikely Alliance

**Bella POV**

I was quiet through our return trip, not trusting myself to speak without sobbing. Occasionally Edward would give me a searching look, but I closed my eyes or looked out the window at the clouds beneath us in the dark. I was afraid that, if I met his eyes, I would see the man that wanted to take my pretty baby from me, not the man that I had married with absolute trust less than three weeks before.

In my mind, I tried to formulate a few contingency plans. Obviously, I hoped that Edward could be convinced of my safety after the examination that Carlisle was sure to give me when we got back to Forks. But what if he wasn't? With all that I knew of Carlisle, I was sure that he would refuse to do anything without my consent, but a small part of me knew that there was very little he would not do for Edward. If he pleaded and demanded enough, Carlisle might give in. In that case, who could I turn to stop two of the strongest beings I'd ever encountered? Rosalie had already made her opinion exceedingly clear, and Emmett was sure to go along with her decision. I thought that Esme might intercede on my behalf, but she was as powerless against Edward's manic energy as Carlisle. Alice was just as stubborn about my safety and things that might potentially jeopardize it as Edward; I was sure that she would be in favor of the _procedure_ that Edward insisted upon. That only left Jasper, who I was sure would send me waves of acceptance and calm while they tore my little nudger out of me.

Who else was strong enough to protect us?

Jacob. I knew he would be wild with grief and revulsion; maybe even wild enough to side once again with his former allies. As much as it would pain him to be in agreement with the "bloodsuckers," the fact that I was pregnant with Edward's child might be enough to push him over the edge. Then again, when confronted with one thing that Edward was bent on taking from me, Jacob might have seen the chance to make his biggest play yet in his never-ending quest to separate me from Edward.

There was no one that I could put my full faith in. Charlie, perhaps... But he was no match against all of the preternaturally strong beings that surrounded me. Even if he were, how would I explain the incredible speed that was accompanying my progressing pregnancy? No, not even Charlie. Besides, being separated from my vampires was a terrible risk; if this pregnancy was as dangerous as Edward and Carlisle seemed to believe, there was a very good chance that I would not survive it without their venom.

Edward gave me another imploring stare as I let out a heavy sigh. I pressed my forehead to the cool glass of the window.

There was no one left to turn to.

**Edward POV**

I raged at myself for the entirety of the journey back to Forks. When I had prepared myself for the inevitability of a physical relationship with Bella, this was one thing that I had never factored in. _What had I done?_ I had always known that my presence in Bella's life was a dangerous one; but I had never imagined that I could create this unholy mess.

I watched her face, trying to read her expressions. She kept her eyes closed, mostly; whether from exhaustion, illness, or a refusal to look at me, I could not ascertain. She did not pull away when I touched her, but neither did she lean in to my caresses the way she always had before. Wild with fear, I wanted to beg her to speak to me, but I did not know what to say.

As I stroked her small hand, she pressed her forehead against the window and sighed. For a moment, the expression on her face reminded me of the one she had when I turned to walk away from her after her disastrous birthday party; like the memories that Jacob Black had flung at me in front of the high school. Bella looked bereft, and the sound of that sigh devastated me.

**Bella POV**

When the plane landed at SeaTac, we were greeted by Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper. I couldn't help breathing a sigh of relief when I saw that Rosalie wasn't among them; almost as much as I feared Carlisle's prognosis, I had feared her wrath. How could I have been so stupid? To approach _Rosalie _for assistance? The one person in my family who had never accepted me was sure to hate me after what I had done. I looked up at Edward to see if he registered that she wasn't there; as far as I knew, he didn't know that I had called her yet. Something must have upset him, because he stiffened and grimaced like something was burning him.

As we approached, Emmett's eyes shifted from mine to Edward's. After another long look at me, with shock apparent on his face, my favorite big brother stepped toward me with his thick arms outstretched.

"Oh, Bella. Don't be scared; I've got you."

I fell into his arms, sobbing with relief. The biggest, strongest vampire in the world was on my side.

"Dude, what did you say to her?" He looked at Edward, with hurt and anger in his eyes. "Look at her, Edward! She's _terrified_ of you!"

"No, Emmett. I..." I trailed off, not sure how to finish the thought. I _was_ scared of Edward. Rather, I was afraid that he would make this decision with out me, leaving me unable to defend myself or my baby. I looked at the floor, trying to collect myself. When I looked up at the faces of my family, I wanted to cry all over again. Carlisle looked truly regretful, while Esme reached for me, blatantly afraid. I ran the few steps between us, and felt her strong, cold arms wrap around me to keep me from falling. As she murmured soothing words into my hair, Emmett stepped between us and Edward, making Edward look even more distraught. Alice's face was pinched in a way that I had never seen before, even in moments of irritation. Was she so angry at me that she couldn't speak?

"Yes, Emmett," he spoke in a dejected voice. "She is afraid of me. Once again, I have put her life in danger and, true to form, she is refusing to acknowledge it. She is pregnant with my...child. It's not allowing her to eat, and is growing at an incredible rate. She is afraid that I'm going to strap her to a table and force Carlisle to perform an abortion." His voice broke on the last word, and the guilt I felt overwhelmed me.

"No, Edward. I know you wouldn't force me to...do that. I'm just afraid. Please, Carlisle, can we go home? I want to know what we're up against, here." I tried to sound brave, but I was secretly relieved when I saw that Emmett was steering us toward his Jeep. Knowing that my biggest, strongest brother was with me calmed me, slightly.

As Edward helped me into the seat, I grabbed his hand and pulled it to my lips.

"It's all going to be okay, Edward. You'll see. Carlisle is going to check me out and say that everything is coming along fine, just a little quicker than normal. Hey, I bet every woman wishes she could skip through pregnancy at warp speed." My weak attempt at a joke made the corners of his mouth turn up slightly, but it was nowhere near the crooked smile that I loved so much. I was hoping that, as long as I was brave, he would take me seriously and allow me to make this decision for myself. I was already completely and totally in love with my child; if he forced me to choose between them, I was afraid to think of who I would have to choose.

**Emmett POV**

We were all standing around at the SeaTac arrivals gate, waiting for Edward and Bella's plane to land. Well, all of us but Rosalie. She'd locked herself in our room after my little speech, refusing to speak to anyone. I wasn't sure how I was going to deal with that, but since I had more pressing matters at hand, I decided to focus on it later. Also, I didn't need to be thinking about things too much or making any serious decisions. With Alice seeing the damn future and Edward rummaging around in my head when he got back, I didn't need to add any friction to an already fucked up situation.

The thing is, I'm pretty sure that my family thinks that I'm dumb. Sure, they love me. I'm funny and I'm usually in a good mood, so I know they like having me around. But since I don't sit around reading philosophy and having an existential crisis, they think I'm pretty shallow. I kind of like it that way, to tell the truth. I'm pretty good at keeping them out of my head; I make sure that I let enough slide through for them to not suspect that I'm up to anything serious. It comes in handy when I want to play a good prank, and as long as I make sure to give myself away more often than not, they'll probably always think that the few I pull off are because I haven't perfected my blocking technique. It looks spotty, you know? Like it's half dumb luck and half shoddy planning. It's just easier, I guess. I never thought that I would need to keep them out of my head over something like this, though. Something that actually _mattered._

Like this deal with Rosalie. Man, I didn't need Alice seeing us having problems or Edward hearing that I had my little epiphany in the dining room. How do you explain that the irreversible change that usually comes with meeting your mate _can_ actually be reversed? Maybe it's because I didn't have that vampire-meeting-his-mate-and-changing-so-much-he-can't-go-back moment. I was still human when I met Rose. Sure, I was halfway to bear kibble at the moment, but I was still alive, you know? And when I woke up, there she was. This super-hot girl was almost like part of the package... Hey, now I'm crazy strong, fast as hell, immortal, and I have a ridiculously hot girlfriend. Package deal. But when I was standing there, hearing her talk shit about Bella for no good reason, I just snapped. I guess it's been a long time coming; there was never any real tension in my relationship with Rosalie until Bella came along, but it had been getting pretty rough the last year or so. At first, I tried to just ignore her attitude and go with the flow, but it became apparent pretty damned quick that Rose was just _not _going to back down, or get off my ass about getting close to the kid.

See, I've always had a soft spot for Bella. She's definitely one in a million... First of all, the girl is _hilarious._ If she's not tripping over something, she's turning purple because somebody pokes fun at her. She's got this awesome brave streak, too. Misguided and weak, but brave. You never know when she's going to jump off a cliff, or punch one of those La Push pups in the face...she's kinda tough, in a half-pint human girl sort of way. I can see why Edward is always trying to look out for her; she's pretty little and vulnerable, and she definitely doesn't back down from the horrible shit that's always chasing her like she should... But I never understood why he doesn't give her more credit. She can hold her own, you know? Tough, like I said.

I'm not pretending that what she was trying to do wasn't dumb. It probably could actually kill her, if we didn't keep a close enough eye on her. But Carlisle is seriously the best doctor in the world. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that he could save her, if something went wrong. Even if he couldn't, though...this was _so_ not our decision to make. This one was all Bella. Sure, I would be crazy if she didn't make it, but I'm wasn't gonna want to look at her for the next hundred years if we didn't let her figure it out on her own. That's the kind of shit that makes somebody hate people. Besides, I've seen what the whole no kids thing does to a woman. Obviously, it makes them fucking mean. Case in point, my cruel-ass wife.

So yeah, I thought she would come through it fine. Or at least that we'd be able to fix it in a serious hurry if it looked like things started going south. I was just going to keep my mouth shut about it, though, until after Carlisle looked her over. Why show my hand all at once, right? Because there was a chance that he might do his exam, see that it was all good, and we'd all live happily ever after without me having to open my mouth about it.

Then I saw Bella's face.

The last time I had seen her, she was all glowing and pretty at the wedding. They took off to Isle Esme, looking like they were finally going to get down to business and everything would be great. She kept giving Edward these cute little googly-eyes, acting like he was some sort of god or something. It was all real sweet. Like a fairytale and shit. So when I saw her at the airport, I was shocked.

She wouldn't even look at Edward for a second. She was watching her feet, mostly. Course, I can't blame her on that one. Being in a delicate condition and all, falling on her face at the arrivals gate couldn't help things any. So she looked up at us finally, and I could see her relief when she figured out Rose wasn't with us. That pissed me off at Rose all over again. Why did she have to be such a bitch? I mean, Jasper almost fucking drained her dry once, it didn't take Bella long to get over that; so it's a shame that she should be so afraid of Rosalie. Anyway, she finally looked up at Edward, and when he looked back down at her, I thought she was going to fall apart. Literally, the girl looked scared shitless. And for all of my keeping-my-mouth-shut-till-I-knew-what-was-going-to-be-necessary policy, I walked right up and scooped her up.

The kid just started bawling. My shirt was all full of tears, and her little face was scorching hot. I just felt terrible for her. Here she was, for the first time looking like she didn't trust the Cullens. Even though she probably should have had that reaction all along, it sucked to see her feel that way after all we'd been through together. I wanted to punch Edward in the mouth.

**Esme POV**

_Oh, Bella._ She looked so small and frightened, walking towards us in the airport. For the first time since she'd come into his life, Bella looked at my son with fear. Almost as soon as my mind registered that fact, Emmett was stepping forward to take her in his arms.

I could not be angry at Edward for frightening her; I knew that he was horrified that she should be afraid of him. I also knew that the fear consuming him was enough to cloud his judgment, to make him desperate. He only wanted to protect her, to keep the child they had created from harming her.

Still, I understood the anguish in Bella's eyes. I had known the pain of losing a child, known what it meant to be so lost without your child that you would wish for death. I did not want this fate for my youngest, newest daughter. She had completed our family in so many ways; not just by providing Edward with a mate, but by bringing out a bit of our lost humanity in us all.

As Emmett berated Edward, I reached for her and folded her in my arms, promising her that we would make the best out of the situation, that we would take care of her. Her hitching breath and hot face pained me, reminding me of just how strong a mother's love could be. For better or worse, our Bella _was_ a mother, now. If we allowed Edward to persuade Carlisle to perform the abortion, even with Bella's consent, there would be no changing her back into the young, innocent girl she was before. If we did not, there was a very good chance that she would not survive at all. An integral part of our family now, the end of Bella's life would surely spell the end of it.

_I can not allow this to happen. We must save her, somehow. The child as well._

Perhaps it was my unshakable faith in my husband that made me so sure of our ability to keep her safe. Perhaps it was only the empathy I felt, remembering my own tiny, dead son. As Emmett placed himself between Edward and the two of us, I felt a rush of relief. With Emmett and Carlisle on our side, we were sure to prevail.

I was grateful to see that Emmett was insistent upon driving Bella home. Knowing that Edward would not let her out of his sight, I was assured a moment to speak with my husband, and with Alice. Bella would need Alice more than ever, if Edward were to be set against her until the birth of the child.

"Carlisle?" He flicked his eyes towards me, still too overwhelmed with his thoughts to speak, so I continued. "I believe that we can see this through, darling. I agree with Emmett. Bella is strong, and we can protect her. Perhaps the only way that we can save her will be to change her, but as he said, it was an inevitability. Bella is determined to protect her child; the mothering instinct has been spurred in her, and to take away her child would be a very grave mistake. Because she is so selfless, there is a slight chance that she could be swayed in order to protect those she loves from the pain of her loss, but she would never forgive any of us after it was done. Conversely, because of that same selflessness, there is a very _strong _chance that she will be utterly unconcerned with her own health. Women quite frequently choose to die so that their children might live. Instead of focusing our energy on convincing her to end the pregnancy, I think it best for us to focus on watching her very closely and helping her survive the birth. "

"Yes," Carlisle answered, "I do agree with you about Bella's strength and determination to survive the birth in some form or another. The best that we could hope for in trying to convince her to terminate the pregnancy is just a slight moment of indecision, of reluctance to hurt Edward. I fear that she is in very serious danger, especially because of the insistence of Kaure that the mortal mothers of vampire-hybrids never survive. However, with my knowledge of vampire and human physiology, I am trying to maintain a bit of optimism, at least until I am able to examine her. I would like ascertain how quickly her pregnancy is progressing, among other things. Once I have completed the tests, I will at least have a better knowledge of what sort of child Bella is carrying."

"Alice?" I turned in my seat to look at her, seeing that her face still had the strained expression. "I know that you can't see Bella's future, but can you see Edward's?"

"I can, but it's not reliable. He's sure of the course he is on; he will not be dissuaded. He seems to be convinced that Bella will forgive him, so..."

It felt as if my still, hard heart sank.

My son would not be dissuaded, she'd said.

I had seen the determination on Emmett's face, and feared that he would not be dissuaded either.


	3. Chapter 3 Dividing Lines

_Chapter 3: Dividing Lines_

**Carlisle POV**

I frowned at the monitor, discouraged by the lack of information it was providing me. Knowing that it was an exercise in futility, I moved the ultrasound wand over another area of Bella's slightly but undeniably distended abdomen.

_Edward, I'm trying, but the ultrasound isn't working. The only thing that I know to do now is to attempt an amniocentesis. I have a suspicion that it will not be successful either, but I would feel more comfortable if I at least attempted it. I know that Bella has a distaste for needles... Is there a way that you can explain this to her that might make it a bit more bearable?_

"Bella, love. Carlisle can't get an accurate ultrasound. He's going to need to take some amniotic fluid. The procedure is routinely done during normal pregnancies, and is nothing that will damage you or the fetus. Do you think you will be able to bear it?"

"Of course, Edward. I know what an amnio is, and that Carlisle wouldn't hurt us. Whatever the baby needs to be safe, and taken care of."

Bella's trust in me was plain, as was her wavering trust in him. I tried to shove the thought from my mind as quickly as possible; if Edward heard, he did not acknowledge it.

"Bella?" Emmett's voice boomed from just outside the door. He'd agreed to stand outside to give us some privacy, but he and Bella had very vocally insisted that he stay as close as possible.

"I'm okay, Em. Carlisle is going to stab me with needles, but he says it's safe." She smiled weakly at her frail joke, and Emmett snickered outside. Edward's face was still, betraying no emotion at all.

"Bella, you might want to look away now. The needle is very large and intimidating, but I promise to be gentle and make it as painless as possible." I inserted the needle very carefully into her abdomen, hoping to avoid the fetus, since I could not use the ultrasound image to guide me away from it. The needle slid cleanly into her muscle and thin fat layer, stopping abruptly when I reached the uterus.

"It appears that the membrane surrounding the fetus is of a material similar to that of our skin. It is impenetrable. I can't take amniotic fluid, because I can't puncture the amniotic sac. Should you still choose to proceed, Bella, I can not make any guarantees about your safety, or that of the fetus you are carrying. Genetically, I can't even give you a guess as to how many of your human traits will be passed on, and how many of Edwards vampiric ones. Are you sure that you still want to continue?"

Bella bit down on her lower lip, nodding frantically as her eyes filled with tears.

"Of course, Carlisle. He can't help that you can't see him...That doesn't mean he's dangerous."

"I will not force you to do anything against your will, nor will I try to convince you to do anything you don't feel comfortable with. I only want to be sure that you are fully apprised of the risks. I promise you that we will watch over you, and do our best to make sure that you are safe, but we are not infallible. Should you become so ill, or so weak, that your heart fails, there will be nothing any of us can do. Vampire venom will not repair your body if your heart is not beating to circulate it."

The tears in her eyes spilled over as she nodded again.

"I understand," she whispered. "I will keep my heart beating," she promised in a stronger voice.

"No."

Edward's voice sounded comparatively rough, but his face was still unmoving.

"Bella, I will not allow you to take these risks with your life. You can't do this. I'm so sorry, love. I hate myself for doing this to you. This should not be a choice that you are forced to make, and your judgment is obviously clouded. I insist that you let Carlisle take care of this."

Bella's face flooded with color, this time in anger.

"No! My judgment is not _clouded!_ Yours is! You think that you're a monster, with no soul, but I don't believe that. _All_ of you have souls, and my baby is not a monster either. You're not touching him!"

In a gesture of frustration that I recognized all to well, Edward grasped the bridge of his nose between his thumb and middle finger, exhaling audibly.

"Fine. Carlisle, you've said that you will not do anything against her will, and I respect that. I will, however, ask you to step outside and send Jasper up to calm her down. I will sedate her, and I will do it myself. I hold two separate degrees in medicine. I'm capable of performing the procedure."

As I stepped toward my son to reason with him, Bella began to scream.

"Emmett! Emmett! Help me!"

Before she got through the second syllable of his name, Emmett was between Edward and the examination table where Bella was struggling to pull herself upright. In a defensive crouch, he let out a low, menacing growl.

"Get away from her, dude. Really, I'm not playing around with you here. I don't want it to go down like this, but she said she wanted to go through with it, bro. It's not your decision to make, so _back the __**fuck**__ up._ Now."

**Edward POV**

I was surprised by Bella's shouting, and it distracted me enough to allow Emmett to step between us.

"You would stand between us, Emmett? You intend to guard Bella from her _husband_? I am trying to save her! You all seem content to sit here and watch her die, and I will not be so reckless with her life!"

_It's not like that, Edward. She wants to do this, and she won't ever be the same if you stop her. Do you want her to end up like Rosalie? Look at how bitter, how cruel she is because she can't have kids, and she was never even pregnant, for Christ's sake! _

"No, she won't be like that! We'll figure something out. She can have children, if she wants them. I don't care if she has _puppies_. Just not this thing that is killing her! Please, get out of my way and let me keep my wife alive!"

No, Bella would not become as bitter or resentful as Rosalie. I would make sure that she was taken care of, after this godforsaken mess was cleaned up. I looked to Carlisle for support, but Esme stepped between us.

_Edward, stop._

She began to show me flashes of her dim, human memories. _ Caressing her round stomach as she felt the child within her stir. The triumphant moment of his birth, looking down into his face and counting his fingers with joy in her eyes. Holding him as his breathing became labored, and finally stopped altogether. _ Her anguish made me cringe, and then the last moment, _standing on the cliff_. In my mind, her face became Bella's, jumping off of the cliff in La Push.

_She might not become bitter, like Rose. Perhaps she will only ache like I do. Or perhaps she will never forgive you. Trust Carlisle. We will protect her, Edward. All of us._

I cried out against the onslaught of memories and pain, and sprinted out of the room and down the stairs, then out the front door and toward the forest. Just like when I first met her, and I was determined not to kill her, I intended to run until I saw the lights of Seattle. To escape the misery of my desperate mother, and my dying wife.

_Edward, stay where you are. I'm coming!_ Alice's voice trilled. I stopped in a clearing, and uprooted a small tree with the force of my anger.

"If you're finished destroying the trees, don't you think it's time that we spoke?"

"What is there to say, Alice? Are you here to intercede for her as well? To tell me that I have no right to make a decision for her, to protect her from her own misguided affections and instincts?"

"You can't protect her from her misguided instincts, or she wouldn't be lying in a house full of vampires with tubes and needles everywhere, pregnant with a half-vampire baby that might tear her to pieces from the inside out. That ship has sailed. Bella's bad instincts are the reason that she is here now, the reason that she's with you, and the reason that she trusts us all so completely. Bella doesn't retreat from the things that threaten her; she never has."

"But this, Alice! How could I have done this to her? Now my brother stands between us, helping her to commit suicide!"

"You didn't know, Edward. None of us knew. Emmett understands her determination right now, maybe better than anyone else in the family. He has seen the repercussions of a childless existence for a woman committed to her child for more than half a century. Did you ever think that perhaps he is protecting you from the sort of misery that he has experienced at Rosalie's hands?"

With the mention of Rosalie's name, Alice went stiff and her eyes went blank. Then she turned and ran back for the house, and all I could make out in her thoughts was a picture of Rosalie in Denali, and Alice's mental voice whispering _no._ I followed her back to the house, but I didn't run like I had before. Like a condemned man trudging to the gallows, I was desperately wishing to avoid what awaited me when I returned.

**Rosalie POV**

I stood in my bedroom, seething. I've always liked that word..._seethe._ There's something sensual about the way my eyes narrow when I say it, the way that my upper lip curls slightly. I am utterly devastating when I _seethe._

Because of my heightened senses, I could hear the sounds of my family moving below, taking care of the human and her idiocy. I knew that the ultrasound had proven useless and the amniocentesis impossible, that Carlisle's examination had been in vain. He knew nothing more than he did before he started. The baby was still a mystery to everyone.

For a moment, I allowed myself to imagine the imperceptible weight of a small, sleeping body. The scent of talcum powder and baby shampoo. I sighed, and then the vision shifted to something closer to the truth: a combination of the two most irritating beings on the planet. I realized that the human had most likely called me because she thought that we would have some sort of sisterly-bonding over the child, and a moment of solidarity. Perhaps she even thought that I would be so consumed with the idea of a child, that I wouldn't care whose it was. The implication that I was a child-starved, "any baby will do" sort of woman irked me, and I snorted in derision. I had no interest in the spawn of those two creatures. I wanted a baby of my own. One with my golden curls and Emmett's dimples and joyful demeanor...

_Emmett._ Traitor! I was completely bewildered by his immediate and determined affection for that frail, accident-prone human. Like everyone else in my misguided family, he had fallen under the spell of the graceless, eternally martyred Bella Swan from the beginning, but to know that he was standing guard outside of Carlisle's office, ready to tear anyone who got too close in to small pieces was enough to make me tremble with rage. I would make him suffer for this, somehow...but I couldn't think clearly in that house, consumed as I was with anger.

_"Emmett! Emmett! Help me!"_

The rough but still ear-splittingly shrill voice of that damnable human echoed through the house. Screaming for _my_ husband, who was practically brawling with his own brother to protect her! I realized, just in time, that it was not safe for me to be in the house with her, or that baby she was carrying. The thin film of red slipped over my eyes, and I could barely contain myself. I had to get out of there...

With that thought, my plan fell into place. I would leave. I would go to Denali until this whole mess was cleaned up. When Emmett came for me, we would leave together and live on our own for a while. I had no interest in watching my family grieve for the human, and even less interest in looking at the child she would inevitably die to bear. Hopefully she would be rotting away quietly in her grave soon; Emmett would be filled with guilt at his hand in her death, and miserable without me. I smiled a bit when I imagined our reunion.

**Jasper POV**

I was overwhelmed by all of the emotions swirling through the house. Bella was speaking to Edward with a kind of anger I'd never heard from her, then she burst into tears. I listened as Emmett comforted her, and made his way downstairs with her. Above me, I could hear Rosalie pacing and snarling, sending waves of rage and jealousy through the floor that were almost tangible. Then I heard the air being displaced as she sprinted through the house, and out the back door, leaving it open in her wake.

Suddenly, Alice was beside me, her perfect little face pinched with worry and confusion. I looked down at her, thinking about how she was proof of my absolution and far more than I could ever deserve. The love I felt for her was like nothing else in my world.

"What's wrong, Alice?" I murmured, pressing my lips into the her dark hair.

"It's Rosalie. She's gone. She went to Denali, thinking that Emmett would follow her after Bella dies." She flinched at the idea of the death of her best friend, so I tightened my arms around her. "She's not coming back. She wants to live apart from us, with Emmett."

"They've lived apart from us before, darlin'. They always come back."

Her black eyes widened, emphasizing her words. "They're not coming back, because Emmett isn't going to go after her. Ever."

**Emmett POV**

I felt bad for getting in Edward's face like I did, but there was nothing else I could do about it. Bella was screaming for me, sounding like she was going to pass out, and Edward was going on about his medical degrees and forced abortions...It was a tense moment in the Cullen house, lemme tell ya. So I just did what I do best. I intimidated and cussed at him until he ran away. Okay, maybe I didn't just intimidate him into giving up. I was thinking at him really loud, though. Trying to show him what life was like with Rosalie sometimes, when she got upset about the kid thing. Then Esme came in the room, all maternal and sweet like Esme is. I don't know what she was thinking at him, but he turned tail and cut out pretty quick. About that time, I looked down at Bella, and she was having some kind of hysterical fit. I don't know a lot about pregnancy or anything, but I know that it couldn't be good to be that upset, so I just wrapped her up in my arms and carried her downstairs, then I sat down on the couch with her still in my arms. The whole time, she's just bawling. Big, loud sobs and snot and everything. When Esme handed her a handkerchief and she looked like she was settling down a little bit, I heard Alice talking to Jasper in the kitchen.

I don't know if it's because I was worrying about Bella and not paying close enough attention to what was going on in my head, or what. But when I heard her say that Rosalie was headed up to Tanya's place, waiting for Bella to die and for me to go back to her like a kicked dog, all I could think was _fuck that. I'm not going._ Which means that Alice saw my decision not to go, Edward probably heard her seeing me not going, and now my whole family was going to know that the world's first vampire divorce was in the works.

"Please take your hands off of my wife, _brother._"

I looked up, and Edward had this "oh really?" look on his face. Made me want to punch him for the millionth time. I was taking care of his hysterical, _pregnant _wife, and he was looking at me like I was trying to put the moves on her or something! Jesus!

"Edward!" Esme sort of yelled. She's got that mom voice _down._ "Apologize to your brother, and to your wife. You've frightened her nearly to death with your talk of forcing her to have an abortion, and Emmett is only trying to comfort her. Look at how she's shaking! Look at the fear in her eyes!"

"Esme, no...I'm not afraid of Edward." She was trying to straighten up, so I helped her. Maybe I helped her too fast, because her eyes kinda unfocused and she wobbled a little. She sort of shook her head, like she was trying to clear it, and looked over at Edward. "I'm not afraid of you. I'm not afraid of the man that I married, at least. I know that you're scared for me, and you think that something is going to happen to me. You have to understand that I have made a decision, and I will not be changing my mind. I've let you make a lot of decisions for me in the past, because I knew you were trying to do what was best for me. You've kept me from my best friend by disabling my truck, you've bribed Alice to hold me hostage, and I have mostly gone along with want you wanted. I need you to understand something here, because I'm only going to say it to you one more time. _I am keeping this baby._"


	4. Chapter 4 Reckoning

_Chapter 4: Reckoning_

**Emmett POV**

I had to hand it to Bella. She might have been little and human, but she definitely meant business. Edward looked like he'd gotten a good hold on Kate and she'd shocked his ass off or something, and Bella was _not_ backing down.

"Bella, love. Try to be reasonable. You are in terrible, terrible danger. If you don't allow us to take care of this situation, you will die."

Edward was looking down at Bella with this patronizing kind of face, and I have to admit, I was a little curious to see how she was going to react. She started pushing herself up, like she wanted to stand up and just couldn't get her footing, so I put her on her feet and held her steady until I knew she wasn't gonna keel over or something...Then I just sat back to watch the show.

Let me tell ya, Bella Cullen did _not_ disappoint. Maybe it was the pregnancy thing, or hormones; I don't know. She sure wasn't acting like the meek Bella that I knew, that usually bent to Eddie's demands and let him make the decisions. She was turning red and shaking; tearing up, too. But she didn't look like she was gearing up for another cry, more like she was just so pissed off it made her eyes water or something.

"Stop speaking to me like I'm a child! You always treat me like I'm too young or too stupid to know what's going on! Of course I'm in danger! When have I _not_ been in danger since I moved to Forks? Back off, Edward!"

She sort of flopped back on the couch then, with her head in her hands like she didn't know what to do. Esme was rubbing her back and looking at Edward like he was an ass. Which he was, you know, so I wasn't arguing with her on it. I just sort of shrugged, and picked up the remote. I figured, the best thing I could do was to find a ballgame and act as normal as possible in the interest of holding on to what little bit of a poker face I had left, you feel me? My thoughts were all over the place, and I was starting to struggle with keeping it under Douchebag's radar. I needed a nice tree-smashing grizzly-hunting session, but I didn't think it was a good idea to leave Bella. I mean, I knew she had Esme there, and Carlisle; I knew they wouldn't let anything happen to her. But I knew that Edward was pretty fucking determined to get that baby out somehow or another, and I wasn't sure where Alice and Jasper were standing on the issue. If they were on his side, then my leaving would give Team Fuckwad the advantage. So I just stayed put, watching some ESPN highlights and keeping my mouth shut.

Edward didn't seem to have the same idea about keeping a shut trap. He was pacing around the house, bitching about how we were all helping Bella with her suicide mission (he kept calling it that, too. Maybe he thought that saying the word "suicide" to a bunch of immortals would make it stand out more or something) and how we should consider her safety a higher priority than humoring a biological urge. At that point, it got pretty easy to keep him out of my head, because I just kept thinking, _blah blah blah._ I mean, really. Who needs to hear all of that shit?

**Bella POV**

After Edward insisted that Carlisle step aside while he performed the abortion, everything was a blur. I started screaming, then Emmett was standing there between us. I couldn't even see around him to Edward's face, but I could hear the hurt and the betrayal in his voice. It made me sick with guilt to know that I was driving a wedge between my husband and his favorite brother, but I truly had not expected to have Emmett's help at all. To know that he was on my side was a heady thing, not something to be easily discounted. As selfish as it was, I was just too grateful to have his support to question it.

After a one-sided conversation with Esme, in which she did all of the "talking," Edward was gone. I could hear the faint sound of the door slamming below us, and I knew that he had left the house. I didn't know where he was going or when he would return, and the knowledge that he had left me again was crushing. I couldn't hold back the panic that was choking me; I just screamed and cried it out, hoping that he would come back soon with a clearer head and less determined to kill our child. I vaguely registered the fact that I was in someone's arms, flying down the stairs. Since those arms felt like tree trunks wrapped around me, I knew that it was Emmett.

_I'm safe with Emmett he won't let anything hurt me but I have to calm down can't be good for the baby got to get it together..._ My thoughts were a mostly-incoherent jumble, but I knew that I had stumbled over a little bit of truth. I _did_ have to get it together; this sort of violent emotion had to be dangerous during pregnancy. I was marveling at the handkerchief in my hand, wondering where I got it and trying to take deep breaths when I heard Edward's voice.

"Please take your hands off of my wife, _brother."_

I didn't like the way that he emphasized "brother," like Emmett was betraying him by defending us. Apparently, Esme didn't approve either, because she was chastising him before I could even catch my breath.

"Edward! Apologize to your brother, and to your wife. You've frightened her nearly to death with your talk of forcing her to have an abortion, and Emmett is only trying to comfort her. Look at how she's shaking! Look at the fear in her eyes!"

The look on Edward's face when she pointed out how badly he was scaring me was enough to remind me of how foolish we were both being. This was my husband, my Edward. Surely we could figure this out, if I stopped screaming and he stopped trying to strap me to examination tables.

"Esme, no... I'm not afraid of Edward." As I spoke, I realized that I was still leaning on Emmett's gargantuan torso, and his weight on the other side of the cushion we were sharing made the end I was sitting on rise to a precarious point. Struggling to get myself upright, I felt something hit my back just a bit more abruptly than was comfortable, and I was suddenly half a foot away from where I'd started, sitting up straight. The sudden movement made me dizzy, and the dizziness made me recall the nausea that was sure to follow, so I swallowed hard and shook my head. While making my way through my speech, I started remembering all of the times that Edward had made a decision for me, without consulting me. Every time that he took the choice completely out of my hands, or outright forbade me to do something. I knew that my voice was rising with each successive word, but I couldn't help myself.

When I finished, every thought I'd had about maintaining civility and trying to have a calm discussion flew right out the window. He was giving me that condescending look; the one that meant that I didn't know what I was talking about and needed to be protected from my own idiocy and poor judgment. In that moment, I couldn't understand for the life of me why he didn't want to have a child. Obviously, he relished the father-figure role.

**Alice POV**

I sat on my bed with my head in Jasper's lap. As he stroked my hair, I closed my eyes and looked for Bella.

It wasn't that I couldn't find her, it was just that I couldn't see her clearly. She was flickering and jumping in and out of focus like the flame of a candle in a breeze. Guttering, fading, but never quite going out. I had to strain to keep her in my line of "sight," and it made my head ache with the tension.

"What are you thinking, darlin'?" Jasper's sweet, southern-gentleman charm had never faded, perhaps because he knew how it melted my heart. The occasional dropped "G" and his faint slur were comforting reminders that some things were permanent, even if my best friend's tenuous hold on her life was not.

"I don't know," I said. "Obviously, we can't stand by and let her die, but my conscience won't allow me to agree with Edward. The only path that I can see clearly is the one that follows Edward's determination, and that vision is terrifying, Jazz. She _hates_ us. She hates me for standing by without defending her choices, she hates Edward for controlling them...I can't stand the thought of her hating me."

"But you can't see what will happen if she manages to keep Edward from forcing her hand?" His voice was calm, but I could see the fear in his eyes as well. He kept his distance from Bella physically, still unsure of himself and wracked with guilt after the papercut incident, but I knew that he loved her, too. Much like Emmett, he found her very human reactions to things amusing, and admired her bravery and spunk. "Moxie," he would have called it.

"No."

"Do you have any idea why you aren't seeing her future?" His concern was too much for him to hide then, and I nestled closer to him as I closed my eyes and tried to focus on Bella again.

"I think it's the fetus, Jazz. I can see her in a few minutes, downstairs with everyone else. She's arguing with Edward, and she's angry. She's clear around the edges, but her center is distorted. I think that the fetus has the same defense mechanism as the wolves, maybe. I can't see it's future, and Bella's future is too dependent on it. The distortion is growing; I can see it getting bigger, taking up more of the clear space inside Bella. I wonder how fast this is actually progressing..." I mused.

**Emmett POV**

When Edward finally got done ranting, Carlisle was the first one to say anything.

"Edward, my son. You know that there is little I would not do for you, but I can not allow you to speak to Esme or your wife the way that you are. This is no longer up for discussion. I'm sorry if that hurts you, but I have the welfare of the whole of my family to think about. Rosalie has chosen to depart us, and that wounds me in a way that you are well aware of. I beg of you, son. Please look at the damage that you are doing. You made a promise to support your wife, and you are not keeping it."

Well, shit. I guessed that meant that Carlisle had already figured out that Rose was on her way up to Tanya's place. I knew he hadn't had time to talk to Alice, so he didn't know just how fucked things were, but I was reasonably sure he had a decent idea. Carlisle's pretty quick.

"Carlisle, you will not make decisions for me, or for my wife. I will keep her safe! Bella, please come with me. We'll find another way. We'll adopt, as you said before. Or you can have a human child. Please, don't do this to me, love. You know how I react to your tendency to put yourself in harm's way, and that I can not live in a world where you don't exist. I can not watch you die."

That was a fucking low blow, and he knew it. Bella was never able to hold her own against him when he played the please-don't-hurt-me card. I guess she thought it was a low blow too, because her head snapped up and she made this choking noise that scared the shit out of me, until I realized it was a new pissed-off Bella sound that I hadn't heard yet. About that time, I guess he realized that he'd screwed the pooch, because he made his move. He ran towards her, and he must have been so preoccupied that he wasn't listening for my thoughts, because I was able to stop him before he got to her. The noise of our bodies slamming into one another was loud as hell, and I knew that Alice and Jasper would be there soon to see what all the fuss was. I had just enough time to hope that they were on our side when I heard Jazz snarling at my back.

"Edward! You will not put your hands on her!" Jasper had turned on his menacing, dangerous demeanor. _Thank God._

I could hear Alice in the kitchen, saying soothing, nonsense things to Bella. _Damn. _I'd just gotten her calmed down, and now she was all in a tizzy again because Fuckwad couldn't keep it together. This big wave of calm went out, and I knew that Jazz was at work. Edward slumped onto the couch since it was directed at him, but I was having to work to keep my game face on, myself.

"Dude, you've got to get it together. You're fucking _everything_ up here. She's got her mind made up, don't you realize that? You can't change her mind, and she's going to seriously hate you if you keep trying. Do you understand that you could have killed her just now? What if you'd managed to get your hands on her, moving that fast? You would have broken her fucking neck!" I was working myself up into a good lather, when I heard Alice's dainty little footsteps behind me.

"Emmett's right, Edward. I've seen it. Look at what the path that you're on is going to lead to." Alice narrowed her eyes and let him have it. I don't know what "it" was, but he looked terrible. Almost as bad as he did when he came home from leaving Bella in the woods that day.

From the kitchen, I could hear Esme's light footfalls and some heavier ones that could only be the most clumsy human in the world. When I looked up, Esme was helping Bella into a chair. Edward stood up really quickly, like he was going to try to comfort her or something, but Jasper and I weren't taking any chances. I kind of slid in front of her, and Jazz pushed his shoulder right up against mine.

"Emmett, Jasper, I swear to you that I will not touch her. Please, move aside just a bit so I can see her." He looked pretty sincere, so I stepped over and back a little, so that I was standing right next to Bella's chair. Jasper took her other flank; I guess we didn't need any mind-reading to get into formation.

I watched her looking up at him, trying to figure out why that expression on her face was so familiar. She looked shocked, angry, and kinda put off all at the same time, and I had sure as hell never seen Bella look at Edward that way. All of a sudden, it clicked into place. It was like I was watching some kind of fault line crack in her eyes. She was looking at Edward the way I must have looked at Rosalie the day we got the news.

Oh. Fuck.

"Edward," her rough, scratchy little voice said, very calmly. "I want you to leave."


	5. Chapter 5 Supplement

_Chapter 5: Supplement_

**Bella POV**

My words echoed through the house like a cannon blast. No one moved, no one spoke...no one even breathed. Even I was in shock at what I'd just said; it was instinctual. A sort of knee-jerk reaction to the irrefutable danger that I was in. Edward had always said that he was going to be at my side until I ordered him away, and I knew that he would make good on the promise. I just needed to buy myself a bit of time, to get away from him until the baby was born. I knew that he would see reason when I survived and our child was alive as well.

"Now. I want you to leave. You're not to go back to Italy, or to cause any sort of harm to yourself. I want you whole and sound when the news comes that I have survived the birth, and that our child has been born. Please. Promise me that you will keep yourself safe until word comes from Carlisle, and that you will not involve the Volturi any farther than you already have."

The shock and the sadness on his face was like a knife in my heart. Just like the Third Wife, I had sacrificed my own heart for the life of my child and my mate.

I expected an argument, or pleading. Not the stony silence with which he received my request.

"Of course. If that is what you want, I will leave. I have already told you that you need only ask, and I will step aside. Now I will add one condition to that promise, if you will accept it."

In my shock, I couldn't form the words that would pull an explanation from him. I curled my arms around myself, this time holding the hole closed so that my pretty baby wouldn't fall from me. I nodded my head, having no idea what I was agreeing to. I only knew that I was falling apart, that I was leaving my husband the day we returned from our honeymoon.

"Very well, love. My condition is that, since you have requested that I do not involve the Volturi, in the event that the birth does not go as well as you plan--" the breaking of his voice belied the calm of his demeanor, and I knew that I had not lost him forever--"then I would ask that Emmett and Jasper would save me the trouble of breaking the treaty with the Quileutes. I hesitate to destroy the treaty that the rest of my family may once again depend on in the future, but I have made my intentions quite clear regarding my continued existence in the event of your demise."

I nodded again before replying. "Emmett, Jazz... I need you to make this promise for me. The treaty is too important, and I don't want Jacob to hear a word of this," I said, gesturing vaguely towards my stomach. "I promise you all, I _will_ keep my heart beating. There won't be a need for you to make good on your promise to him, I swear. I just need him to leave until this is finished. Please."

Esme looked heartbroken, and Carlisle wouldn't meet anyone's eyes. Jasper only nodded once, a curt signal of his agreement with Edward, who was suddenly at my side with his arms around me and his lips in my hair.

"I love you, Bella. Always."

Then he was gone.

**Edward POV**

The wordless shock in the minds of my family was deafening.

I understood that my beloved had not ordered me from her side in anger, only as a measure of desperation to save the life of the parasite I had placed inside of her. If her love for me had faded, surely her desperation to bear my child would have cooled as well. Remembering my promise to always do what she needed to be happy, I wrenched away from her, leaving my dead heart in her hands.

I could not go to Denali and hear the vitriol that Rosalie was sure to be spewing at Emmett's defection. I could, however, contribute to keeping Bella safe, even from a distance. I would go back to South America, perhaps even seek out Carlisle's old friends Senna, Zafrina, and Kachiri. Anyone who had ties to the legends of the _Libishomen._ I would learn what sort of monster my wife was carrying; hopefully in time to save her life.

**Emmett POV**

_Shitshitshit._ I knew it was coming when I saw the look on her face. The problem is, Bella didn't seem to know what had happened yet. The only reason I could come up with was that her mind wasn't ready to process such a shitstorm. She didn't look like she had just sent her brand new husband packing. I mean, sure, she looked sad...but not the full-scale devastation I was prepared for. Maybe it was just because she was so sure that she was going to make it, and that he was going to come home. I guess she was still convinced that she was going to eventually get her "Happily Ever After," she just figured she'd have to burn some bridges to get there.

After a few minutes of awkward quiet, Carlisle asked everyone into the dining room. As Bella carefully walked to one of the chairs and sat down, I couldn't help but think about the day that we'd all sat here and discussed her death when Edward still hadn't made up his mind. I was pretty disgusted with myself that I'd been so _whatever_ about it. If Edward had actually snapped in Biology or something, I wouldn't know her. Yeah, guilty didn't even begin to cover it.

So we all sat down, and Carlisle got down to business.

"Bella, you have made the decision that you will be changed as a life-saving measure, should the delivery become too difficult. I must be honest with you; I feel that changing you is an inevitability at this point. Aside from the fact that the Volturi have insisted upon it, I am afraid that this pregnancy could very easily kill you without vampire venom. With that end in mind, we have to decide how to proceed."

She got all pink then, and started gnawing on her bottom lip like crazy. Then she just nodded and took a deep breath.

"I've already thought about that. Obviously, Charlie can't know anything that's happened. As much as it devastates me to do it, we're either going to have to pretend that I've died, or that I'm still on my honeymoon. I was thinking that we could just let him think that Edward and I are still on Isle Esme, until time for enrollment at Dartmouth. We could act like the honeymoon ran long, and that I don't have time to see him or anything until I get in college. Then we could maybe fake something or...I don't know. I would like for him to think that I had a few years of happiness before I died, since that's what he's going to have to think happened to me. If you guys don't mind, I was thinking that the sooner we leave, the better. I don't want to run the risk of anyone stopping by. Maybe you could tell Charlie that you're going to be going up to New Hampshire ahead of us, and helping us get all set up or something."

Man, I knew that Bella was brave, but I didn't realize she was that brave. She really was thinking this all out, and she was prepared to walk away from her dad and everything she knew in the world, without even her husband by her side to help her out, because she knew she had to. Even though it was obviously tearing her up inside.

Carlisle nodded. "Bella, I appreciate your strength and your forethought, but leaving here immediately might not be the best course of action. It takes time to build the sort of medical access that I have here. For instance, I have set aside a small stockpile of Type O Negative blood for you, in the event that a transfusion becomes necessary. Should I need more, I need only to go to the bank and obtain it. In a new place, without the necessary contacts, it would be much, much more difficult."

She wiped the tears off her little face, and sighed so deeply that it had to hurt her fragile chest to push out that much air. "I thought about that, too. Not about the blood, obviously, because I didn't know you'd set some aside for me. But the ultrasounds and the other tests...I know that you have to have a certain amount of credibility to do all of the things that you're doing. So I was thinking that we could go to Ithaca. You guys could tell the same story that you told when you came back here, that Esme didn't like it and wanted to come back. You're already established as a doctor there, and it's far enough away that Charlie wouldn't think to look, if he ever got suspicious. As far as I know, he doesn't even know that you were in Ithaca. He still thinks you were in L.A."

Everyone sat at the table quietly, until Alice spoke up, sounding more like herself than she had since all of this unholy mess had descended on us.

"I think it's a great idea. We'll be in Ithaca by tomorrow night."

The relief was sort of interrupted by Bella's stomach growling. And I mean _growling._ We all laughed, and Bella made some joke about feeding time for the human. She looked pretty messed up after she said it, like it was something she said without thinking. I would have bet anything then that it was an inside thing with Edward, and I figured it was best to get her mind off of it. So I scooped her up and carried her to the kitchen, and sat her on the counter. The rest of the family followed, acting like they were just enjoying the sudden lighthearted mood, but I knew that, just like me, they weren't taking a chance on letting Bella out of their sight.

"Alright, kid. It's been about seventy years since I've eaten, and I don't know how you kiddie-pies do it these days. How do I make you a feast?" I was juggling oranges while I talked, and was totally relieved when I saw a little smile on her face. Not a big one, not the best Bella was capable of, but it was a start.

She eased herself off of the counter, and rolled her eyes at me. She opened the cupboard and found some canned soup, explaining that she was pretty sure she was going to puke it back up anyway, and that it might be easier to bring something back up that was mostly liquid to begin with. When she opened the can and dumped the stuff in a pan, I have to admit, even I was completely disgusted. It was all sticky and runny at the same time, this suspiciously bright yellow color, and it had some noodle things in it that looked like grubworms. No wonder she was going to puke.

******

And, puke she did. Alice hung out in the bathroom with her while she made these awful gagging noises. I felt really bad for the kid. Apparently, so did the rest of the family. Carlisle, Esme and Jasper were all sitting around the living room looking worried and helpless, and I knew that was just going to make Bella even more miserable when she got back. So when Alice brought her around the corner and sat her down, I just looked over at her and started cracking jokes.

"So, Baby Bloodsucker won't let you eat, huh? Can't say I blame him... I wouldn't want that shit you ate either."

"Emmett, language!" Esme loves to scold me. I think I'm her favorite kid, because she gets the chance to scold me more than all of the others combined. Everybody just sort of laughed, except Carlisle.

"What did you say, Emmett?" He looked more curious than anything, but I couldn't figure out what he was asking. He knew exactly what I said, he was sitting right across the room from me. He could have heard me from across a football field, if he'd wanted to.

"I said, 'So, Baby Bloodsucker won't let you eat...' " I just sort of looked at him with one eyebrow raised, waiting for him to explain what was going on in his head.

Then all of the pieces fell into place.

"Oh, I got you. You think that the baby really is more bloodsucker than human, and that it probably wants blood, not runny yellow shit."

"Emmett!"

"Sorry, Mom. I got carried away. I'm having a major breakthrough here. Some old guy said 'Eureka,' I cuss. You have to let some things slide in the name of progress."

Esme snorted, but she had a smile on her face, so I knew I was forgiven. Bella looked like someone had hit her in the face with a brick and told her that she was going to have to eat a live rattlesnake. Then she ran back to the bathroom, I guess to puke some more. Alice had to catch her when she almost busted her ass, but she made it to the toilet with enough time to spare.

"Alice, try to talk her down. I really am worrying, here." I whispered low enough that Bella didn't have a chance of hearing me, but I know Alice got me loud and clear.

**Edward POV**

I was in Seattle, waiting in a hotel room for the sun to go down. Though I knew it was more prudent to wait for nightfall to begin my journey, it was difficult to convince myself to be prudent when I knew Bella's life was hanging in the balance.

I tried to gather my thoughts, to make a cohesive plan. The last time I had tried my hand at tracking had been an abject failure; I could only hope that, since my quarry was not actively avoiding me, I might have better luck.

Kaure would be no help, she had already told me all that she knew. The only logical step was to go to the Amazons. They would help me; they knew the forests and the legends implicitly.

As soon as the sun went down, I got into my car and tore down the highway towards the airport. Hopefully, I would soon have some answers to take back to my Bella.

**Bella POV**

I took a deep breath and rinsed my mouth after brushing my teeth for the second time in twenty minutes. _Blood._ I had known that this was an inevitable part of the life I had chosen to lead, but I was counting on having a burning need that would counteract any qualms I might have about drinking it, not having to dive into a cupful of Type O while I was still human. Still, if it would allow my little nudger to get some sustenance, and keep me from vomiting up everything I came in to contact with, it would be worth it.

Alice helped me back to the couch and covered me with a thick quilt as Carlisle solemnly passed me a thick plastic cup with a lid and a straw that completely concealed its contents. It did nothing to hinder the smell, but it was something I was just going to have to endure. I held my breath, and dove it.

Surprisingly, it wasn't bad. In fact, it tasted wonderful. My mind didn't even have time to register what I was drinking, only that it almost immediately filled me with a surge of strength. I hadn't realized how weak I was until I felt myself growing stronger. I still didn't feel like myself, but I felt better than I had since I began showing the symptoms of my pregnancy.

All too soon, I heard the slurping noise that indicates an empty cup, and it reminded me of drinking milkshakes with Renee when I was a child. I felt a stab of remorse when I thought of her childlike face and her unquestioning love for me. I was abandoning her to her own devices, with only Phil to look after her. What if he decided he no longer wanted to be responsible for her? Who would take care of her when I no longer could? I shoved the thought from my mind, along with the accompanying one of Charlie ordering pizza every night or making bacon and eggs for dinner. I hoped that Jacob would have enough lingering tenderness for me to look in on Charlie from time to time. Maybe a lingering tenderness wasn't even necessary. He was his father's best friend; Jake had probably spent more time with Charlie in his life than I had. I could only hope that was enough to keep Charlie protected.

I looked up from my reverie to see that Esme was standing in front of me with her hand held out for the empty cup. I handed it to her, and she looked at me with such tenderness that it brought new tears to my eyes.

"Dear, is there anything I can get for you? Carlisle would feel more comfortable if you attempted to eat solid food as well, perhaps using the blood as a supplement. While it is obviously fulfilling the child's needs, we must look after yours as well. Is there anything in particular that sounds appealing to you?"

"Oh, Esme. Thank you so much for everything that you've done for me. All of you. I've torn your family apart, and you're all still being so wonderful to me." My sobs caught in my chest as I allowed myself to think, for the first time, about the departure of Rosalie. Edward had told me that a vampire's attachment to their mate was absolute and unchanging, yet Emmett seemed to be in fine spirits. I made my mind up to ask Alice or Esme about it the next time he went hunting, but I still felt awful that she'd left him on my account. Esme sat down next to me, and wrapped her arms around me for the hundredth time that day.

"Bella, our family is too strong to be torn apart. The love that we feel for each other can survive even great distances. We have not always been together, like you've known us. Sometimes Rosalie and Emmett have lived apart from us, sometimes Alice and Jasper; even Edward once struck out on his own, as I'm sure he's told you. You have not torn apart our family. If there is a piece that has been torn away, it is because it was a tenuous piece to begin with. You must realize that Rosalie has never fully forgiven Carlisle for taking her life away from her, as she sees it. She has been bitter and angry for almost one hundred years. Perhaps this situation was the catalyst that sent her away, but there would have been another one to do so had this not occurred. Please, try to stop heaping blame upon yourself, dear. We love you, and you are a part of this family now, just as integral a part of it as anyone else. Remember that."

"I love you, Esme. I don't know if I've ever just come out and told you that before, but I do. I love you all."

Suddenly, I was surrounded by four vampires, and the one standing on the fringes of the group even looked at me with affection. I understood how difficult it was for Jasper to be near me, and the fact that even my breath probably smelled like blood was enough for him to keep his distance; but Alice had her arm around my shoulders and was lightly patting my knee with her free hand, murmuring under her breath too fast for me to make out the words. I didn't know what she was saying, but it was comforting. Carlisle looked at me very studiously, peering deep into my eyes.

"The blood has done wonders for you, Bella. You look and sound much stronger. I know that Esme has informed you that I would feel more comfortable if you would attempt to eat again, but if you feel averse to the idea, we can wait as long as you need to." Carlisle didn't have to speak his love for it to be known. It showed clearly in every ounce of concern that he had, and how diligently he was working to keep me safe and whole through something that most of the world would consider impossible. I looked at the faces of the family around me, and I knew that I was home. There would never be a day that I wouldn't miss my human family, but I had to give them up in order to maintain the one that I had, and the new member of my family that was growing inside of me.

"I can cook for myself. I'm feeling so much better, and I do have a bit of an appetite."

Emmett took my hand and winked down at me, acknowledging my declaration in his own way.

"What do you want to eat, Half-pint? I'll be your assistant. I'll hand you the wrong things and I'll light something on fire. Sound like fun?


	6. Chapter 6 Moving Day

_Chapter 6: Moving Day_

**Bella POV**

That night, I slept in Edward's room with Alice by my side. Despite our marriage, I still thought of the room--and the bed--as Edward's.

"Alice, " I whispered. "I thought you were angry with me. You didn't even speak to me when we got to the airport, or even when we got back home. Not until Edward tried to grab me." I swallowed thickly at the last sentence, visions of the chaotic scene flashing before my eyes.

"Oh, Bella. I know you thought that I was angry, but I'm just so scared. You have to understand that I rely on my special abilities far more than I should, and to suddenly be without them where you're concerned is terrifying for me." She pulled me closer to her, wrapping me in her tiny little arms and sighing.

"What do you mean, where I'm concerned? You can't see me anymore? Like when I was…you know, in La Push?" Saying Jacob's name was still difficult for me, and knowing that the sight of his face distorted in anger was likely to be my last memory of him pained me. I wanted to remember the sunny, beautiful Jacob that didn't believe in vampires. The one who was afraid I would think he was a superstitious native, not Sam's Jacob, with his hard eyes and clenched fists.

She sighed heavily again, and continued. "Something like that. I explained to Jasper earlier that you were clear around the edges, but the center of you is distorted, like static on a radio or a bad television reception. The distortion in the middle is growing perceptibly, and I can not see you separated from it yet. So yes, I assume that the baby has a similar defense mechanism to the wolves. I can't see it, and since your future is so completely intertwined with his or hers, I can no longer see much of you either." She grimaced like she was in pain, and I felt a fresh wave of guilt wash over me. I was hurting everyone with this decision. My family was missing two members, one of which was my own husband; but I couldn't bear to make the decision that would lead to the death of my defenseless little baby.

"What about Edward and Rosalie? Aren't you mad that they left because of me? Because I _made_ Edward leave?" I held my breath, worried about her response. Clearly, she was unwilling to leave me unattended, but that didn't mean that she wasn't disgusted with my behavior. Being irritated at a person and abandoning them to death were two totally separate things.

"Bella, Rosalie would have left us eventually anyway. Esme told you that she still harbors a grudge against Carlisle, but she didn't know that Rosalie had already made the decision to leave if and when you were ever changed. Granted, she intended to leave with Emmett, but I had already prepared myself for the absence of my sister. Don't misunderstand me, I love Rosalie. But she is…difficult, even under the best circumstances. Emmett's ability to let her go is surprising, but I think that it might be best for both of them. He was never meant to be the sort of man that knuckles under, and Rosalie has kept him on a very short leash for the last seventy years. As for Edward, you have done the thing that you felt you needed to do to maintain your safety. I could never blame you for keeping yourself safe, Bella. This is the first time you've shown the slightest inclination to do so!" She winked at me then, and I knew that everything would be fine between my sister and I, regardless of the strain I was putting on the relationship. With that thought, I drifted off to sleep, hoping to keep the nightmares of the Volturi at bay.

****

When I awoke the next morning, after a fitful sleep, I was shocked at the controlled chaos around me.

All of the furniture was still in place, but it was covered with large, white sheets; the books and paintings that I had come to recognize as an inextricable part of my vampires lives were missing. I looked around me in confusion, wondering what had happened while I was sleeping when I heard a booming laugh that echoed in the suddenly cavernous, almost bare room.

"Hey, Half-pint! Rise and shine, we've got a big day ahead of us!" His arms were loaded with large wooden pallets used for shipping, and a bit of the packing material that must have been inside them had somehow found it's way into his black curls. The sight of him covered in what looked like dried grass made me giggle; I couldn't help myself. After the strain of the last few days, Emmett's behavior was the first bit of normalcy. Silly Emmett, making a mess of something that the rest of the family could do without wrinkling their designer clothing!

**Emmett POV**

I heard Bella moving around in Edward's room, so I knew she was awake. I was in Jasper's study, helping him box up some of his Civil War battlefield paintings, when I had an idea.

I knew that the kid had been through a fuckton of stress the last couple days, and I had missed her silly little giggle, so I scooped up a handful of the shit that you use to pack things up so they won't break, and I rubbed it in my hair. Jasper just sort of looked at me like I'd lost my mind, so I leaned over to whisper to him.

"Trying to make Bella laugh. She'll think it's funny that I can't even pack a painting without making a mess." He nodded in approval, with a smirk on his face. That's the thing about Jazz; everybody who meets him thinks that he's real uptight and all, because they don't realize that he's just trying not to kill them all the time. When he doesn't have the pressure of keeping it together, he's got a hell of a sense of humor.

He's also pretty insightful.

"You've taken to Bella very easily since she got home." He left it at that, and that's another thing I appreciate about him. He knew I didn't want to talk about Rosalie, so he didn't mention her. He just sort of gave me this thoughtful look, and waited for me to respond.

"I've always liked Bella. She's tough. Of course, she doesn't give herself enough credit, but I think that's just because she's always so afraid that Edward is better than her. She's going through a really shitty time, and I know that she doesn't like people to make a fuss over her. Instead of fawning over her all of the time, I'm trying to make sure that she feels like nothing has changed. As much as I can, given that everything _is_ all fucked. I'm afraid that she's going to die, but most of me knows that's a stupid thing to worry about. If anyone could make it through this mess still breathing, it would be Half-pint." He sort of grinned at the nickname, remembering when I started calling her that. Just like the grassy shit in my hair, that was a joke I made to cheer _him_ up, after he tried to drink her up. "Jazz," I'd said, "that's an awful lot of trouble to go to for a half a pint. She's so little, she couldn't hold much more than that." Edward hadn't been amused, but even Carlisle had cracked a little smile at it.

I heard her fumbling her way down the second flight of stairs, and I winked at him before I took off with an armload of his stuff.

**Jasper POV**

Emmett and I were in my study, packing up all of my belongings. After I was finished, we only had Edward and Bella's room left, so I was trying to hurry. We wanted to have the truck loaded so it could be on the road as soon as the driver arrived. Though it would have been more economical for one of us to drive it, none of us had the patience. Even with our heightened senses, it was impossible to drive a moving truck at a respectable speed.

A sudden flurry of movement in my peripheral vision caught my attention, and I felt amusement emanating from Emmett, so I looked over at him to find that he was in a frenzy, tangling the packing material from one of the pallets into his hair. I shot him a quizzical look, and he answered with a grin.

""Trying to make Bella laugh. She'll think it's funny that I can't even pack a painting without making a mess." _Good idea._ I nodded and smiled, and then I caught the affection he was feeling. Trying to be as delicate as possible, I approached the subject. I could feel his reluctance, and assumed that it was due to his desire not to speak of Rosalie and her departure.

""You've taken to Bella very easily since she got home." I waited patiently for his response, and I was surprised at the insight behind it, as well as the depth of his protective instinct towards Bella. I hadn't considered her distaste for the limelight, and the fact that he had belied his tenderness towards her. As he spoke, I struggled to maintain a lighthearted expression. Emmett wasn't aware of it, but the emotion pouring from him when he spoke of Bella, almost reverently, was love. I couldn't yet determine whether it was simply a deep platonic feeling, or something far more complex, but the feeling was undeniable. Emmett loved Bella, far more than I had ever realized.

**Carlisle POV**

I quickly uncovered the dining room table and chairs, wondering if it were to be the last meeting the fractured pieces of my family was to have at this particular table. Flooded with memories, I hesitated for a fraction of a second.

_Edward shouting at Rosalie about her proficiency as an assassin. Jasper's resolve to end the conflict. Emmett's nonplussed responses. Esme's desperation to keep Edward with us. Later, Bella's demand for a vote on her humanity. Our most recent discussion, during which Bella had made the first steps toward eschewing that humanity._

I truly harbored no ill will towards Bella for the departure of Rosalie and Edward. Rosalie's bitterness had driven her away from us before, though she had never been without Emmett. I felt a flash of paternal worry for her, but shoved it away. Rosalie had made her choice. Edward's flight had been a necessary, albeit painful, evil. Bella's life was truly endangered by his presence, perhaps more than it ever had been before. I missed my son, and I hoped for his speedy return, but I knew that it was the height of recklessness to allow him to remain with us. I had decided to find a way to separate them temporarily before Bella had made the decision herself. I knew it was torturing her, but there honestly was no other way to proceed. Edward had made it impossible for him to safely remain in our home.

"Can you all join me for one last meeting in this house?" I spoke in a normal tone, knowing everyone could hear me. I briefly considered Bella's less acute, human hearing, but Alice was already towing her along at a human speed.

When everyone was seated, I began. "Bella, I have spoken to your father. He is under the assumption that you are to remain in South America with Edward until the day before enrollment. He asked that I pass along his affections, and he was not suspicious. The hospital in Ithaca is pleased to have me return, though I did explain to them that a family illness would mean that I would only be available part time until the situation was resolved. Your plan is coming together beautifully." I smiled at her, trying to be reassuring. I knew that the mention of her father's message was sure to pain her, but it would have been wrong of me not to pass it along. "The driver will be arriving in approximately three hours to begin his journey to the Ithaca house. We will be departing for the airport immediately after his arrival. When reach our destination, I will contact Edward so that he will not be surprised to find us gone, should he arrive here. The vehicles will be shipped from the airport to our new home, but it will take four to five days for them to arrive, so we will be renting a van at the airport. I thought it best to leave Rosalie's BMW here, in the event that she should return for it."

Everyone nodded their assent, and I stood. "I think it best if we all hunt now, in shifts. Emmett, would you mind accompanying me? Alice, Jasper and Esme can go together when we return, if they wish."

Emmett jumped up, his boundless enthusiasm apparent on his face. I searched it for some hint of regret at Rosalie's absence, and could find none. As we made our way through the forest, I stopped him when we were at a discreet distance from the house that would keep us out of the others' range of hearing.

"Emmett, would you like to talk about what's happened? If you would rather not, I will respect your decision, but I must admit, I am quite curious."


	7. Chapter 7 An Explanation

_Chapter 7: An Explanation_

**Emmett POV**

When Carlisle said he wanted to hunt with me, alone, I knew what was up. I'd pretty much figured that I couldn't avoid it forever, and I'd rather clear the air with Carlisle first. He could pass on what he thought was best to the others, and I wouldn't have to talk about it again.

While we were running through the forest, I tried to collect myself. How do you get yourself together for that kind of conversation, though? _"Hey Dad, I know you thought that it couldn't happen, but I don't much feel like seeing my wife ever again."_ Ugh. Awkward.

When he stopped far enough away that the nosy, deranged pixie couldn't hear, I knew it was all going down, whether I liked it or not.

"Emmett, would you like to talk about what's happened? If you would rather not, I will respect your decision, but I must admit, I am quite curious." Carlisle didn't look pissed or anything; mostly he just looked curious, like he said. And maybe a little bit concerned, but not mad.

"I don't know," I said. "I can't explain it. She was just screaming about Bella and acting like a crazy bitch, and something…_changed_. I know you think that vampires mate for life, and that the bond between mates is unbreakable, but I think I have a theory about it. You know how Esme fell in love with you when she was still human, before everything went to shit for her? Or how Jasper met Alice and couldn't be away from her? Well, I was human when I met Rose, but only for a little while. I was damn near dead, and she saved me. I didn't have any real interaction with her, though. She was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, and I felt all kinds of grateful, you know? But I didn't meet her as a vampire and fall into some kind of lifelong love thing. I just woke up with all of these new abilities, and a hot girl that wanted me. The whole thing was based on gratitude, and I'm pretty easygoing, so I sort of went with it. Sure, she had temper tantrums, but I could take it. I'd never seen her as cruel, just sort of snobby and rude. But when she started in on her Bella freak-out, I just couldn't take anymore. It was like something snapped, and I couldn't stand the sight of her. I tried to keep it to myself, because I knew that nobody needed this stress on top of everything going on with Bella. If you want to tell all of the others what happened, that's fine. I'd rather not talk about it myself, because it's weird and uncomfortable, and my fucked up relationship is not the priority here. Besides, it's just a theory, and it might be completely wrong. I might not have a clue why I feel the way I do now, but it _is_ how I feel. The only thing I know to do is to just go with the flow, take care of Bella, and hope for the best for everybody when all of this is done. "

He nodded, all solemn and shit, taking in the big gush of crazy I'd just dumped on him.

"Well, Emmett. There may be something to your theory, and there may not be. In the end, the how and why of the situation is not important, only the outcome. You have chosen not to continue your relationship with Rosalie, and I must admit that I feel it is the wisest course of action. To attempt to maintain that relationship in light of your recent changes would be wrong for both of you. Rosalie's bitterness has long been a facet of our family dynamic, and it will be strange to be without her, but I think that is best for the whole of the family if the two of you continue your separation. Because of her residual anger towards me, I think it best that she has chosen to leave. It would wound me deeply if you made the same decision."

"Aw, Carlisle, no! I'm not going anywhere. I belong here, with you guys."

He smiled then, and it finally dawned on me how much pressure he'd been under, worrying about all of our marriages and Bella's health, then worrying that I was gonna leave on top of it all. I took off into the trees and decimated a herd of deer, and wondered how Bella was feeling.

**Bella POV**

With everything in order, I felt myself relax a bit. I sat on the kitchen floor, with my cup and a plate full of eggs, Alice next to me chattering away and shoving catalogs in my face.

"I've already shipped most your new wardrobe to Ithaca, but you've got to pick out your bedroom stuff. You've been taking baby steps towards independence, and the next step is to pick out your own furniture."

I looked through the catalogs, silently cursing Alice. Bedroom stuff! Of all the things to worry about! Then my eyes lit on a beautiful canopy style bed made of dark wood, looking just like the one I would imagine in Elizabeth Bennett's room, and I felt my heart melt. The vanity table had a mirror large enough to satisfy even Alice, and the large armoire would hold about a third of the clothing she'd already ordered for me. She saw my reaction and squealed.

"Oh, I'm so glad you like it! It's already in the bedroom at the new house! I found the most beautiful bedding for it, and I hope you don't mind but I just know you so well and…" She chattered on, almost too quickly for me to understand with a worried crease in her forehead. Determined to make her smile again, I leaned over and kissed her cheek. Knowing that extravagance was part of the Cullen lifestyle, and that I was a Cullen now, I swallowed my reluctance and smiled down at her.

"You're the world's most perfect sister. You know me so well; I love it." With a smile, I added, "I'm sure that your freaky visions didn't tip you off at all about what I would pick out, did they?" I winked and smiled at her before continuing, "I wonder if I should pick out baby furniture? I mean, the baby _is_ half human…What if he or she needs to sleep?" As I spoke, I found myself picturing my little nudger all over again, wondering if it was a boy or a girl. My hand drifted down to my abdomen, which was very obviously showing the beginnings of a baby bump. The movements of the baby had become stronger and a bit painful, but I was determined to hide the amount of pain it caused me from my family. They were already so worried about me, and no amount of worrying would change the fact that this child seemed to have inherited its father's strength.

**Alice POV**

Bella and I sat in the kitchen floor, surrounded by high-end furniture catalogs. I had already ordered her bedroom furniture because I knew her taste as well as I did my own, but I had also recognized her newfound independence. I didn't want her to feel like we were making her decisions for her again, so we went through the charade of picking it out. When her eyes fell onto the Georgian style ensemble I'd already known she would love, I smiled and let out a yelp.

"Oh, I'm so glad you like it! It's already in the bedroom at the new house! I found the most beautiful bedding for it, and I hope you don't mind but I just know you so well and…" I prattled on, a little manic in my worry that she was going to feel like I had chosen for her, despite my carefully planned show.

To my relief, she just grinned at me with a smile I hadn't seen on her face in weeks. "You're the world's most perfect sister. You know me so well; I love it. I'm sure that your freaky visions didn't tip you off at all about what I would pick out, did they? I wonder if I should pick out baby furniture? I mean, the baby _is_ half human…What if he or she needs to sleep?" She smiled and winked at me, and I realized that she thought I'd foreseen the choice, even though I hadn't. I'd stopped trying to look for Bella's future when it started making my head ache.

"Well, I didn't actually _see_ it; I can't see you very well anymore, remember? I just knew you would love it because I know my sister." I put my arm around her, being very careful not to jostle her or hurt her with my strength. "Now, as for the baby, I was thinking that we should maybe play the wait-and-see game, since we don't know about its sleeping habits or how fast it will mature. Your pregnancy is progressing so rapidly, I don't know how long the baby will even need a crib, if it does sleep. Which it may not, and I don't know because your frustrating little bundle of joy," I paused and patted her belly very lightly, "is confusing the hell out of me."

**Esme POV**

I listened to my daughters discussing furniture and clothing, and I couldn't help but smile to myself at the normality of the conversation. Finally, they sounded like the carefree sisters they had been before Bella's startling news sent us all into a tailspin. When the conversation turned to the rapid progression of Bella's pregnancy, I felt a thrill of fear run through me. The very thing I had been avoiding.

I couldn't help but be afraid that the rapid maturation of the fetus would extend to its life as a being complete in itself, once separated from Bella. The very unknown nature of the baby that was threatening Bella's life could threaten its own.

Bella's health had rapidly improved after Emmett's realization that the baby was craving blood, but it had not dispelled my worries for both Bella and her child. I saw the twinges of pain on her face and the way that she would absentmindedly stroke her stomach during them, subconsciously trying to soothe the child inside of her into stillness. I vaguely remembered the action from my own human pregnancy, but as I recalled, it was much, much later that the movements of my son had caused me pain.

I made a note to ask Carlisle about researching hybrid children once we arrived in Ithaca; with Jasper's studious tendencies, he was invaluable as a research assistant. If anyone could find hidden legends of half-vampire babies, it would be Jasper.

**Carlisle POV**

As Emmett and I returned to the house, I heard the chirp of my cell phone. I looked down and saw Edward's name on the display, and motioned for Emmett to continue without me, although I knew that he would not leave my side during a conversation with Edward.

As I suspected, when I said Edward's name, Emmett halted at my side.

"Edward, my son. How are you holding up?"

"_I miss her so desperately, Carlisle. I am calling to ask about her health, and to inform you that I'm in South America, looking for the Amazons."_

"The Amazons? Interesting idea, Edward. I presume that you're seeking out the old legends of the area? Bella's health has improved greatly; Emmett discovered that the fetus was craving blood, so she's been drinking the type O that I had set aside for her, should a transfusion become necessary."

"_Bella is drinking blood?!"_

"Yes, quite easily. It surprised us all. Of course, she was completely averse to the idea in the beginning, but after her first attempt went well, she's been doing wonderfully with it. We've discovered that it satisfies a craving that she has now. I suspect that it's a sympathetic craving, such as women craving ice cream during normal pregnancies due to an underlying need for added calcium."

The silence on the other end of the line was absolute.

"Edward?"

"_Emmett has been forcing blood down Bella's throat?"_ The threatening tone of his voice was not lost on me, nor Emmett who was close enough to hear the conversation. I put my hand on his arm to signal that he should remain quiet, and he thankfully complied.

"Your brother has not _forced_ anything on your wife. We have all simply done what was best for her in your absence. If you could see the miraculous turn her health has taken, you would agree with us. The drinking of blood has allowed Bella to eat solid food as well, keeping her strength and that of the fetus at an acceptable level. Please, Edward. Tell me about your plan to locate the Amazons."

I heard a heavy sigh, and his voice sounded much more calm when he responded. _"_ _I'm going to ask them to help me locate another hybrid child. If the legends regarding the death of their mortal mothers exists, then they must exist as well."_

He abruptly ended the call, and I resumed my run back to the house with a heavy heart for the pain of my son, who was suffering so.

**Emmett POV**

Okay, I got that Edward was torn up, but he really pissed me off with all that _"forcing blood down Bella's throat"_ bullshit. I mean, it hadn't even really been my idea. I just called the kid a funny name, and Carlisle ran with it. I didn't understand why everybody wanted to give me credit for it; I was glad that it helped her out. Hell, I wished it had been my idea. But it wasn't.

On a lighter note, the guy Carlisle hired to drive the truck to Ithaca was hilarious. He walked in to get the keys, and the first person he saw was an obviously pregnant, obviously young Bella. He kept looking around at me, Jazz and Carlisle, trying to figure out who was responsible for knocking up such a sweet, innocent young girl. He kept patting her hand, talking about how she looked tired and what a bad time his wife had with her pregnancies, being all sympathetic. Then he would look up at us like he wanted to strangle somebody, so I walked over and put my arm around her. His eyes almost popped out of his head when he really got a good look at how big I am. It was great.

I jumped in the Jeep and got in line behind Alice and Jasper, ready to head out to the Seattle airport. To be honest, I was totally ready for a change of scenery. It made me a little nervous to be away from Bella, but it was only natural. I'd been on red alert, making sure that she was okay since she got back. I knew that Esme was the smarter choice for Bella's roadtrip buddy; she'd be a hell of a lot better at the girl talk than me or Carlisle. Still, it made me kind of twitchy until I reminded myself that we'd hit Seattle in less than an hour.

****Author's Note**** I'm deliberately changing the part of BD that chronicles Bella's illness at the beginning of Jacob Black's POV, because I think that Emmett's intuitions about the need for blood would have come earlier than they did in the novel. While she will still have the issues regarding Renesmee's strength and some broken bones later on, my version of the pregnancy isn't going to be nearly so grisly.


	8. Chapter 8 An Arrival

_hapter 8:_ _An Arrival_

**Esme POV**

As Bella and I left Forks behind, I pretended not to notice the tears running down her cheeks. I knew how desperately she wanted to keep us from realizing the extent of her pain, and I felt it best to respect her wishes. I wondered if she was thinking of Charlie or Jacob Black, or even mourning the place where she'd found and fallen in love with Edward.

When the lights of Seattle became visible to her weaker eyes, she relaxed noticeably. In true Bella fashion, the decision had been made and there would be no more agonizing about it. I'd hoped that we would have time to talk, just the two of us, but I wanted to give her time to mourn for her humanity. I knew that soon, we would have all of the time in the world.

**Bella POV**

I couldn't help getting a little teary on the way to the airport. Esme, thoughtful as ever, took a different route out of Forks than the rest of the family so that we didn't pass the police station or my father's house. I closed my eyes and tried to remember Charlie's scent, Jacob's smile… the faces of all of the people in La Push that I loved, and sweet Angela Weber. I silently wished them all happy lives as we sped through the falling dusk.

As soon as I saw the lights of Seattle, I felt my mood lighten. There was something comforting about city lights, regardless of what else was happening in my life. When we reached the airport, we found the rest of the family standing at the gate, waiting for us. I had just been standing in this very airport with Edward a little more than twenty-four hours prior, not realizing how abruptly and irrevocably my life would be changed when we returned home.

As we boarded the plane, Alice looked at me and smiled.

"Carlisle?" She put on her sweet-and-innocent face. When he looked in her direction, she continued. "I know you said that we would be renting a van when we got to New York, but I think it might be a good idea to rent two." Jasper snorted, momentarily forgetting his tension at being surrounded by tasty humans, and I realized that was the point all along; to distract Jasper until the moment of immersion had passed. She continued, never missing a beat, when Carlisle gave her a quizzical glance. "I mean, I had to bring all of my clothes and all of Bella's and I'm just saying that there's not going to be much room if we're all squished in one van with all those bags. That's all." I smiled at Alice's predilection for run-on sentences when she was excited, and shook my head. I would miss my human family desperately, but I knew that I could not live without the Cullens.

****

The flight passed without any remarkable occurrences, other than my embarrassing need to go to the bathroom what felt like every ten minutes. My shrinking bladder made for a very long flight, and the sympathy in the other passengers' eyes was humiliating. I knew, to them, that I looked like another dumb pregnant teenager, so I made sure to brush my hair back with my left hand, unobtrusively flashing my wedding bands. _Take that. I'm married. Hah. _My triumph didn't last long, because that was about the time I remembered that I didn't even know exactly where my husband was. Carlisle had told me that he'd gone to South America to hack through the rainforest and research ancient legends, but hadn't given me any other details. I steeled myself, expecting to feel the opening of my chest when his name was mentioned, but all I felt was regret for hurting him by sending him away, and a flash of residual anger for the stunt he'd pulled with me the day before. I wondered briefly why the hole was still so firmly closed, but I drifted off to sleep before I could give it any more thought.

****

I woke up in a huge, beautiful bedroom that was completely unfamiliar. Confused about my surroundings, I rubbed my eyes until I recognized the bedroom furniture that Alice and I had chosen. I felt a swell of pride when I realized that I had chosen how the room would look without Edward's approval, even though this would ostensibly be his room one day, too. Somehow, this room felt like _mine_ in a way that the room in Forks never could. The logical part of my mind knew that Edward would never have interfered with my choosing to begin with, but I couldn't help feeling a bit of spiteful independence. I got out of bed and wandered to the door ahead of me that was slightly ajar, and looked like it led to a bathroom.

It was definitely a bathroom, but it was bigger than my old bedroom in Charlie's house. It had an enormous old clawfoot bathtub, a pedestal sink, and one of those old fashioned toilets with the tank far above it with a pull chain. I loved it.

Sitting on a table next to the sink was my familiar bag of toiletries, so I brushed my teeth and stood in the center of the room, contemplating a long bath. I didn't have much time to deliberate before I heard Alice's voice pealing down the hall.

"You can take a bath later! Right now, you're going to look at the rest of the house!" She grabbed my hand and pulled me from the room, pointing at doors as we passed them. "This one here," she said, pointing to the left, "is Emmett and-- well, Emmett's room." She didn't acknowledge her near-slip, and I didn't either. "Here," she pointed to the right, "is Jasper's study, and the one next to it is our bedroom. That last door down there by the stairs is Carlisle's office. Esme and Carlisle have the third floor master suite to themselves. You and I have adjoining bathrooms, and there's another one," she pointed to the left again, "right there." We made our way down the stairs carefully, Alice holding my elbow in one hand with her other arm wrapped around my waist. I was noticeably bigger today, and I felt swollen and uncomfortable. When we reached the foot of the stairs, I smiled in recognition. None of the paintings were on the walls yet, and there was only a smattering of books on the built-in shelves, but the color scheme that meant the Cullens was apparent. Pale on pale, with massive windows, the house wasn't laid out like the one in Forks, but it felt the same. Like home.

Esme was in the kitchen, unpacking bags of groceries. I looked down as my stomach growled, and when I looked up, Alice was already standing next to me with my cup in hand.

We'd figured out in Forks that the only way I could keep food down was to drink first, and then eat, so after I drained the cup, I sat it on the counter and took the bottle of water Alice had in her hand.

"Go. Sit." She pointed at the little table in the breakfast nook area of the kitchen, and sat a glass of orange juice in front of me. "Carlisle says you need folic acid. Drink your orange juice and take your vitamin. I'll make you breakfast." I made a martyred face at the uncomfortably large vitamin, but before I could say anything, Alice was standing in front of me with her finger pointed. "Take it, Bella. What do you want for breakfast? I can cook _everything_ now. I watched the food channel and read recipes online all night last night. You're not cooking yourself another meal until -- well, probably ever." She looked so proud of herself that I couldn't help but smile, so I popped the vitamin in my mouth and grimaced as I washed it down with the water. Esme chuckled at Alice's antics, and shot a silly look over her head. I spluttered, almost shooting the water out of my nose, but recovering at the last minute.

"Hmm… Everything, you say? How about waffles?" Esme reached into the freezer and pulled out a box of pre-made waffles, and I snickered, thinking about Alice's reaction. Just as I suspected, she didn't let me down.

"Frozen waffles?!" she scoffed. "I didn't spend all night studying just to put some frozen things in a toaster! I'm making waffles. _Real _waffles."

She flitted around the kitchen, mixing things and making a tremendous mess. As she worked, I realized that the house was abnormally quiet. "Where is everyone?" I asked.

Esme looked up from the silverware she was sorting and smiled. "Carlisle and the boys went to exchange the rental vans for something a bit more efficient, and then they're going hunting. They'll be gone a while, so I thought that we could have some girl time."

Of course, I turned bright red. "Is there, uh, something in particular you'd like to talk about?" _Please not Edward please not Edward please not--_

"Not Edward, Bella. Relax. We just want to talk about the baby. You know, your plans, what you want to name it, whether you want a boy or a girl. We've been so busy worrying about your health that we haven't given you a chance to be happy about this surprise visitor." She winked conspiratorially at me, and sat a plate of the most beautiful waffles I've ever seen in front of me. Topped with what looked like fresh whipped cream and raspberries, they looked like a picture in a culinary magazine.

I took a bite, and they tasted better than they looked. Alice had apparently learned well; I would have to send up a thanks to the gods of cable TV. "Well, that sounds like a great time, actually. Can I take a bath first, though? I always feel a little scummy after being on a plane."

"Of course. That was part of the plan for your day anyway. I'm glad you like the waffles," she giggled. She disappeared, and I heard the faint sound of water running above me.

"Alice is trying to make up for her behavior when you returned. She feels very guilty about your being under the misapprehension that she was angry with you. If she begins to tire you, please tell us. She wants to be as…optimistic, I suppose, as she can. That doesn't mean that we aren't all worried sick, just that the decision has been made and we want you to enjoy a bit of traditional mother-to-be pampering." Under the fear in Esme's eyes, I could see the beginnings of excitement.

****

Alice helped me back up the stairs to my palatial bathroom, and I caught the scent of lavender in the air. "Carlisle says it's calming," she explained. As she perched on the closed lid of the toilet, I began to undress. Any modesty that I'd ever had around Alice had flown out the window when I was recovering from my "fall down the stairs" in Phoenix, out of necessity. After helping me bathe for so many weeks, it was not a strange occurrence for her to keep me company as I soaked in a bath.

I winced as I lifted my arms over my head to pull off the sweatshirt I was wearing. It seemed like the increased weight of my stomach was pulling it uncomfortably downwards as I raised my arms. While the shirt was still covering my face, I heard a gasp of shock. I hurriedly pulled the shirt the rest of the way over my head and looked at Alice in confusion. I followed her eyes downward, to my abdomen.

Just to the left of my navel was an angry looking bruise about the size of my fist, mottled black and violent blue colors. There was a tinge of purple around the outside perimeter that faded to an unhealthy yellow, and as I probed it with my fingers, I hissed with pain.

I looked back up at Alice, determined to hide any fear I had. I suppose she had come to the same conclusion, because she was wearing her happy-face again. Anyone who didn't know her would never suspect that it was forced.

I finished undressing, and eased myself in the tub. Once again, Alice held tight to my elbow until I was safely seated, and I sank down until the water was touching my chin. I draped the warm washcloth Alice handed me over my face, and settled in.

"So, what was it you wanted to talk about?" I asked, hoping that the washcloth over my face would hide my trepidation.

"I _want_ to talk about the baby, but we have to wait until you're out of the tub and Esme can join us. What do _you_ want to talk about?"

I decided to just dive right in, and hope for the best. "I know that Rosalie left because of me, and I want to know why Emmett didn't go with her. It's not that I'm not unbelievably grateful to him for staying, but I can't understand why he would. I always thought that vampires mated for life."

"Well," she began, "I don't know why he stayed, because I haven't asked him. I assume it's because he cares for you, and because life with Rosalie has been very tense for some time. But no, vampires don't necessarily mate for life. Most do, but sometimes…well, things happen. Look at Tanya, Kate and Irina. They were the basis for all of the succubi myths. They prefer human men, and that preference led to their reverence for human life. Irina found a mate in Laurent eventually, but she is hundreds of years old. It's relatively rare for vampires to go their separate ways in a romantic relationship, but it does happen. The thing that makes us inherently faithful, for the most part, is that it's extremely difficult for us to experience change. We are set in our habits and ideas, for the most part. When a change _does_ come, it is usually immutable. I can't be certain, because I haven't spoken with him, but I believe that Emmett experienced a change in his perceptions when Rosalie reacted to your call. She said some fairly terrible things, and he just…snapped. I saw it happen, Bella." Alice was lost in her thoughts now, staring blankly at the wall in front of her. "He looked like he didn't even recognize her for a second, and then he just looked disgusted. He turned his back to her completely and began discussing whether or not intervention on your pregnancy was necessary. It was like he just didn't know her anymore. When she left, she intended for him to follow her, but he had already decided not to. I saw her in Denali, waiting for him until it was apparent that he wasn't coming for her, and then going nomad. Now I only see flashes of her, which makes me just slightly suspicious. She's angry at all of us, and she knows exactly how my visions work. I don't know what to think, but we are prepared for anything she might attempt."

"What do you think she's going to do?" I asked, fear rising in my voice.

"Honestly, nothing. She knows that we are all strong fighters, and that we will all fight for you and your child. She also has too much pride to come back here and face Emmett, knowing that he no longer wants her. I think that we've seen the last of Rosalie for a very, very long time."

Somehow, I didn't believe her, but I didn't say anything. I just got out of the bath and dressed, feigning interest in my girls' day with Alice and Esme.

**Emmett POV**

Since we were already pretending to hunt, we figured that we might as well go ahead and do it. We dropped off the vans and picked up a Lincoln Navigator and a Mercedes just like the one Carlisle already had. Definitely a creature of habit, Carlisle.

I knew that he and Jasper wanted to talk to me, I could tell by the way they were acting. Carlisle and I had already cleared the air about Rosalie, so I figured it was something else.

After we hunted, Carlisle dropped the bomb on me.

Alice had a nasty vision, and they needed to discuss it with me.

My first thought was Bella, even though I knew that Alice couldn't see much of her anymore. I was _so_ not expecting what was really going on.

Apparently Alice had been learning to cook when she almost dropped the little pink laptop Jasper had given her for their last anniversary. Jasper said she just went blank, and then got _pissed._

"Emmett, I need you to prepare yourself for what Jasper is going to tell you. It's extremely unpleasant, and we have to decide on a course of action quickly. " He looked like someone had just broken his heart, and I knew right then that Rosalie was up to some kind of fuckery.

Jasper took a deep breath, and started fucking with my emotions, trying to make me calm. I didn't bother telling him that I was already calm; Jasper's got his own way of doing things, and it's best to just go along with them.

"Last night, Alice saw Rosalie. She was standing in the trees behind Charlie Swan's house, and her eyes were red."

I wish I could say that I took it in stride, or that I didn't freak out. That would be a fucking lie, though. I went ballistic. I smashed a few trees, let out some serious he-man growls, and just generally had a goddamned nervous breakdown. I guess Jasper knew I needed it, because he didn't even try to calm me down. He just let me get it all out of my system and then asked me to sit down when I was done.

Carlisle looked at me with about as much pity as I've ever seen, and that made me feel like shit for letting him down. I knew he would want me to be all stoic and shit, like he is. So I sat my big ass down on a tree I'd just turned over, and put my hands over my face.

"Emmett," Carlisle said gently, "We have to decide how to proceed. None of us can leave to reason with her; our responsibility lies with Bella right now. " He looked like he was trying to reason with _me_ more than anything else.

"Of course we can't leave, damn it! We've got to stay here with Bella! Besides, there is no _reasoning_ with Rosalie Hale. If anybody knows that, it's you. You've been trying to reason with that unholy bitch since you turned her." I guess Carlisle hadn't gotten around to telling Jasper the extent of my issues with Rosalie, because he just looked _scandalized._ Like I'd punched a kitten or something. "Why can't you just sic those fucking dogs on her? Isn't that what they do? Take out rogue vampires that are a menace to the humans in the area? Fuck, Carlisle! We can't let her just kill Charlie because of what I've done!" And I guess I didn't realize it until I said it, but it all came crashing down on me right then. This wasn't just because Bella was pregnant; this was because I had defended her. Because I hadn't chased Rosalie up to Denali and begged her to leave with me. If she killed Charlie, it would be as much my fault as it would be if I'd done it myself.

"The shape shifters? You would be willing to resign her to that fate?" Jasper still looked shocked, like he couldn't believe what I was saying.

"Damn straight! She's going around killing people, doing everything that Carlisle has worked against for all of these years. We can't sit back and let her! Carlisle," I turned to look at him, hoping that I didn't look as freaked out as I felt, "you've got to call Sam Uley. Tell him that Rosalie isn't under our protection anymore, and that she's going to be on his turf, hunting, very soon. Please. _Please._"


	9. Chapter 9 A Departure Imminent

_Chapter 9: A Departure Imminent_

**Carlisle POV**

My son was right, though it wounded me more deeply than I could have ever believed possible to admit it.

The only sensible course of action was to call Sam Uley, effectively killing my first daughter.

The only way that I was assured of locating Sam was to call the Ateara's gift shop, the social hub of the La Push reservation. On the third ring, a woman answered the phone. I recognized her voice as that of Embry Call's mother, and remembered that she didn't know of her son's secret, or the secret of the tribe.

"Hello, I'm looking for Sam Uley. I understand that he is frequently in the shop, and that calling there is the best possible way for one to reach him. Would you happen to know where he is?"

"_Sam? Sam Uley, you said? Yeah, he's right outside. Hold on a sec, I'll go get him."_

There was a muffled _thunk_ as the receiver was placed on the counter top, and then the sound of a creaking door with bells hanging on it being opened.

"_This is Sam Uley. Who is this?"_

"Sam, this is Dr. Carlisle Cullen. I know that I'm the last person you wish to speak to, but we have very urgent business to discuss, and I assume that you would rather not have this discussion within earshot of Ms. Call. This is regarding a potential breach of the treaty."

_Silence._

"Sam?"

"_I'm thinking, Dr. Cullen. You say that this is about our agreement?"_

"Yes, Sam. It is imperative that you listen to me."

"_Give me a number where I can reach you. We'll be calling you as soon as I get to the Blacks' house."_

I repeated the number twice, and then disconnected the call.

_Oh, Rosalie. What have you done?_

**Sam POV**

_Damn it._ Carlisle Cullen. I tore over to Billy's house human, thanking God that Jacob had taken off again after that god-awful wedding. For the first time since the loss of my brother, I felt grateful. The only breach to the treaty that I could foresee was the changing of Bella Swan, and I knew that it would send Jacob over the edge. The only way to handle the coming discussion was to approach some of the Elders, get the specifics on what Dr. Cullen had to say, and then decide what to do from there. I didn't want to involve the rest of the pack, because they weren't as capable of shielding their thoughts as I was. If at all possible, I wanted to keep this from Jacob.

After I rounded up Old Quil and Sue, we went up to Billy's place and I tried to explain what happened.

"I was at the store today," I began, "when Dr. Cullen called, looking for me. He said that he needed to discuss a 'possible breach of the treaty.' We all know that there's only one thing that can mean: Bella must be ready." I looked around the room, and saw the sadness in their eyes that mirrored my own. "I feel that there is nothing we can do to prevent this breach, and that an attempt to destroy the strong coven would be a waste of the lives of some of our young Brothers and Sisters. I am in favor of allowing the change of Bella Swan, contingent upon their moving far away before it's done."

Three heads bobbed up and down, though Billy looked sick about it. He looked up at me, and the anger in his eyes almost caused me to take a step back. "Bella was like a daughter to me. The thought of sending family to destroy family is not one that I am comfortable with. She has made her choice, and I think it would be unwise to attack based on that choice. It breaks my heart to say it, but I agree with you, Sam."

Sue looked thoughtful, meeting my eyes for a moment. "Yes, I agree with you both. Seth seems to think a great deal of this particular group, and he has often argued that Bella's choice should be her own. The treaty was created to protect unsuspecting humans from being killed or turned against their will. In Bella's case, this does not apply. I, too, believe that we should stand aside."

"I'm not agreeing with you because I feel this was a choice that Bella made. I believe that girl is under a spell, just as sure as the sky is blue. But I do agree that sending our young men and women to the slaughter is a bad idea, and for that, I will agree to stand aside as well." Old Quil looked shamefaced at his admittance that the coven could hurt our numbers, but he knew it was true. None of us were eager to lose a member of our family.

I met each pair of eyes again before continuing, "Dr. Cullen is waiting for our call. I will return it, but first I would like to say that I have made the decision to keep this development from the rest of the pack. I see no need to hurt one of our own with knowledge that he can not change, that can only wound him. Billy, I will be shielding my thoughts when I run. I don't want Jacob to ever know that we've had this discussion. Ever."

He nodded, and I picked up the telephone.

"_Hello, Dr. Cullen speaking."_

"Dr. Cullen, we have made our decision. We are aware that the coming breach is the turning of Bella, and we have agreed to stand aside and let her make her own poor decisions. This will not affect the treaty; it will still stand."

"_Thank you Sam. I will definitely keep that in mind, but that is not why I called. At the moment, Bella is still human. The problem is my…daughter. Rosalie."_

"The blonde?"

"_Yes. She's taken some recent developments in the family badly, and Alice, my daughter with the ability of second sight, has seen her in a rather shocking vision."_

"Go on."

"_In Alice's vision, Rosalie is standing in the forest behind the Swan house, and her eyes are red. The redness of her eyes is an indicator of diet, as you are aware. I called to let you know that she is coming, and she will be hunting. She is no longer under the protection of the Cullen family, or the treaty. I know that I am in no position to ask you for a favor, but I beg of you: please do not allow her to harm Chief Swan. Stop her, please. By any means necessary."_

"Do you realize what you're asking? There is only one way that we will stop her."

I heard a deep sigh on the other end of the line. _"Yes, Sam. I know."_

**Carlisle POV**

I sent Emmett and Jasper ahead of me, telling them that I would be following soon. When I was assured of their absence, I walked into the forest and uprooted a small tree, screaming at the top of my voice, just as Emmett had before me. I didn't like to show my less civilized tendencies in front of my family, but the loss of Rosalie pained me in a way that I was simply not equipped to deal with.

She would hunt Charlie Swan, and the Quileutes were forewarned. She would hunt him, and she would die.

**Emmett POV**

We all thought it was best to keep Rosalie's bullshit from Bella; she was already in a rough position. Adding anything else to the mix would just be a shame.

Jasper let me get my anger out, driving around in circles until I cooled off. At first, I guess he thought I was mad at myself, but I think he finally got the hint when I kept trying to come up with new and inventive ways to insult my wife.

"Emmett, you realize that we have signed her death warrant, right? She will die, now. How can you be so unaffected by that?"

"_She's not my mate!_ She's not, okay? She's not coming back, I'm not going after her, I don't want her. She's not my mate." I kept looking for just a hint of some kind of pain or regret, but there was nothing. Just relief that she was gone. Maybe, if she hadn't decided to fucking kill Charlie, I would have been able to forgive her one day. We would never be as close as were, I could never love her again, but I might have been able to stand the thought of her presence eventually.

It didn't help things that I was so worried about how to keep Bella from knowing something was up. She might not ever know _what,_ but she'd definitely figure out that something wasn't kosher. Smart as a whip, not much got past Bella. Human or not, she was quick. So I just kept taking deep breaths, until I felt like I had it all together.

"Jazz, I'm sorry. I know you don't understand, loving Alice the way that you do. But you know how things have been with us… it's not that I want her to die. I just don't see any other way to keep Charlie alive, and I can't live with the guilt if something happens to him because I didn't turn tail and run to Rose when she snapped her fucking fingers. What else could I do?" I looked down at my hands, knowing that I could tear her apart with them, if I needed to. Knowing that scared the shit out of me.

**Bella POV**

"Bella, darling. How are you feeling?" The concern in Esme's eyes, though ever-present, was always touching.

"I feel great. Let's talk!" I filled my voice with false brightness, knowing that it wasn't fooling them. Thankfully, they didn't call me on it. I just hoped that, if I played my cards right, I might figure out what was going on. Alice led me over to the couch, and I resisted the urge to shake her off. It wasn't that I didn't appreciate the gesture, it just made me uncomfortable to always be the weak one. Swallowing my pride and realizing that I needed the help, regardless of whether or not I wanted it, I allowed Alice to steer me. As I settled in, she folded herself sinuously into the floor at my feet. For the millionth time, I wondered if I would have that sort of grace when I was changed. Esme sank gracefully into the chair across me, smiling.

"So, what do you want? Boy? Girl?" Alice looked at me with eagerness, and I could tell that it was at least partially genuine. They did have hope for me, after all.

"Hmm… I don't know. I haven't decided. I've been calling it a "him," but obviously, I can't be sure. Either one would be wonderful. It's still overwhelming to think about it; I suppose it's even that way for women who are under the normal time table, though."

Esme nodded before saying thoughtfully, "Yes, it was like that for me. The knowledge of my pregnancy was the catalyst I needed to leave my horrible husband, but he still didn't feel real to me until I felt him moving; then, he was a tiny stranger. When I saw his face, I felt like I had known him all of my life. Before that, it was a bit disconcerting at times." A flash of sadness passed over her face, and I felt my face heat with embarrassment at causing her to relive her human traumas. "The memories are faint, Bella. They aren't as painful to recall as they are difficult. You'll see. Have you thought of any names you're particularly fond of?"

"Well," I started, nervously. I wasn't sure how they would receive the name I had planned, in the event of a son. "I think, if it's a boy, I would like to name him Edward Jacob. Jake was a very important part of my life, and I feel like it's only fair for him to be remembered when I… can't remember him so well anymore." Esme smiled reassuringly at me.

"Of course, dear. That's a wonderful name. What if it's a girl, though? Have you chosen anything?"

"Renesmee Carlie. Like all four of her grandparents. My new family and my human one." Esme looked so flattered and proud that it made my heart feel like it was swelling. She rose, and walked at human speed over to where I was sitting. She extended her hand towards my abdomen, pausing before she reached it.

"May I?" The love and eagerness on in her expression was so complete, I knew that everything would be okay, somehow.

"Of course," I whispered, not trusting my voice to be found properly. She lightly brushed the tips of her fingers over my stomach, and cooed.

"Hello, baby. You are very, very loved." At the sound of her voice, the baby moved within me, more gently this time than normal. I knew that, if her eyes could fill with tears, they would. Alice looked up at me with wonder, and I grabbed her thin wrist.

"Quick, Aunt Alice! He or she is moving."

Alice placed her hand on my stomach and smiled. "I wish I could see, Bella. I don't like the pronoun game!" We all laughed, and then the door opened. Emmett was the first one inside, and, in a flash, he was sitting by my side. Without thinking, I grabbed his large hand and placed it alongside Esme's, where Alice's had been.

"Whoa! It's moving, Bells!"

I didn't even flinch when he used Jake and Charlie's nickname for me.

**Emmett POV**

_Keep it cool keep it cool Bella needs you to keep it together_

I jumped out of the car and ran up to the door, knowing that I would calm down a little just seeing her. I was finally starting to understand why Eddie used to get so anxious when they were apart in the beginning… so much changed with her so quickly, and it could all go south any minute. Sure, she was tough, but still. She _was_ only human.

She was all propped up on the couch, and she looked like pregnant ladies that I'd seen on TV. She was all glowy, and happy looking. Esme had one hand on her stomach, and Alice was just pulling hers away. I sat down next to her, trying to figure out what was going on when she grabbed my hand in her tiny, hot one and placed it on her warm stomach.

_Something fucking moved in there._ Sure, that's what I figured was going on, but it was bizarre and a little unsettling all the same. But Bella just looked so happy… there was no way I could let her know I was a little weirded out.

"Whoa! It's moving, Bells!" _Shit._ That pup called her that. Her _dad_ called her that. Here she was, trying to let go of her humanity, and I'd just thrown it in her face. She didn't even stop smiling, though. She just sort of bounced on the couch a little and squealed.

"It's been moving for a while now, but this is the first time anyone has been able to feel it but me!"

She was so excited, I couldn't even remember what I was so weirded out about before. I just tilted my head kinda towards her belly. I looked up at her with Mischievous and Endearing Look #12, and said "Go Gators!" at the baby. If we were gonna have a kid around the house, I figured I should start its education as soon as possible.

I forgot to think about Rose.

**Carlisle POV**

The scene of happiness and familial contentment in my home was as saddening as it was beautiful. A part of my family was soon to be forever gone, and there was nothing I could do to save her. Determined to keep myself calm for the sake of my youngest, most fragile daughter, I smiled.

"Carlisle, darling! Bella has chosen the most beautiful name for the child, should it be a girl." Her face was so radiant with happiness, it was hard for me to hold on to my own sadness. "Renesmee Carlie Cullen. For each of the child's grandparents."

The swell of pride that overtook me was shocking. In the midst of all the turmoil and worry, I had forgotten to think about the fact that, at twenty-three years old, I would soon be a grandfather.


	10. Chapter 10 An Ending and a Beginning

_Chapter 10_ – An End and a Beginning

**Rosalie POV**

I deliberately kept my plans quiet, never making any decisions. If anyone knew how Alice's visions worked, it was me.

I never hated Bella, I only envied her so that it was sometimes difficult to breathe. Beautiful in a simple, calm way that was so unlike my own beauty... "Ostentatious," Edward had always called me, and my things. Clean and quiet, Bella had the sort of understated attractiveness that would never be merely a defining characteristic; she could be known for her intellect or, I had to admit, for her goodness. The human men around her flocked to her, giving her ample opportunities for the sort of life that I had so desired for all of my stretched and elongated half-life. Never quite alive and certainly not dead, I was permanently captured in a sort of limbo of Carlisle Cullen's making. The despair that I had endured for so many years had finally boiled over with the news of her pregnancy. What else could that human take from me?

Because of her, Emmett no longer wanted me. My family hadn't fought to keep me with them. They'd all chosen Bella over me, helping her to make _my_ most cherished dream come true. Without a mate, without a family, I finally understood Edward's desperation. I would not be so stupid as to involve the Volturi, though.

With nothing left to live for, I made a concrete decision, knowing Alice would see. She would see, and they would literally throw me to the wolves. Perhaps, if I was lucky, they would find me before I had to follow through with the decision to kill Bella's father.

**Sam POV**

We tightened the patrols around Charlie's place, and widened the perimeter to include the lands covered by the original treaty. If the Cullens were gone, and the blonde was separated from them, she might decide to go back to the only home she had in the area, but since she was no longer protected, I put some bodies there. I thought she might want to do whatever it is that bloodsuckers do before they go in for the kill, and I didn't want her to have the chance to even get close to Forks. If she were pissed enough to kill Charlie, that might not be the only human she'd go after. The fortuneteller said her eyes were red; she didn't say that she was going to stop at one.

In the interest of communicating with the pack, I could not hide the new developments. I could only hope that Jacob was tuning us out; we wouldn't need him to take out one leech, with a pack as big as ours, and knowing that we were having to take out a renegade Cullen might be enough to send him over the edge. In the interest of protecting my absent brother, I could only hope that his wolf instincts would keep his mind safe from the mission before us. Out of a respect for my missing second-in-command, I left his two closest and most trusted friends to patrol the expanse of land behind Charlie's house... the place where I knew Jacob himself would want to be, were he with us.

**Embry POV**

I was outside Charlie's when my fuckin' nose started to burn and my hair started to stand on end. Quil was on the other side of the woods, because the fortunetelling bloodsucker didn't tell us where that damned blonde would be, just that she'd be in the woods. When he heard me sound the alarm, he started making a beeline for me, but I knew he wasn't going to get there in time to take her out.

It was so easy, I could have fuckin' sworn she _wanted_ me to catch her. The bitch didn't flinch, didn't run, didn't do anything to defend herself. By the time Quil got there, the only thing left to do was to burn the pieces, and hope Charlie and his neighbors wouldn't wonder about the smell.

While I was sitting there, watching the bloodsucker burn and thinking about how much I missed Jake, I heard him clear as day.

_Thanks._

I knew what he meant. One Cullen down; maybe we could get them all before the fuckers got Bella.

**Carlisle POV**

My family and I were unloading the truck when the phone in my pocket chirped. I looked down at the display, and recognized the number as Billy Black's.

"Sam?"

"_She was in the woods, Dr. Cullen. Behind the house, just like you said. We protected Charlie."_

"And your family?"

"_Is safe. We suffered no injuries or losses. I'm sorry I can't say the same for your family."_ Even with the age-old enmity between our species, he sounded truly regretful for the choices that had led Rosalie to her death, or at the very least, for the grief it would cause us. I could only hope that fighting alongside one another against the newborns had forged a bond between us that could withstand the defection of my wayward daughter.

"Thank you." I ended the call, unable to speak or move for a moment. Flashes of a different, less abrasive Rosalie filled my mind; the Rosalie that she had been before her jealousy of Bella had made her into something to be feared and ultimately slaughtered to protect an innocent... _tinkering with her BMW, a gift from me that had caused her eyes to light up...perching on the other side of a piano bench, adding complex harmonies to one of Edward's tunes... laughing._

I looked at my family, and nodded. Immediately there was sadness in all of their eyes, except for Bella and Emmett, who were busy arguing over whether or not he should juggle three large boxes full of her belongings. Oblivious to us, they laughed and joked so that I could not bear to break their focus on one another's happiness. For the first time since the departure of their mates, my son and my daughter were almost normal. Instead of pretending to live for the sake of our family, Bella was truly enjoying herself.

When Emmett turned to me, his face full of joy, I bowed my head. When I looked up to meet his eyes again, I was shocked to only find vengeance and relief there. He gathered Bella to him in a way that merely seemed playful to her, and he kissed the top of her head. Batting at him ineffectually with one hand and cradling her very large abdomen with the other, she wasn't aware of what had passed between us.

**Emmett POV**

Maybe it made me an asshole, but when Carlisle let me know Rosalie was dead, I was only glad the whole mess was over. Charlie was safe, Bella was safe… because I hadn't been convinced that Rose was going to go gently in to that dark night, see what I'm saying? I figured she'd take out half the pack, maybe even get to him before they found her. Even though I hated to admit it, Rosalie was a tough fucking cookie, so the relief I felt was fierce. That's the only way that I can describe it. I had to remind myself to be gentle when I pulled Bella to me, because I was still pretty pissed that Rose had pulled such a fucked up stunt in the first place.

For somebody so perceptive, Bella didn't even notice anything was going on. She was still slapping at me and trying to convince me to put her shit down. I wondered when we would tell her, and made the decision right there that nobody was going to tell her shit until her ordeal was over. When she'd been changed, when her human memories were faded and a big emotional scene couldn't kill her, then I'd let them tell her. But I'd tear any one of them limb from limb before I let them tell her before then. So fast that she couldn't hear me, I let them know that. Everyone sort of looked up, then down… just enough to let me know that they got my drift and weren't going to cause any damn problems.

I was sorry for my family. Man, they looked all types of fucked up for a second. I felt worst for Jazz, trying to suck all the grief up and still keep sending out the happy vibe shit we had before the phone rang.

****

After we got all the shit unpacked and hung up, Bella started looking rough. Her eyes were all black underneath, and her skin had gone even more pale. I packed her off to bed, but not before I told Carlisle to start thinking about his delivery plan. I had noticed that, every day, Bella had less and less time that she could stand to be awake. The littlest things started tiring her out, so I figured she was getting close. The thought of it made me want to throw up, even though I couldn't.

Jazz had figured out that the half human kids, according to the legends, chewed their way out. After being thoroughly grossed out, I ran down to Carlisle and told him what we'd found, and that he'd better get something else in line. No way would Bella live through that!

While the family was in Carlisle's office, talking about the best way to get on with things, I hung out with Bells. I'd been calling her that more and more lately, and she seemed to like it. Maybe that was a good sign… acceptance and all that. Anyway, I was sitting on the edge of her bed the day that we finished putting the stuff away, waiting for her to fall asleep when she opened her eyes and looked up at me.

"Emmett?" Her voice even sounded rough.

"What's up, Half-pint?" She smiled at the nickname, even though she didn't have a clue where it came from. I made a mental note to tell her, after she was changed. It probably wouldn't go over well, with her newborn temper, and that might be funny.

"Are you afraid? It's getting close now, I can feel it." Her eyes were _huge_ when she said it, too. "What if something happens?"

"Hey, now! None of that. We've promised everybody too many times that you'd be fine. Can't make a liar out of me, Half-pint. I've got enough problems here. " I winked at her, hoping that it would cover my real feelings. Because, yeah, I was fucking terrified. Right then, she screamed and grabbed her side, and I did the only thing I could think of: I screamed for Carlisle.

****

One taped-up rib later, Bella was out cold on the couch. She wouldn't sleep in her bed because it was the middle of the day, and she didn't want things to be out of the ordinary. She didn't even want to sleep on the couch, but I guess the day had taken enough out of her that she couldn't help it. After I was sure she was out, we all sat down at the dining room table.

Carlisle looked a little uncomfortable, which isn't something you see every day. "Emmett, I've had an idea about the delivery. We have established that the amniotic sac is made of a material akin to that of our skin, and that these children tear their way out of the womb. I have a very distasteful gift that Aro gave me long ago, that I have been unable to do away with. Now, I have the suspicion that it may prove to be quite useful."

I perked right up then. I'd felt like I was choking since the rib incident, even though I knew that I couldn't choke. "What are you talking about?"

"When Aro hunted the Children of the Moon in Siberia, he sent me a… rather grisly souvenir. The claw of one of the creatures. They are, like the shape shifters in La Push, capable of penetrating our skin in a way that no blade ever could. My proposal is that we use it as a sort of scalpel, in order to perform a C-section before the child has the inclination to… remove itself. I have sterilized it, removing any traces of bacteria or debris, and think that it would be ideal for the situation that we are in. By my calculations, we can safely remove the child in another twenty-four hours. At the rate of gestation, it will most likely be capable of sustaining itself at that point. " He looked at me like he was waiting for my permission, which kind of weirded me out. Since when did I speak for Bella? Okay, maybe I had been, but I was just saying the things that she would have said herself, if she'd known everything that was going on. And just like every time before, I knew that Bella would say that we should do it.

"Ok, man. I got you. Let's do it. When she wakes up, I'll ask her, but I'm sure she'll be all for it. I guess you're gonna change her right after?"

He nodded. "Yes, that's the best course of action. When she awakens, I think that it would be best if you were the one to approach her with the news. She is more comfortable with you than anyone else, save perhaps Alice. But the two of you have bonded over the child in a way that Alice has not been able to. I think it would be best if you spoke with her."

About that time, I heard her scratchy little voice down the hall. "Emmett? Alice? Where is everybody?"

**Edward POV**

After several days of searching, I had finally unearthed the legends of the _Libishomen's_ spawn. The creatures used their teeth to escape the womb, killing their mothers in the process, but not before breaking most of their bones and mutilating them with their inhuman strength. I was frantic with worry, knowing that the date of Bella's delivery must be drawing near. I had wasted so much time, trying to find the source of the legends that Bella might very well have been dead by the time I returned. I boarded the first evening flight back to the United States, and arranged for a rental vehicle to be waiting at the airport.

I would have to hurry back, and to get that thing out of her before it killed her. I would fight every member of my family, if necessary. With my advantages, they would not be able to stop me; I would not make the mistake I had made before of not listening closely, or of counting on backup. This would be a solitary mission, but it was one I had no choice but to undertake. By my calculations, I could be in Ithaca withing twenty-four hours, if I waited for Nahuel and Huilen to prepare for the journey. With them in tow, I hoped I could convince my family of the danger Bella was in; Nahuel was living proof that the hybrid children were fatal to their human mothers.

I would have to kill my own child, before it killed my wife.

**Bella POV**

When I woke up on the couch, I was alone.

"Emmett? Alice? Where is everybody?" The sound of my own voice was unfamiliar, it was so rough and painful. For the past two days, I'd been trying to keep the injuries that my little nudger was inflicting on me to myself. I knew the baby couldn't help it, and that it would only worry everyone if I told them. When a kick had broken one of my ribs, though, I couldn't help screaming. I heard a cracking noise come from deep inside me, and then it felt like something was stabbing me, making it hard to breathe. I knew that, if I couldn't breathe, the baby couldn't, so the fear and the pain mingled until I was almost hysterical. Carlisle had checked it out and taped it up, barely hiding the strain on his face as he did. Something about his expression reminded me of the time that he stitched up my arm on my birthday. Solemn, worried, and trying hard not to appear that way.

As soon as I spoke, the room was filled with the bodies of my family. Alice was standing in the doorway, as far from me as she could be. As the baby grew, looking at or being near me had become more and more painful for her, until we were very rarely in the same room. It pained me to be separated from my best friend, but knowing that my very presence hurt her kept me from talking about it.

Emmett sat down next to me, and put his cold arm around me. More and more over time, Emmett and I had fallen into such a casually affectionate relationship that I had begin to wonder if Edward's control was really so exceptional; Emmett never seemed tempted to hurt me, only to keep me safe. Or perhaps his control was on a par with Edward and Carlisle's; it made me believe that, with the proper mindset, maybe I could have a modicum of control as a newborn.

"Bells, listen. We've been talking, and Carlisle has an idea. I told them that you'd probably be okay with it, but I want to make sure. Carlisle knows a way to do a C-section, to keep the baby from hurting you too much... the only thing is, we've gotta do it tomorrow. The baby will be ready by then, and it'll keep you from being in more danger than you have to be. We're gonna give you an epidural thing, like they do for normal pregnancies so you can be awake to see the baby, but we think it's probably best if we turn you the second we get the baby out. Is that all cool with you? I know it's a lot to think about, but we don't have a lot of time. Jasper has done some research, and we kinda have to get it out before it decides to come out on its own. I'm not gonna give you all the gory details, I'll just say that we probably can't save you if we wait for that."

I just stared at him for a minute, knowing that minute seemed a lot longer to them than it did to me. So soon? I had just gotten used to the idea that there was a person inside of me; if we did it their way, I wouldn't even get a chance to know that person for the first few days of its life because I'd be burning and fighting my way through the change. On the other hand, if I didn't do it that way, I might miss _every_ day of my baby's life.

"Okay. If Carlisle thinks it's best to do it his way, that's probably what I should do." I paused, nervous about the request I had. "Emmett?" He had been looking at Carlisle, waiting for his response, but he looked back to me so quickly that I didn't see the motion, only the result.

"What's up, Bells?"

"Will you... um... could you be with me while I change? I'm... scared." I felt the darn tears starting up again, but I fought them. I was tired of being the weak link in a family full of the strongest beings on the planet.

Emmett's face turned softer and sweeter than I'd ever seen, without a trace of his normal joking manner. "I don't know, Bella. You'll be bleeding after the surgery, and I..."

I felt my face fall. Of course he couldn't be with me. I'd be covered in blood. I nodded, but before I could speak, he pulled himself up to his full height and squared his shoulders. "Sure, Half-pint. I'll be right there with you, Kiddo. I can take it. I'm the toughest vampire here. What's a little blood?" He waggled his eyebrows at me, and smiled. Suddenly, I knew that everything was going to be okay.

* * *

The next day passed in a blur, mostly because I slept through the biggest chunk of it. Alice had swallowed her pain and showed me the crib she'd picked out for the baby, just in case it slept; she'd ordered a pink layette and a blue one, stating that she hated "stupid pastel baby yellow." Esme fussed over me, feeding me every time I opened my eyes and keeping me wrapped in blankets when I was cold or curled against her body or Emmett's when I was running the fever that I seemed to have suddenly acquired.

Carlisle spent most of his time in his office, probably preparing himself for the first-ever controlled hybrid birth. Emmett and Jasper hunted twice that day, hoping to build up Emmett's resistance to my blood.

When the time came, Esme carried me up the stairs to the office where Carlisle was waiting. Just like Emmett had promised, before he did anything else, Carlisle started an epidural. When my legs went numb, I started to giggle hysterically, half to cover my fear and half because I was giddy with anticipation. Emmett and I had agreed that it was best for him to stay downstairs until after the worst was over; making him endure the spilling of my blood was even too selfish for me. I could hear him pacing downstairs, just like the expectant fathers that I had seen in old movies. That made me start giggling all over again, until Esme took my hand.

"Bella, we're ready to begin."

**Esme POV**

Bella's anxiety was apparent, especially when the epidural caused her lower half to become numb. She laughed with a sort of mania that made me worry for her current state of mind, but I knew that her defense mechanisms were protecting her from the reality that she was about to meet her child for only a moment before it was swept away from her while she suffered near-unbearable pain. I remembered the pain of my own transformation, and winced out of sympathy for what she was about to endure.

My darling Carlisle removed the claw of the Child of the Moon from the autoclave he'd used to sterilize it for the last time, and began to explain his procedure to Bella.

"Bella, this is the only thing other than vampire teeth that will penetrate the amniotic sac." I was grateful to realize that he hadn't told her what it was; because of her love for Jacob Black, she was likely to find it unendurable. "I'm going to use it as a sort of scalpel, and remove the child." He pinched her leg to ascertain that the anesthesia was effective, and then began to open her abdomen.

The smell of her blood was beautiful and horrible, all at once. Beautiful because it was floral and appetizing, horrible because of how very appealing it was. It fell in a mesmerizing ribbon across her mottled stomach, beading in some places and rolling down her skin in others. I swallowed hard, reminding myself that this was my daughter. _She's my daughter I have promised Edward that I would keep her safe this is my daughter thisismydaughter thisismydaughter._ I wrenched my attention back to her terrified face, and began to smooth her hair back from where it was clinging to her sweat-drenched forehead.

"It's going to be fine, Bella." I whispered. "Carlisle is so smart, so patient. He'll take good care of you, dear." She nodded at me, and it seemed that she didn't doubt him.

"Will you tell me whether it's a boy or a girl before you change me? Will you let me hold my bab-" There was a sudden, loud crack that cut off her words, and her legs twitched before they went limp.

"Her spine!" Carlisle said, horrified. As he began to work faster, I snatched one of the clean cloths off of the cart next to him to wipe away the blood that had pooled at the corners of her mouth, and shouted for Carlisle's attention as I pulled her up into a seated position, hoping to clear her airway. He acknowledged my struggle and pulled his hands away long enough for me to get her upright, and then there was a horrible squealing, wrenching noise that reminded me of the sound of the newborns being torn apart. Suddenly, I heard a whisper.

"Renesmee."

I looked at my husband and saw the adoration on his face. For a moment, all of the fear and anxiety was swept away, and all I could feel was love for the tiny bundle before me. As he handed her to me, I caught a glimpse of a beautiful face, white under the stain of her mother's blood, with wide open, deep brown eyes. I placed the child on Bella's chest, knowing that she had but a moment to savor before we had to take the child away. As the baby burrowed into Bella's chest, I heard a sharp gasp and saw more blood running down her chest. The baby had bitten her, so I swept it away and turned, wondering where I could take Renesmee so that I could help my husband as he struggled over Bella's rapidly fading body. In the doorway was Emmett, frantic with fear.

"Esme, go! I can help him, I've got it under control! Take the baby, make sure the baby is safe!"

He blew past me in a blur too fast for even my excellent eyes, and took my place at Bella's side.

"Son, you're going to have to bite her. I've got to get this bleeding stanched, or she's just going to lose the venom. Will you be able to stop yourself?"


	11. Chapter 11 Burning

_Chapter Eleven - Burning_

**Emmett POV**

I couldn't stay downstairs. I knew I was supposed to, but I just couldn't do it. I was wandering around, listening for all I was worth when I heard this tiny cracking noise, and Carlisle talking about Half-pint's spine. I tore up the stairs like a bat out of hell, terrified that she was going to die.

_You promised me, Bella. Youpromisedyoupromised__**youpromised.**_

I stood in the doorway, looking at Carlisle. He was holding this little-bitty bloody thing, and Esme was reaching for it. I could still hear Bella's heart, but it wasn't very strong and her breathing sounded all fucked up. Then the kid bit Bella, and Esme started looking around, like she was looking for a place to put the baby or something.

The blood didn't even register, I was so freaked out. I just knew that I _had_ to help Carlisle. I couldn't let Bella die. So I sent Esme downstairs with the baby, knowing that it needed looking over too, and I went right over to Half-pint's side.

Then Carlisle told me I would have to bite her, and I felt the venom pooling in my mouth. How the fuck was I supposed to _bite_ her? It went against everything I'd told myself from the beginning: "don't bite Bella, don't bite Bella." It was like one of those mantra things. But I knew that she was going to die, and I knew that I would go insane if she did. So I leaned in, and I bit.

Her blood was beautiful. Not like the woman hanging her laundry in Tennessee, but not like anything else I'd ever tasted, either. I knew that I had to stop, knew that she'd already lost too much when I heard Carlisle.

"Emmett! Emmett, stop! You have to control yourself! Get both of her wrists to speed the venom through at the pulse points, but for God's sake, son, stop. It's easier if you don't drink, only bite."

The sound of his voice was enough to snap me back into reality, and I pulled away. I did what he told me to, and it was easier to stop if I didn't give the blood time to get into my mouth. I just bit and pulled away, bit and pulled away. Then I stood there, not sure what else I could do. When I looked at Carlisle, he was just standing back, looking at her too.

"What do I do now, Carlisle?" My voice didn't even sound like me. I was scared and sick with worry, and even I could tell it.

"We wait, son. All we can do is wait. Her injuries are no more extensive than Esme's were, or even your own. She should be fine." He patted me on the shoulder, all paternal and shit, and then looked me dead in the eye. "I believe that you promised Bella you would stay with her. I think she will be pleased to know that you were also the one who changed her. She will be proud of you, Emmett. As I am." Then he just walked out.

Bella's breathing was all ragged sounding, and she was shaking her hands like she was the time that James bit her; like a human would shake off a bee that stings or water that's too hot. Then she started to make this pitiful whimpering noise, and it just about broke my heart. All I could think to do was to climb on the table behind her, and pull her up so that her back was against my chest and her legs between mine. I wrapped my arms around her, being careful not to touch any of the hurt places, and started whispering nonsense things that I thought might be soothing… and I just sat. With Bella. Taking care of her like I promised.

**Edward POV**

With Huilen and Nahuel running quickly behind me, I sped up the steps and onto the porch, then burst through the door of the home that my family had fled to when I'd forced them out of Bella's life. I knew that I would never be able to feel truly comfortable there, though I hadn't been with them during that time.

When I opened the door, I was immediately aware of the sound of something fast and high, a thrumming sort of noise that permeated the downstairs. I looked in the direction that it was coming from and saw Esme sitting on the couch, holding a small pink bundle in her hands. On the couch next to her, Alice was counting tiny fingers while Carlisle leaned over the back and stroked the bundle's cheek.

_I was too late._ The monster had killed Bella already, and my family fawned over the thing! With a snarl, I whipped across the room, and ran into Jasper and Carlisle.

"Edward, Bella is alive! Emmett is with her, she is changing! Edward, stop struggling! Your wife will live, but you must calm down." Carlisle held both of my biceps in his steel grip, refusing to let me go. When the words sank in, I felt my knees give way, though I knew that, physiologically, there was no reason for them to.

"She survived?" The astonished voice from behind me reminded me that I had brought visitors. Weakly, I gestured towards them.

"Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, this is Huilen and her nephew Nahuel. Nahuel is also a hybrid, and his mother, like all of the legends state, died giving birth to him. I brought them so that I might convince you that the child was a danger to Bella's life. Obviously, I did not have enough faith in your skill, Carlisle. " I bowed my head in shame, knowing that I had hurt Nahuel by basically referring to his species as a menace, and Carlisle by doubting him. The regret and humiliation swallowed me, leaving me unable to speak another word.

In typical Esme fashion, she handed the bundle (the baby? My baby?) to Alice, and began to welcome them the best way she could after my rudeness.

"Nahuel, Huilen! What a wonderful surprise! Nahuel, I hope you don't mind, but we do have questions for you…" As she chattered on and led them to the kitchen, I found myself wandering over to Alice's side.

"Would you like to hold your daughter, Edward?" _Daughter._ I didn't have to hear her thoughts to pick out the reproach in her voice, and I could not bring myself to touch the child in her arms. She was so beautiful, so pure… and I had wanted to kill her. I was not worthy to touch her, or to call her mine.

Emmett was comforting my wife as she endured horrible pain, the rest of my family was looking after my child until Bella was well enough to mother her, and I had been wandering through the rainforest, helping not at all.

I turned and fled, hoping that Rosalie was no longer in Denali. Just like I always did when confronted with my treatment of my wife, I ran from her. This time, I was running from my whole family. I could not bear to face them.

**Alice POV**

For something that I couldn't see, Renesmee sure had made me fall in love with her. I was astonished to see that she had inherited Bella's wonderful brown eyes, and it made me feel like there was a part of the Bella I had first come to love left to us. Separated from Renesmee, I could see Bella clearly. Her new face was still a mystery to me, but I knew that she was going to survive her transition.

When Edward stormed out of the house again, I very carefully took Renesmee to the crib in Bella's room, and then I sank down into the floor.

_He wasn't coming back._

His shame and remorse over what he saw as his ultimate desertion of Bella were enough to make him too humiliated to face her again.

"Alice?" Jasper knelt beside me for the third time in as many weeks, comforting me.

"He's not coming back either, Jasper! He's gone. He went to Denali, and unless we can change his mind, he's not coming back. He's too ashamed of the way that he's treated Bella and Renesmee, and he thinks that Bella is sure to hate him when she wakes up. He can't bear to see her look at him that way, so he's gone."

Jasper looked at me in shock, and he missed a few beats before he responded. "But, Bella doesn't hate Edward. There must be a way that we can convince him."

"No, she will never hate him. But she will also never forgive him, now. If he had stayed, she would have eventually, but she's going to see this as the final and most unforgivable defection when she needs him most. For the sake of the daughter that he's left behind," I gestured towards the crib, vaguely, "and for not being strong enough to face his mistakes."

**Bella POV**

I burned. I imagined the old rituals of purification by fire; all of my imperfections were being burned away, and if I were strong enough to survive it, they would be replaced with something shining and unassailably beautiful. I could finally be strong, be a part of the family that didn't need constant protection. I felt as if I were floating upwards, in flames. _Like a phoenix,_ I thought. _I am rising, I am leaving the pain behind._

But I could feel thick bands of steel around me, keeping me tethered to the table. Somewhere above the bands was a voice, whispering to me.

"Bells, it's going to be okay. I know it hurts; it's okay to scream. Just remember that I'm here, and I'm gonna take care of you. Emmett's here."

_Emmett._ Of course. The bands of steel were his strong arms. My anchor for the whole of this mess, and now the thing keeping me tied to the earth. For him, I would be strong. For all of my family, I would not force them to suffer with me any more than I already had. I just counted my heartbeats, triumphant that I still had them, and tried to hide from the horrible boiling of my blood and the searing of my skin.

I could feel the pieces of myself that Renesmee broke knitting themselves together, becoming whole again. The fire was more intense in those places, causing me pain in ways that I'd never imagined.

"It's gonna be okay, you're gonna be fine. Just breathe, Bells. Breathe."

I realized that I had been holding my breath when he reminded me not to, but the air that I took into my lungs didn't help to cool the heat inside of them.

In my mind, I saw flashes of Renee, Charlie, Jacob, Angela… all of the things that I had loved about being human, and all of the things that I giving up for immortality and for the kind of love that was worth dying for. Worth living forever for. I saw La Push, and the fallen tree where Jacob and I had spent so many hours, doing nothing and everything. I saw the blue walls of my bedroom in Charlie's house, the yellow cabinets in the kitchen. The tiny specks of rust on the wheels of Billy's wheelchair, empty cans of Vitamin R in the garbage can. I saw football games that the pack played, and Emily working in her tiny house to keep Sam and the rest of the boys fed and happy. I saw everything.

Somewhere deep inside me, I mourned while I burned. Tears ran silently down my face, and Emmett wiped them away. I knew he thought I was crying because of my physical pain, and I made a promise to myself to never let him think otherwise. Truly, I was crying for the loss of all that I had loved before I became part of the Cullen family.

***

The hours passed like days, like weeks. I burned and writhed on the table in Emmett's arms, but he kept me safe and held me to the Earth, as unchangeable as gravity. The other members of my family drifted in and out, telling me about my daughter and about the things that I would wake up to. Alice stayed for three hours, describing the new clothes that she had for me, right down to the fabric type and the exact shade names. I knew that she was trying to distract me, and I loved her for it, regardless of how ineffectual it was.

Emmett never left my side.

***

First, the very tips of my extremities began to cool; the ends of my fingers and toes, the tip of my nose, the lobes of my ears… The fire receded slowly, but measurably, through my limbs, seeming to intensify at my chest. The whole of my torso felt charred, but I was grateful for the relief in other places. Then my shoulders and hipbones began to ease, maddening in their slowness. The inferno in my chest picked up in intensity, and my heart pounded double-time while it was incinerating.

Picking up speed, my heart suddenly felt like it was going to detach itself from its moorings. It was beating so quickly, it began to sound like one, continuous sound. Then, it stopped.

The only heat left in my body was centered in my throat, and it was worse than anything I'd felt through the rest of my transformation. The steel bands had loosened, but were still present.

_I had done it._ I had survived my husband, my daughter, my innate clumsiness and my unavoidable pull for danger.

I was immortal.


	12. Chapter 12 The Tree of Knowledge

_Chapter Twelve - The Tree of Knowledge_

**Bella POV**

Very carefully, I opened my eyes.

I gasped, completely overwhelmed by the sensory overload that sight provided. Very vaguely, I could recall Renee describing an experience she'd had with LSD before I was born, and I wondered if it were something close to what I was feeling. The planes of Esme's soft face were so sharp, so defined… On the other side of the room, I could very easily make out each of Alice's eyelashes. Jasper's scars, which had been so difficult for me to see with human eyes, were clearly contrasted against the milky white of his skin.

I truly felt as if I'd never had eyes before. There were colors that I couldn't name hovering on the edge of the prismatic spectrum that reflected from the bulb in Carlisle's study lamp. Behind and somewhere below me, I could hear the faint sounds of the television, and a fast, whirring sort of noise down the hall towards my bedroom.

_My throat._ It burned so terribly, I couldn't help pressing my fingers to it. Carlisle noted the gesture, and was the first one to speak. "Bella, Emmett is going to take you hunting now. Because it will be easy for you to become distracted, we feel it best for you to go with only one other person, so that diversions are limited. I thought you might feel most comfortable with Emmett, since he's the only person in the family whose strength comes close to yours. Remember, though… you _are_ much stronger than he is." Everyone tittered with laughter.

So did I, but the bell-like peals sounded nothing like my voice. I must have looked confused, because everyone let out another round of nervous laughter. Alice was the one to step forward, taking care to move slowly. She took my hand in hers and smiled at me.

"Bella, your voice, along with the rest of you, is a little different now. Would you like to see yourself, or would you like to hunt first? The mirrors will be here forever, so make the decision that makes you most comfortable." True to her recent form, Alice was allowing me to decide for myself what was best for me.

"Um… could I? Please? Look in the mirror, I mean. I am… curious." I shook my head quickly in confusion at the still-unfamiliar sound, and heard a happy, booming voice behind me.

"Turn around, Bella. We moved a mirror in here for you already; it's right beside me." I turned, and gasped.

Emmett's dimples were deep enough for the tip of my finger to fit in, and his golden eyes danced with undisguised glee. His curls were glossy and black, even in the harsh, artificial light of Carlisle's office. The short sleeved shirt he wore showed very clearly the thick arms, roped with muscle and sinew, bulging even more because they were crossed over his massive chest. For the second time, I thought that I had been blind before. I had seen Emmett every day for the last week, and almost every day for months before that; still, he looked almost like a stranger to me now.

He smiled a huge smile, and his eyes shifted towards the mirror. As a human, I probably wouldn't have noticed the gesture, but it was all that I needed to remind me of my original purpose. I slowly turned my eyes towards the mirror, and was bewildered by what I saw there.

My long hair looked even darker, almost as dark as Alice's or Emmett's, against the white of my skin. There was a sort of grace apparent, even when I was standing still, that let me know that my days of tripping over the pattern in a rug were over. My eyes, still the same shape and placement as before, were a shocking crimson that almost seemed to glow, they were so bright. As I stepped closer to the mirror, there were bits of myself that I could recognize that soothed me a bit. My lips, while fuller and more shapely, were still a touch unbalanced. The elfin sort of point to my chin remained, along with the delicate arch of my eyebrows that I had always secretly been proud of.

The biggest difference in me was not one of changed features, but a changed carriage. There was a strength visible in my face and bearing that I had not had in my possession before. Not just the physical strength that I was sure I had received, but an emotional strength. Something in the way I held myself and the demeanor about me spoke of immovability. Looking at myself that day, I knew that I would never be swayed or bent to another's will in the name of what they called my "own best interests." Standing before me was a woman hell bent on, and fully capable of, making her own choices.

I ripped my eyes from my reflection and looked into Emmett's. "Where is she? Where is Renesmee?" To call her my daughter was something overwhelming and difficult for me to acknowledge, but I had to see her, to hold her in my arms. Rivaling the need to drink was my need to know the person that I had given my life for.

Cautiously, Carlisle approached me. I couldn't understand why everyone was moving so slowly, until Jasper spoke.

"I feel that you are confused, Bella. If your confusion stems from our caution, it's because we're being careful not to startle you. You could very easily become… dangerous to us, if you were to be frightened and become defensive."

"But, I know you," I said, baffled by their concern. "You are my family. You would never hurt me, and I would never hurt you. I love you. All of you." The tension in the room eased palpably, as if Jasper had been controlling the mood.

With a broad smile, Carlisle handed me a pink blanket. The smell clinging to it was heavenly. "Bella, I want you to smell that blanket. If that smell is even remotely appealing to you, in terms of thirst, I need you to tell me. You do not have to be ashamed of your instincts, you only need to inform us so that we know how to proceed."

Though I could easily catch the scent from where I held the blanket, I raised it to my nose and inhaled deeply. The intoxicating scent was unlike anything I had ever experienced, but it did not smell edible.

"She smells wonderful. But I don't want to bite her… she smells like something inedible, but still delicious. Does that make sense?" The storm of sensory information and conflicting desires was causing me to be confused and slightly anxious.

"Yes, it makes perfect sense. Her blood has not been appealing to any of us, but you are a newborn…" He trailed off, unwilling to finish his sentence.

"I want to hunt, just to be on the safe side. When I return, I want to meet her." Perhaps the strength I had glimpsed in my own countenance was apparent to all of them, because no one contested my decision. Emmett only grabbed my hand in his huge one, and I was surprised to find that it did not feel cold to me, though I understood that it was only because my temperature had dropped to match his. He pulled me towards the window, and I followed him, mostly because I was beginning to sense the strength in my limbs as well, and I didn't want to injure him in any way.

He stood at the mouth of the open window, and then gave me a comical, eye-rolling grimace as he stepped over the ledge. Almost immediately, his feet were on the ground and his arms were out, ready to catch me.

"Come on, Half-pint. I'll catch you, just in case your new body is as clumsy as your old one." The laughter around me caused my eyes to narrow, and I launched myself out of the window. Instead of landing into his waiting arms, like I knew I easily could, I landed a few inches in front of him and threw my shoulder into the center of his chest. As he was falling, he grasped my arms and pulled me down with him. The laughter of my family swelled, and I jumped up quickly to plant my foot gently in his sternum, not wanting to hurt him with the power I felt coursing throughout my limbs.

"Say 'uncle,' Emmett." Instead of relenting, he took my ankle in his hand and pulled hard, sending me hurtling to the ground to land on my back beside him. As I hit the ground, I couldn't keep from rolling over and springing back to a crouching, defensive position, though I was now laughing along with them.

***

On our hunting trip, we learned that I was much, much faster than Emmett. I left him in my dust a couple of times, just to get the point across. When we finally approached a herd of deer, I felt a bit of reluctance creeping in. Knowing that my choices were Bambi or a human, I opted for the former and hoped that I would find relief from that aversion in time.

After we hunted, Emmett and I wrestled, raced, and swung from tree limbs. He made everything into a game, so that even the simple act of crossing a small river was one of staunch competition. I wondered how much of it was just his natural joyfulness and competitive nature, and how much of it was his attempt to keep me amused through and unsettling and awkward process.

When we returned to the house, Alice was waiting by the front door.

"I know you want to see Renesmee, but I want you to change out of those stained clothes. What were you doing out there, making mudpies?" She tsked at me as she led me to the bedroom, and I didn't fight her on it because I was pretty disgusting.

When she had me suitably attired in varying shades of blue, she led me downstairs. I had been staring at the crib in my room the whole time that I was changing, wondering what my little nudger was like, now that she was an actual person.

I made my way down the stairs, and was greeted by Jasper. He sent waves of calm over me that I was actually in need of; I was nervous. I hadn't had any time to prepare for motherhood, and there was a child in the next room that demanded nothing less of me.

When I walked through the door, Esme was holding the most amazing creature I had ever seen. With ringlets cascading down to her shoulders the color of her father's, and big deep brown eyes that mimicked my human ones, she reached for me. With that motion, all of my fears about motherhood fell away, and instinct took over. I bounded over to her and scooped her into my arms, feeling the scorching heat of her tiny body against my cold one. With her miniscule hands, she reached up to me and patted my face.

Just then, my mind exploded with images. _A bleeding, torn up version of me, wrapped in Emmett's arms. He looked like he was sleeping. Alice playing peekaboo; she wasn't amused. The softness of her pink bed; she liked pink. A dark-haired man holding her, telling her stories. She liked the way he laughed._

"What is she doing?" My voice rose in alarm. Who was that man?

"Ah, Bella… she has a gift. Those are her memories. She somehow transmits them through her palms. It's sort of the reverse of Aro's gift." Alice spoke gently, as if she knew the news would be alarming.

"Then who is that man?!" I was appalled at the idea of a stranger holding my child; the intimacy between them was shocking. There was another whirring noise behind me, similar to the sound of Renesmee's heart, but stronger somehow.

"I am Nahuel." The musical voice behind me had an accent I couldn't identify. I whipped around to look at him, noting that he looked human. I could smell the blood in his veins, but like Renesmee's, it was not appealing to me. "I am also a hybrid. Your… husband. He found my aunt and me in the forests of South America. He brought me here to convince you to let him take Renesmee, because I killed my own mother." A fleeting look of horror and pain flashed over his features, but was replaced by a sort of reverence when he spoke of Renesmee. She reached for me, placing her hands on my face.

_Nahuel speaking._ _"Your mother is very strong, Renesmee. I am just like you."_

"You're a hybrid," I repeated.

"Yes. I have spoken with the rest of your family, and I have answered their questions. I would be honored to do the same for a mother so strong, if you have any." A million questions ran through my new, roomier mind. I noted somewhere in it that I would have wanted to sit down to absorb the onslaught of thoughts in my old life; as a vampire, I seemed to be able to stand in one position indefinitely.

"She's grown so much, just while I was out. How…?" He smiled slightly, and nodded at me.

"She will continue to grow at an accelerated rate for seven years, at which point she will reach full maturity. I am one hundred and fifty years old. She will not race to old age, as you must fear that she will." He waited for my next question, and I saw the patience and goodness in his eyes. I liked Nahuel immensely. The relief that surged through me would have been enough to knock a human version of me off of her feet, but my new power kept me rooted firmly to the pale floorboards.

"Her diet?"

"I can survive off of human food or blood, though I greatly prefer blood. Renesmee has been subsisting on a diet of donated human blood, much like you did as you carried her. Your family has explained your lifestyle, and the doctor thinks she should be allowed to continue until she is old enough and strong enough to hunt. Her mind and cognitive abilities are extremely advanced, when compared to a human child of the same age."

Renesmee sighed and her little brow furrowed. _Uncle Jasper holding her while Grandma Esme leapt at a deer. They smelled funny. A metal cup that belonged to her; blood in it that had a faintly chemical tinge from the preservatives._ I winced in pain as she remembered the taste of blood, but held tight to her and checked my trembling.

"What's wrong, Bella?" Alice stepped forward to take Renesmee, but she wrapped her tiny arms around my neck with a shocking amount of strength. I was proud of my strong, beautiful daughter that refused to be torn from me.

"She was thinking about Jasper and Esme's hunting trip, and then coming home to a metal cup." I looked down in shame, embarrassed that my daughter's needs had stirred me, even though I felt full to the brim with the blood of the animals Emmett and I had hunted. Like he could sense my thoughts, Emmett stepped to my side and put his arm around my shoulder.

"No worries, Half-pint. You're doing really well. Hell, even I get twitchy when she eats. It used to wear me out to sit next to you while you were holding your little cup." I felt instantly better, but also apologetic.

"Oh, Emmett. I'm so sorry; I didn't even think. It must have been awful for you to sit next to me, trying to resist my blood and what I was drinking." I felt a strange pricking sensation in my eyes, but couldn't identify it. It felt similar to the sensation of tears welling up when I was human, a memory that I was dimly aware of. Thinking about my human memories reminded me of the person who was missing.

"Edward! Where is he? Hasn't anyone called him to let him know? Wait, Nahuel said that Edward brought them here… He left again?" I felt my hysteria growing, and this time I did hand Renesmee off when Nahuel reached for her. He tactfully carried her into the kitchen, murmuring about feeding her. He laughed down to her as she showed him something, and I felt another part of my mind that wasn't focused on Edward's absence thrill at the friendship they seemed to have formed.

"Bella, this probably isn't something that you need to think about right now, but I don't see any way to keep it from you." Alice's trilling voice broke into my speculations. "Edward feels very… ashamed of himself. He's afraid that you are going to hate him for not believing in you enough, for not trusting your strength to carry you through your pregnancy. He left. He didn't feel worthy of being near you, or Renesmee right now. He's in Denali; Kate called when he arrived and told us that he's holed himself up in a guestroom and is refusing to speak after explaining his presence. We had to explain everything to her… she's had two frantic Cullens show up on her doorstep this month. Carlisle told her about Renesmee, and they are overjoyed for you. They are planning a trip to meet her, as soon as you are adjusted and comfortable."

"Edward is gone? He left me? Again?!" I felt my voice rising in pitch with every syllable, along with my anger. I started to shake, and I remembered vaguely the way that Paul had looked the day that I confronted the wolves. Part of me knew that I had to control my temper, but it was more than I could do. I registered that Emmett was towing me out the front door, and I allowed him to, knowing that he probably knew better than I did what was safe for the rest of the family. I was the strongest person in the house, and I was losing my mind.

When he got me into a thicket of trees, I noticed the rest of the family standing a hundred yards away on the porch, looking like they were even a bit frightened of me. Nahuel and Renesmee were nowhere to be seen, presumably they were still in the house, and I was once again grateful for the quick bond they seemed to have forged.

Emmett, though… He stood right beside me, rubbing my shoulders. "I know it sucks, Bells. I know. He's a fucking jackass. This is what I do when my temper gets out of hand, I fuck up the trees."

I stopped shaking and looked at him in wonder. "The trees? What do you mean? You never lose your temper, unless there's a fight. Even then, you just fight… You never seem like you're particularly angry." All thoughts of "fucking up the trees," as Emmett so delicately put it, were out of my mind for the moment. Curiosity overwhelmed me. I'd been stuck to Emmett like glue for weeks as a human; those memories were the strongest of my muddy human ones. I never recalled seeing him out of control.

"Of course I lose my temper. I'm probably the most volatile person in the family; I just keep it to myself as much as I can. I laugh and smile in the house, then I come outside and I put a serious hurt on the tree population. Or boulders, or whatever else there is that won't hurt somebody else. I've had a lot of time to get myself under control. But look at you, Bells. You're already cooled off now, even if you don't know it."

I checked the biological responses. The film of red that had slipped over my eyes was gone. The trembling of my body had stopped. I was still willing to scream at the top of my lungs if only Edward were there to hear it, but I no longer wanted to rend and tear. Filled with a new kind of wonder and appreciate for Emmett, I looked at him with gratitude and affection. He had talked me down, without me even realizing it. I flew into his arms, and felt the air _whoosh_ out of him. Oops. I had forgotten how strong I was, and I was overcome with amazement… _I had knocked the breath out of Emmett Cullen._ I felt his chest vibrate with silent laughter, but he put his arms around me anyway. As suddenly as my joy had appeared, it departed me. _Edward was gone._ Sobs began to tear out of my body, and the sensation of crying without tears unsettled me even more.

Just like always, when confronted with my hysteria, Emmett just stood there and soothed me. He didn't get uncomfortable or shy away from me the way that most men would when there was an emotionally unstable woman in their midst. In the middle of all of his comforting noises and reassuring words, I felt myself relax a bit.

"He's gone?" My words were muffled in Emmett's shirt, but he understood me easily.

"Yeah, Bells. He's gone."

***

**Edward POV**

I knocked on the door of the Denali house, knowing that it was not necessary. They had heard me approaching; I had not been quiet. When Tanya answered the door, puzzlement apparent on her face, I fell into her arms and roared. She tightened her grip on me, murmuring words of comfort in my ear.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. She must not have… survived." At first I was confused, then I recalled that Rosalie had shown up here too. She must have told them of the pregnancy.

"No, she did survive. I have forsaken her, once again. I have never held her in the proper regard, Tanya. She is stronger than any being I have ever known, and I have treated her like a petulant child. She survived the birth, with the help of my family. I should have been there, by her side. Instead, I was tracking down a creature I wasn't even sure existed, only to use that man as an enticement to kill our beautiful daughter. Oh Tanya, you should see Renesmee. She is so strong, so perfect. She has my hair color, but it falls in the most wondrous curls. Her eyes are like Bella's, brown and warm, full of inquisitiveness and joy. She is a marvel, and I have been determined to kill her since I learned of her existence. How can I be a father to such a wonder, after being so bent on ending her life? How can I look Bella in the eye, after trying to tear something so glorious from her grasp? I have hurt her so many times; she will never forgive me. She clings to Emmett like a drowning woman would cling to a life preserver, and I can not read her thoughts. I don't know how deep the affection between them is."

Tanya sighed, and pulled me in to the house. "And Emmett's thoughts, Edward? What are his intentions? I know that he has renounced Rosalie…" She trailed off, a pain in her face that I could not understand. Where was Rosalie? Shouldn't she be with the Denali?

"His thoughts are only for her wellbeing, at the moment. I detected no unseemly intentions, but Emmett is well able to mask his thoughts, apparently. I read no intention in them to leave Rosalie, either. Where is she? I want to see Rosalie."

Tanya's face crumpled. _The fucking wolves, Edward. _In her mind, I heard the phone call that Carlisle had placed to her; everyone in Ithaca must have been so focused on Bella and Renesmee that Rosalie wasn't on their minds. Or else, they were guarding me from the news. _Tanya,_ Carlisle intoned, _Rosalie is gone. When she left your family, she returned to Forks to slaughter Bella's father in an act of retribution. With no other course of action left to me, I informed the Quileutes. Their leader informed me today that she had been…dispatched._ The remembered pain in his voice wounded me more than the knowledge of my sister's death. Carlisle had proceeded in exactly the same way I would have. The anger that I felt at Rosalie covered any feeling of grief that I might have had.

The sound of my grief at the loss of my wife brought the rest of the family running. I looked into the eyes of my cousins, and noted the presence of a dark-haired female that I had never met before.

"Edward," Carmen spoke, "I would like for you to meet a cousin of ours. This is Raisa."

**Bella POV**

_Dear Edward,_

_I know that you will never read this letter. I'm writing it mostly in an attempt to sort out my own thoughts. _

_It's kind of suicide, the way that I still feel after all of these years._

_The tips of my fingers were always sore from scrambling across a thousand miles of broken promises just to reach out, in vain, to touch the skin of your beautiful face. You were right. I can not overlook this abandonment._

_Not this time._

_I can't forgive you for deserting me, for leaving me alone to fight your ghost. You have always been the stronger one, and I am not capable of struggling against you any longer, though my strength has increased to a point that is inconceivable to me. I will survive you, this time._

_I am tired, love. Tired of chasing you, hiding from you, loving and hating you, and of never knowing how to move past you. I should be accustomed to searching for you by now. Why are always so far from me?_

While Renesmee slept, I often wrote Edward letters in the tattered journal I had kept as a human. I had started it when we returned from Italy, hoping that re-reading my memories as a vampire would cement them in my mind. I had been desperate to hold onto as many pieces of myself as I could. After my transition, I used it to speak to Edward in the only way that I had left to me.

***

Nahuel, Huilen and I sat on the steps of the back porch, watching Renesmee, Emmett and Jasper playing a very complex game of "bring Renesmee what she wants." I was astounded at the power of persuasion that my daughter had. It seemed that everyone who met her was immediately taken with her.

"I have only sisters, Bella. The only knowledge of my kind comes from my sisters and myself. Huilen is my mother's sister. After my birth, I bit her. Whether due to gender or a genetic quirk, I am the only member of my race that is venomous. I want you to know that I am very fond of Renesmee, but I have no untoward expectations of her. My respect for you is immense. Your strength astounds me, as does the dedication of your family. Especially Emmett and Carlisle; their dedication to saving you reminds me of the dedication that my father, Joham, should have had. He regards the human women that he sires children upon to be no more than breeding stock; a means to an end. He fancies himself a scientist, creating a new race of beings. Before we met you, I did not know that the bonds of love could be so strong. Huilen and I are so closely bonded because of our blood ties, I always assumed. Meeting all of you and learning that love can extend so far and reach so deeply moves me in a way that I can not describe."

I leaned back on my elbows, taking in all that he had said. Somewhere out there, there were others like Renesmee. Young women, strong and beautiful, yet able to pass for human in a way that my family and I never could. Once again, I marveled at the soft luminescence that her skin had in sunlight; unlike my own glittering complexion, her skin would never keep her indoors on a sunny day. I looked to Huilen, my heart soaring at the lightening of her eyes. She and Nahuel had very easily knitted themselves into the fabric of our family. She and I had bonded over my determination to never taste human blood and her new determination to never taste it again. Huilen had also formed a surprising new friendship with Alice; after a century and a half of scrabbling for whatever clothing she could find, under Alice's tutelage, she discovered that she was actually a clotheshorse as well. Alice called her "a natural," as they looked over photographs of runway shows and worked out their own sketches.

We never discussed their departure, and it was becoming less and less likely that there would be one. Nahuel slept in the guest room, and Huilen stored her rapidly multiplying wardrobe there, but I had overheard Esme discussing the logistics of building a guest house on the back half of the property. In her element, Esme was elated at the new additions to the family, and the opportunity to flex her design muscles. Unaccustomed to such generosity, Huilen and I were also able to be uncomfortable about accepting lavish gifts together.

"Mama, look!" My eyes widened in surprise at Renesmee's first words. She was holding up a heart-shaped rock that Jasper had found for her, and he swept her up to throw her into the air, much higher than my maternal instincts liked. I bounded off of the porch and reached for her, feeling elated at her advanced faculties. Intellectually, I knew that I shouldn't be surprised, but I couldn't help feeling a surge of motherly pride. I had the smartest baby in the world.

"Uncle Emmett! I wanna climb trees!" As if she were testing out her new ability, Renesmee began to chatter into his ear as he slung her onto his back, her little arms wrapped securely around his thick neck. When they bounded off into the forest, I turned to see unadulterated love pouring from the eyes of my family. Everyone had come rushing out to investigate when Renesmee had spoken, Alice still holding a mixing bowl and a wooden spoon.

Alice had discovered her calling when she learned to cook for me as a human, and she insisted on cooking for Nahuel and Renesmee, trying to persuade Renesmee to eat solid food as well as the donated blood that she was so fond of. So far, we had discovered that she would always leap at the opportunity to eat waffles, and eggs. I was not surprised.


	13. Chapter 13 The Realization

_Chapter Thirteen - The Realization_

**Emmett POV**

"Uncle Emmett! I wanna climb trees!" The sound of Renesmee's little voice brought me out of the stupid trance I was in. I had been stoked to hear her first words, and now she was scrambling out of Bella's arms to get to me. As Bella passed her over, her hand brushed mine, and I almost fell apart.

_Fuckfuckfuck._ Before Renesmee had decided to show us all her new skills, I had been playing fetch and carry with her, looking at Bella and trying to convince my head to shut the fuck up. Bella was leaned back on her elbows on the steps, all absorbed in her conversation with the South Americans. The breeze was moving her hair around, and she kept pushing it behind her ear like she didn't even really notice it. Her skin was glowing in the sun, and her eyes were fading out to a pinkish-orange color that somehow suited her perfectly. Her eyes were cooling off pretty quick; it had only been about a week since she woke up, but sometimes it seemed like she'd been a vampire forever.

The confidence that Bella exuded these days was amazing. She'd always been tough as a human, but it was like she was _born _to be a vampire. She was sure of herself, and graceful in a way that she'd never been before. Somehow, even with all of those changes, she was still the little-bitty Bella that I adored. It was kinda like the girl next door that had finally grown boobs; you knew her, and you were comfortable with her, but all of a sudden you had these feelings for her that you didn't know what to do with.

And I sure didn't know what to do with mine. It was pretty plain to see that she was still in a world of hurt over Eddie; I could hear her at night sometimes, while Renesmee slept, scribbling in the worn-out old journal she'd brought from Forks. I would never dream of reading it, but somehow the frenzied tone of the scratching pen let me know that she was venting something fierce.

She never talked about him out loud. _Never._ If someone mention his name, she walked out of the room.

"That one Uncle Emmett! The _big_ one!" Renesmee had found a tree that she liked, and I shook my head when I looked up at it. The fucking thing was about a hundred feet tall.

"No way, Kiddo. Your mom would skin me alive if she caught us in that tree. How 'bout that one over there? You'll still be able to see _really_ _far._" She bounced on my back, letting me know that she was cool with the compromise. This kid thing came pretty natural to me, maybe because I was still a kid myself in a lot of ways. One thing was for sure, I was as hooked on Renesmee as a person could be. She even watched football with me, raising her little arms and bouncing when my team scored. Bella got a big kick out of us, and it was just about the only time that her smile went all the way up to her eyes like it was supposed to.

***

When we got back to the house, Bella was still on the steps, by herself this time. She had her face turned up to the setting sun, like she was trying to suck up all of the warmth she could. I swung Renesmee around so that she was sitting on my hip, then I dropped her in my lap as I sat down next to Bella. Right off, Bella leaned over and kissed Renesmee's forehead, then she leaned back and put her head against my shoulder. She sighed really deep, but she didn't say anything.

If my fucking heart could beat, it would have been pounding out of my chest. It took everything I had to keep my breath normal, but I knew that her senses were even a little better than mine; she'd notice the slightest change.

"He's not coming back, Emmett." She didn't move, didn't stop looking out at the trees. She didn't even get that strangled tone in her voice that she'd had at first, when she could still talk about him. It was like she was commenting on the fucking weather, or something.

"No, Bells. He's not coming back." Holding my breath, and hoping to God that she wouldn't take it in a way that she was uncomfortable with, I planted a super-light kiss on the top of her head. That was something a big brother could do, right?

Her little arm snaked around my back, and she settled in. We sat there, watching the sunset while Renesmee played with Bella's hair for an hour.

**Esme POV**

I looked up from my sketches of the small guesthouse I was planning for Nahuel and Huilen, letting my mind wander as my eyes drifted towards the window.

In many ways, though I had lost two very dear members of my family and I mourned for them, my family felt complete. The addition of Huilen and her nephew thrilled me; the bond between Nahuel and Renesmee was a source of joy to us all. His continued presence was a comfort, always reminding us that our fears for Renesmee's future were unfounded.

The enormous seclusion of our home allowed the younger members of my family to avoid the hassle of high school; Bella was not ready to be exposed to humans, and Renesmee's rapid growth would attract a huge amount of undue attention. As my eyes took in the sights of the wilderness around us, they lit upon Bella, Emmett and Renesmee. The sight of them made a smile so intense it was almost painful spring to my face.

Renesmee sat peacefully in Emmett's lap, tangling her delicate fingers in Bella's long hair, while Bella's head rested on Emmett's broad, sure shoulders and her arm was clasped around his waist. Although I would never say it to them for fear of disturbing the very cautious balance of their relationship, they were a family unit whole unto themselves, inside the larger one that included the rest of us.

**Bella POV**

I missed him so much that it felt like I was falling apart, sometimes, but even that missing him could not cool my anger. He had been right when he said that I would never forgive him; whenever I looked in Renesmee's face, I felt a new surge of rage. If he'd had his way, the world would be missing it's most valuable creation.

Weeks passed. Six of them, to be exact. My eyes slowly took on a color closer to the golden one I'd been anticipating. Renesmee took her first steps four weeks into my mourning, climbing out of Carlisle's lap and running to Emmett, asking him about going swimming like he'd promised to do when she was "bigger." I was not surprised that my daughter's first steps turned into her first run, and I smiled indulgently at her, along with everyone else who doted on and adored her.

Sometimes, when I looked at her, I grieved for Charlie and Renee. They called sometimes, and Carlisle always found a reason for why I couldn't talk. I wasn't ready to let them think that I had died, though I knew it was going to have to come soon. I wished that they could know their granddaughter, know of the joy that I had found in her, though my joy in my husband had dissipated.

I leaned on Emmett more and more, spending time quietly in his presence when I wasn't in my room. He seemed to sense my need for silence, and he never asked questions. He hugged me often, and became even more silly in an attempt to bring a smile to my face. More often than not, his efforts paid off. Regardless of my grief, it was hard to be miserable in Emmett's presence; his joy was simply too great, and his love for the people around him too strong.

He took Renesmee swimming, like he'd promised. I spent that day reclining on the riverbank, watching them splash around and act like children together. Like everything else, Renesmee proved to be an adept swimmer. He let her jump off of a low hanging branch and into the water, where he immediately caught her and threw her high into the air. I laughed, and for a moment, the tension eased. Like a fist that had been clenched, something inside of me released by the tiniest possible measurement.

I spent my evenings writing.

****

_Dear Edward_

_"I am writing you this letter because it would be easier if you didn't speak. I have so much to say, and accusations to make._

_I bared myself because I could never stand to hide a single detail from you. I was proud to be vulnerable in your presence, empowered by my own weaknesses and my willingness to expose them. Now, shivering in the winter of your neglect, I wish that I would have held on to some of my clothing. The wind blows around me and the sun hides behind all of the clouds that you've created, and you've set me back down where you found me without a moment's hesitation. Your life will continue just as it was before we met, but my mind has become a minefield that I don't want to walk through, for fear that I will step on a memory carelessly tossed aside._

_Sylvia Plath said "I wait and ache. I think I must have been healing."_

_I must have been, too. Your well dressed betrayal no longer stings and needles at me as it once did. From the dark stillness of my empty room, I no longer writhe in a golden Hell borne of your neglect and abandonment. Where I once starved for your affection, now I have grown fat on my distrust. Something cancerous grows at the base of my spine, and if I were to slice open my skin in order to pull it out, I'm sure the blackened mass would bear your name, your fingerprints._

_Your face wounds me. A reminder of all that was wasted, of the ichor poured out on the broken altar in your name. A sacrifice of my love, my dignity, my self-respect…_

_A sacrifice made entirely in vain._

I closed the journal, after filling the last page of it.

The nights were the hardest time for me. I often curled up in my bed while Renesmee slept, partially out of a left over habit, and partially because it was easier to remember the human nights I had spent in Edward's arms there. With my eyes closed and my memory flying, I lay prone and I waited. I willed myself to seal away all of the recollections that I had cemented in my mind, to let his ghost depart.

When I heard Renesmee stir, I got out of bed to check on her. As I looked down at her, I thought of how much love surrounded her. As a human girl, I had always wanted to be a part of a large family. For a while, I had felt it with the Cullens, then with the pack in La Push after they left. Now, though I missed my human family desperately, I felt assured of my place. I was where I had always belonged, even if the reason for this existence had departed from me.

I wandered down the stairs, into the living room where Jasper, Nahuel and Emmett were playing videogames and ribbing each other good naturedly. Alice and Huilen were going over some sketches Huilen had made, while Esme compared paint samples against her own sketches for the guesthouse while speaking to Carlisle, who was working at the hospital, on her cell phone. In order to convince Huilen and Nahuel to accept the home she was designing, we had to refer to it as "the guesthouse," and constantly reassure them that Esme would have found a reason to build one anyway, with her passion for design. They were still hesitant about large gifts, after their hardscrabble existence in the South. Understanding their discomfort, I was adamant in my reassurances. The construction was to start in a couple of days, and I could sense the growing excitement under their apprehension.

"Bells!" Emmett's joy at my presence sent a wave of guilt washing over me. I had been distancing myself from the family slightly, hiding in my room to wallow in the grief over Edward. "Did you come to watch me kick some a--, er, some butt?" He winked at me as Esme gave him a warning look, and I couldn't help bursting into laughter.

"Sure, Em. Carry on, I'm just going to hang out for a bit." I selected the Collected Works of the Bronte Sisters off of the shelf, and flopped carelessly into an oversized chair. With my newfound grace, I reveled in the haphazard actions that I could perform without falling over. I tried to lose myself in the book, but my eyes kept wandering to the low videogame chairs where the boys huddled. Looking for all the world like the teenage boys that they often played, Jasper and Emmett were swapping light punches and heavy insults while Nahuel quietly out-performed them.

"Damn, son!" Emmett shot a look at Esme and mumbled an apology before continuing, "You're killing me, here! Ease up!" I watched as his brow furrowed, and the expression on his face changed slightly every few seconds. Completely absorbed in their pursuits, my family wasn't paying me any attention, and I could watch him without attracting notice.

My feelings for Emmett were conflicted and difficult. I relied on him far more than was fair to him, having nothing to offer him in return. I was anxious in his absence, and his presence was a balm to my tortured nerves. Much like Jacob's presence in my life had been when Edward left, but different, too. I didn't _need _Emmett as I had needed Jake; I simply felt better when he was around.

Jasper tossed his controller to the floor, getting up with a look of disgust on his face. "Bella, I'm thirsty. I know you have to be, too. Let's go hunt while these idiots go at each other." He gestured to Emmett and Nahuel, and I got up. Replacing my book on the shelf in it's proper place, I thought about his request. Of course, I always wanted to hunt. More than anything, almost, I always felt that desire. But I had never been hunting with Jasper, and I knew that it was a favored time for members of the family to have private discussions. Thinking about his special abilities for the first time, I groaned inwardly, but I kept my expression neutral.

"Sure, let's go. I'm in the mood for bigger game, though. Let's make a run north." The farther from here, the better, I neglected to add. He nodded at me.

****

"You seem better tonight." Whether it was a result of his abilities, or just a natural respect for others' emotional space, Jasper was characteristically vague.

"I have to be, Jazz. I can't keep this mourning up forever. He's not coming back, and I can't spend the next hundred years grieving," I stated, matter-of-factly.

"You're right. Alice and I have talked about him a lot lately." I noted how he said "him," avoiding using his name. "He seems to be recuperating in Denali, albeit slowly, but he has no intention of ever returning to us. His shame is too great, and I must admit, though I miss my brother, I think it is the wisest course of action for the time being. Though you do a tremendous job of keeping it in check, your anger is still too raw." His gentle voice held no reproach, and it spurred me to respond.

"I can't help it. I look at Renesmee, and I can't imagine being without her. If he'd had his way, I would never have known her. He's right to be ashamed of himself. How could anyone look at her and not agree?"

He nodded again before adding, "Emmett's anger is still too volatile, as well. He does as good a job of hiding it as you do, but I feel it radiating off of him whenever you withdraw, or when he's having a particularly good time with Renesmee. Their relationship is a marvel; I never saw him as the paternal type before, but his protective instincts over her are massive." His expression was casual, but I knew we were drawing to the point of the conversation.

"Yes, when I look at the two of them together, I'm overwhelmed. She loves him so much. I watch her dream sometimes, " I said, smiling. "She dreams of him and the things that they do together a lot. She definitely thinks that Emmett hung the moon." I hoped that the conversation would end there, but of course, no such luck.

"And your own feelings for Emmett?" Like he had to ask.

"Are complicated. I'm tremendously grateful, and I depend on him far more than I should. I wonder sometimes if he misses Rosalie, and why she hasn't contacted him."

**Jasper POV**

"I wonder sometimes if he misses Rosalie, and why she hasn't contacted him." The fear behind her words gave me an explanation that she never could have voiced. She was struggling against her burgeoning feelings for Emmett, convinced that Rosalie would return to claim him once again.

_Oh shit._ Emmett was going to kill me for this.

"Bella, there are things that we haven't told you. We were waiting for you to get through the delivery, then we waited for you to become acclimated to your transition… after that, the opportunity just hasn't presented itself. Emmett is probably going to be upset at me for telling you this, but you don't have to worry about Rosalie's return." I didn't know how to tell her the rest, God help me.

"What do you mean?" The trepidation in her voice was apparent, and I led her to one of the casualties of Emmett's rage to sit down. "This tree we're sitting on? Emmett tore this down while you were still pregnant." Her face was carefully blank, so I continued. "Alice had a vision the night that she learned to cook. "

"The stupid girly party! I knew they were hiding something from me!" She looked frantic, but I proceeded anyway. Like ripping a bandaid off a human.

"Yes. In Alice's vision, Rosalie was standing in the woods outside your father's house, and her eyes were red." Before she could leap to any conclusions, I sped on. "Charlie is safe. He's safe because Emmett told Carlisle to call Sam Uley. He sent the wolves after her, to protect your father."

Bella's body sagged, and I felt the relief mingling with profound remorse. "Rosalie… is she… is she dead?" Her voice sounded strained, and the fear coming off of her was palpable.

"Yes, Bella. Rosalie is dead. She died because Emmett wanted to keep your father alive." I paused to let the news sink in, while she shivered and sobbed. After a moment, I felt her ease, and I continued. "Bella, how much do you remember about Renesmee's birth?"

She looked at me in puzzlement. "Nothing. I remember the epidural, and giggling a lot, then… nothing. Why? What happened?" Her fear spiked again, and I answered in a rush.

"Emmett is the one that changed you. Your spine broke under the strain of delivery, and Carlisle couldn't take the time to bite you, because he was too busy trying to stop the bleeding so that you could hold the venom. Emmett burst into the room, and, when he learned that Carlisle couldn't, be bit you. He somehow found the control to stop, though he had never transitioned someone before. You still exist because of Emmett." A sudden burst of love came from her, more ferocious and possessive than anything I'd ever felt. She took off running back to the house at a speed almost too high for me to keep up with, and burst into the house.

**Bella POV**

I tore through the back door, Jasper's words echoing in my head.

"_You still exist because of Emmett."_

I came to an abrupt halt in the living room, where Emmett and Nahuel were still playing the videogame. Emmett looked uneasy, though, like he knew what Jasper had done.

"Emmett?" When he turned, something in my expression caused him to stand up and walk towards me.

I launched myself across the room, into his waiting arms. Without thinking about the repercussions of my actions, or where it might leave the dynamic of my family, I pressed my lips against his. I kissed him fearlessly, and with a ferocity that startled even me. I felt his body sag against me in relief, and suddenly, he was kissing me back.

In that moment, I felt all of the wounds inside of me close.


	14. Chapter 14 When it All Falls into Place

_Chapter Fourteen - When it All Falls into Place_

**Emmett POV**

I heard the screen door slam, but I just kept my attention on the TV. I didn't know what Jasper had told Bella out there, but she was running like hell.

"Emmett?" Her voice was strong, but there was a hint of a question in it. She looked like she was ready to fight a tiger or something, and I figured the best I could do was just stand up and take it.

When I got to my feet, she hauled ass across the room and wrapped her arms around me like she was drowning or something. When I looked down at her, she raised her face up to mine, and lunged.

She kissed me.

_She kissed me!_

I thought I was going to fall over, I was so relieved. She didn't want to kill me, she wanted to _kiss_ me! When I finally collected myself, I started kissing her back. Her lips moved against mine forcefully, and her body pressed up against me in a way that turned me to mush in some places and hard in others. My fingers grasped her hipbones, pulling her even closer to me. The kiss seemed to go on forever, and when I finally tore my lips away from hers, the separation was like a physical pain.

My family was gone. I could hear scraping noises upstairs, and Alice talking to Renesmee. "No, baby. You're going to sleep in Grandma and Grandpa's room tonight, okay? Mommy and Uncle Emmett need to… talk."

When I looked back down at Bella, for a second, I saw the little human girl who would be turning purple with embarrassment. Then I saw her as she really was: fierce, strong, and proud. Her head was held high, and her smile was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

Her head fell back, and I leaned down to gently kiss the spot where I'd bitten her, the tiny place that linked her to me in a physical way; it was my venom that had saved her, my love for her that had kept her safe.

**Bella POV**

Emmett's arms.

The tether that had kept me tied to the Earth, the strength that I carried with me through the loss of my husband and my humanity.

They wrapped around me so tightly that I was enveloped in him. There was nothing outside of that moment… his lips, his arms, his breath on my face and his tongue in my mouth. He was kissing me in a way that I had never been kissed before, out of deference to Edward's venom coated teeth.

I pressed myself into him for a moment before tearing away, knowing that I would be kissing him and touching him much, much more. Just as soon as I explained myself to my waiting family.

Who was absent, suddenly. I hadn't heard them depart, but I could hear them scrabbling to move Renesmee's crib up to the third floor, and Alice explaining to her that she was going to have a sleepover with Grandma and Grandpa. I couldn't figure out why they didn't just leave her in my room; we could have gone to Emmett's, for crying out loud. Maybe, since they were being a lot more noisy about it than was strictly necessary, it was their way of showing approval. Or something.

Suddenly the contemplation was irrelevant, because I could hear Jasper and Alice talking. Jasper's southern drawl almost made me dissolve into a fit of laughter. "You shoulda seen her, Alice. She took off like her tail was on fire. I thought she was gonna kill him."

Alice's sweet laughter filled the house, and then I heard the sound of her kissing Jasper. "It's about time, don't you think?"

"Alice," I said, loud enough for her to hear me, but still soft enough to be considered a low voice, "I'm not sleeping with Emmett. I've been separated for less than two months."

Before she could respond, Emmett swept me up in his arms and started up the stairs towards my bedroom. "Yeah, she's not_ sleeping_ with me. There'll be no _sleeping together_ going on. Absolutely, no _sleeping."_

***

Emmett was still holding me in his arms, and he bent to kiss me again. Tender this time, without the sense of immediacy, our lips moving together in a quiet rhythm that soothed me and put my fears at ease. He placed me gently on the bed, and stretched the length of his massive body on top of my own. As his lips moved to my chin and down my collarbone, I gasped and arched my back, pressing against him and gripping his broad shoulders. As my head fell back, I whispered to him, hoping the rest of my family was occupied somehow, enough to not hear us.

"Emmett, we can't… I can't." I moaned lightly against the suddenly bare skin of his shoulder. "It's too soon, Emmett." He worked his way back up my throat, ending with the most tender of kisses on my waiting lips.

"I know, Bells. Let's just…" he slid his hands to my hipbones, his lips lingering on the hollow of my throat, "be close to one another tonight."

Knowing that he expected nothing more of me than I was ready to give, I spent the night in Emmett's arms, marveling at the power his touch had over me. By the time the sun rose, we were both frustrated, but elated.

In the shadow of a storm, I had finally found my safe harbor.

****

I knew that I shouldn't feel embarrassed when Emmett and I left my room the next morning. Anyone with ears in the house knew exactly what did, and what didn't, happen. Still, I felt a great amount of gratitude that I could no longer blush.

As we made our way down the stairs, Emmett kept his hand clasped firmly in mine.

The quiet looks of joy on the faces of my family eased some of my fears, and they were totally relieved when I looked at Carlisle.

With a knowing smirk that I'd never seen on his face before, he winked at me. "I hear that I missed quite a show last night." Never having heard Carlisle crack a joke that I could remember, I dissolved into laughter. When the rest of the family joined in, I knew that there were no hard feelings, no reproach in them. Those wonderful beings were simply happy that the two of us had managed to find a measure of peace in a broken situation.

**Emmett POV**

Holy shit, that night was hard for me. On the one hand, I was fucking elated that whatever Jasper had said to Bella led to such an awesome reaction. On the other, there was the frustration. I understood her hesitation to get too busy that night; hell, part of me felt it too. That didn't mean that I didn't think I was going to die by the time the sun came up.

After a round of ribbing from the family, led by _Carlisle_, of all people, everything seemed pretty normal. Well, normal except for the fact that I hardly took my hands of Bella the whole day.

She was in the shower when Renesmee woke up. I heard her stirring around in her crib, so I ran up to get her. I pulled her out of bed, and she sort of sniffed like she was put out. Just like her mother when she was human, Renesmee was _not_ a morning person. She wouldn't even talk until she'd fed, she would only use her hands to send us her thoughts.

As she put her hand on my neck, my mind filled up with images of her little cup. "Yeah, yeah, doll face. We're on our way, cut me some slack." She just made the cutest little growling noise you ever heard, and buried her face in my neck. As I carried her down the stairs, I realized that it was the first time I'd ever been the one to get her out of bed in the morning. That put a little bit of a bounce into my step; after all, I was kinda the kid's step dad.

Or was I? I mean, Bella and I had never _talked_ about what was going on; we just sort of fell into her bed and made out all night. I didn't think to ask her what it meant. What if she didn't feel like I did? Did vampires have rebounds? I didn't know how to bring up the subject, but I knew that Jasper and Alice could tell me everything I wanted to know.

I walked at human speed down to the kitchen, wondering what the best way was to get the two of them alone, because after I thought about it, I realized that I had a _lot_ of questions.

****

After I fed the little monster and put her down in the floor with a truckload of books and toys, I turned on the TV for her. In some ways, she was a typical kid. Even being a genius, she still liked to watch cartoons, and she was guaranteed to be quiet if you turned on ESPN. I chalked it up to my superior mentoring skills, and the fact that I had coached her while she was still in the womb, but it was probably just because she liked to ask me questions about why I got so excited. She saw football as a strategic goldmine, and I reminded myself often to teach her how to play Risk. She'd love it, with her analytical little mind.

When I got the TV on the right channel and she was occupied, I sensed someone behind me. I turned around, and Alice was standing there. She grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. "Follow me, you idiot."

We took off through the trees, and I wondered what I'd done. I mean, I hadn't even spoken to anybody but Renesmee since I got her out of the bed. Bella was still in the shower, as far as I knew… what could I have fucked up in twenty minutes?

"What the fuck, Alice?" I yelled, as soon as we were far enough away from the house.

She might have been tiny, but Alice rounded on me like a wildcat, and I have to admit, for a second, I was a little nervous. I might have even taken a step backwards. "I brought you out here to knock some sense into you! Bella's going to eventually figure out that you're a jackass, but there's no point in her learning it today!"

"What? I didn't do anything!" Okay, now I was really confused.

"Of course she loves you, you damned fool! It doesn't take a psychic to know that Bella has been half in love with you since the minute you grabbed her at the airport and protected her from Edward, she just didn't know it herself then! I have to admit, you did a good job of keeping your paws and your feelings to yourself until she was ready to deal with them, but that's not even something that you can be remotely proud of. The only reason you did was because you were scared to death of her! Don't you _dare_ ask her what last night meant to her, because you know _exactly _what it meant. She's moved on, and she loves you, for some unknown reason. If you ask her stuff like that, she's going to shut down, and it'll take weeks to get her to come back around. Do you want that?"

"What? No, I just didn't… I mean, she was so… Edward, and she's been so sad, and…" I couldn't even complete a sentence, I was so fucking confused. I took a deep breath, then I started again. "Look, I think my concerns are pretty fucking legit. About an hour before she jumped on me, Bella was upstairs writing in that goddamned journal, probably about how much she missed Edward. I don't know what Jasper said to her, what brought on her reaction… I don't know anything. All I know is that I have been waiting for that moment for a long fucking time, and I want to be sure it's the real thing. I'm fucked here, Alice. _This_ is the thing that everyone else has. _This_ kind of love. I never had this before, and it scares me to death because she _has._ She's loved someone this much, way before she loved me. What if she still loves him? What if I'm a rebound?" I realized that I had started pacing around when Alice grabbed my arm.

"Emmett, she loves you. Of course she loves you. But she had to hold on to Edward for a while, don't you see? She gave up her _life_for him, she had to believe that he would come back one day, or she would have regretted everything. Everything except Renesmee." I looked at my feet, feeling pretty ashamed, but she kept going. "You remember how you explained it to Carlisle, about how you were still human when you met Rosalie? She hasn't even _seen_ Edward since her change. Can you imagine what that's been like for her? She did this for him, and he left her. You just have to be patient, Emmett. But she loves you. Please, never doubt that. I have seen your future, and I have to tell you, I'm busy making plans for it."

I felt all of the tension inside of me let go. I also felt like an asshole. "What did Jasper tell her, Alice? What caused all of this?"

I flopped down onto an overturned tree, probably one of my own casualties, and she perched next to me. "He told her everything. She knows about Rosalie, knows that you changed her. She knows that you love her, and it was all the push she needed." I took in a sharp breath, ready to let her have it for telling Bella something so fucked up, but she held up her hand and kept talking. "She was afraid to make a move, afraid that Rosalie was going to come back for you, Emmett. He had to tell her. Trust me, it was better coming from Jasper. He let her feel everything she needed to, and he didn't interfere. She's made her peace with everything. Knowing that you love her so much is what caused her to realize just how much she loves you. Now," she said, standing up and brushing off the seat of her pants, "we have to get back. She'll be getting out of the shower soon."

When we got back to the house, Nahuel and Renesmee were watching SportsCenter, and Renesmee was explaining the rules of American football. Bella came down the stairs, her hair still wet from the shower, and I felt like even my body wasn't big enough to hold all of the feeling inside of it. I took her in my arms, and kissed her on the forehead.

****

The rest of the day passed in a kind of blur. For as much as everything had changed, a lot of things were the same. Renesmee and Nahuel ate more food that Alice made, we all went about our normal business… except Bella was in my arms, sitting in my lap, standing by my side. When dusk came, Carlisle left for the hospital, while Esme hummed to herself and put the finishing touches on the guesthouse blueprints before we broke ground the next day. Alice was picking out the drafting board thing and stuff for Huilen's studio, because she'd insisted that it was necessary.

Bella and I sat on the couch, her legs thrown over my lap and Renesmee sitting on top of them, resting in the crook of my arm. Bella was reading some kind of damn British book from before I was born, and Renesmee was trying hard to fight sleep. When she finally nodded off, Bella gently moved her legs, and I took her in my arms. Esme looked up at the movement, and smiled with an "ah, I see" kind of look before she sort of mouthed, "our room."

If Bella could have blushed, I bet she would have.

She followed me up the stairs, kissing Renesmee goodnight, and then leaving me to put her to bed. I heard her step into her bedroom, and I figured she wanted me to follow.

**Bella POV**

After the wonderful day we'd had, I knew that it was going to all be okay. Emmett really did love me. I'd never doubted it, really. So as he tucked Renesmee in, I went to my bedroom. _Got to deal with this sooner or later,_ I thought to myself. _Might as well be tonight._ When he stepped into the room, all of my apprehension fell away, and I was overtaken by just how beautiful, how _vital_ he was.

"Emmett, I…" I took a deep breath, and continued. "I'm scared, a little. I've only, well, I was only with Edward a few times, and it was difficult because I was still human. I couldn't really participate, and… Oh, Emmett, I don't really know what I'm doing!" Okay, maybe not _all_ of my apprehension. He'd been mated with the most beautiful creature in the world for almost a hundred years. I couldn't imagine the things that you would have to do to keep things spicy after that long. He'd probably done everything there was to do, and now he was going to have to deal with a girl that was basically a virgin, because I'd never been allowed to really move when Edward and I had sex. The _few_ times we had sex, I might add.

He smiled at me, gathering me to his chest and kissing the top of my head, like he so often did. "Bella, I know. It's okay… we'll go slow, and I'll teach you. Hey, don't you know that it's every guy's fantasy to play teacher? It's pretty hot, actually. Doesn't hurt things that you're so perfect, either." He took a step back so he could look into my eyes, and kissed me, slowly.

_Thank God for buttons,_ I thought, as Emmett unbuttoned my shirt. Because of them, he could keep kissing me, at least until we got past the embarrassing disrobing part. As my shirt slid down my shoulders, I closed my eyes and held my breath. Emmett's lips trailed down my throat, stopping the spot just below my ear that he favored, then I heard him gasp. I opened my eyes in fear, and saw that he was looking down at my bare breasts, with a look of absolute joy on his face.

"Bella, you are so perfect," he murmured, running his hands over my body. He pulled me to his broad chest, his fingers skimming lightly up and down my spine. When his hand reached the base of my skull, he cupped his hand around my neck and pulled my lips to his, his thumb stroking my cheek. He kissed me with a sort of urgency, almost like the first kiss we shared, and I lost myself in him… the taste of his mouth, the incredible scent of him. The hardness of his body, the sheer size of him making me feel tiny and delicate, though I knew my strength was greater. He moved his hand to the middle of my back, and stooped to put his other hand on my thighs, sweeping me into the traditional bridal position, carrying me the few steps to the bed. He placed me gently on the already-turned-down bed, _thank you Alice_, and took a step back to take off his own shirt.

His body was unassailably divine. The lines of his muscles were thrown in sharp relief against the pale of his skin, with two deep lines running past his hipbones and down into the waistband of his low-slung jeans. Suddenly, I really wasn't afraid. Only unbelievably aroused.

I reached for him, using a touch of my superior strength to pull his body down, covering mine. My fingers played slowly over the ridges of his muscles, stopping when I reached the boundary that was the waistband of his jeans. I ran my finger down the bulge in them, then pressed my hips against it as he stifled a low moan. "Bella, are you sure? I don't want to do anything you aren't ready for." I pressed my lips hard against his, to keep him from helping me to change my mind.

"I'm ready, Emmett." I meant to unbutton his pants, I swear. But I accidentally ripped them. We both laughed as he kicked his legs out of the ragged remains, and kissed a line between my breasts, to the waistband of mine. He ran his tongue lightly just underneath the band, and then went back to my breasts to suck and nibble on my taut nipples, one at a time. I felt a heat that I hadn't experienced before in my new body begin to grow between my legs, and Emmett moaned.

"Oh God, Bella. I can smell you getting ready for me." He crashed into me like a boulder, his lips on mine and his hands stroking the rapidly readying cleft. I whimpered and pressed my body as close to him as it could get, feeling his hardness brush against the crotch of my jeans. I lifted my hips and reached to unbutton them, but he grabbed my wrists and brought them to rest above my head, still kissing me. He pressed them into the pillow to remind me to keep them there, then he ran his fingers down my arms, my ribcage, my hipbones… hooking his fingers into the waist, he pulled hard and split them in to two pieces, throwing them over his shoulder. "Turnabout is fair play," he whispered, pressing his lips to the heat that was emanating through the lacy panties that were all Alice seemed to have bought for me. Running his tongue around the crease at the inside of my thigh, he ripped those off as well, shredding them into scraps.

When his tongue touched me, a cry tore out of my lips. I grasped the sheets in both hands, twisting them until I heard a ripping noise. He chuckled, but took both of my hands in his as his tongue worked feverishly between my legs. As I exploded against his mouth, I pulled his hands until his body was covering mine again, lifting my hips to urge him onward. Wild for him to enter me, my hips began to grind against him.

"Damn it, Bella," he groaned. "I wanted to go slow…"

"Please, Emmett," I gasped. "I can't take anymore. Please." He ran his hand up my thigh, hooking my knee and holding in in place as he pressed against me, moving so slowly I thought I would come again. The tip of him teased against my folds, and I threw my head back, trying to stop a wild scream. I had never felt such a base, animalistic urge in my entire existence. Biting down on my lower lip to keep as quiet as I could, I began to pull him into me. Not to be rushed, he eased in by centimeters, until my body was full of him. With the same slowness, he pulled out to the tip. This time, instead of creeping in, he entered me in one swift thrust, and any concerns I had about being quiet were forgotten.

**Emmett POV**

The sun started coming through the windows way too soon. Bella and I were tangled up in her bed, her head on my chest and her leg thrown across me. I was wrapping a strand of her hair around my fingers, thinking about all of the times I had never felt the post-coital contentment I did right then.

I didn't want to get up, didn't want to face the day out of the fucking bed. Bella didn't want to get up because she was noisy, and embarrassed about it.

"Bells, seriously. Anybody old enough to know what we were doing has done it before, themselves. Do you think that none of us have ever overheard sex before? Besides, Esme is already building one guesthouse. If you keep acting all ashamed, she'll want to build another one, and then you'll have to accept a gift. Can't have that." I pulled her up so that her body was balanced on top of mine, and kissed her until she giggled.

"Okay, okay. We've got to get up, anyway. Renesmee will be up soon."

Bella got in the shower, and I made my way downstairs. The whole family was sitting in the living room. Everyone except Nahuel was grinning from ear to ear. He just looked really, really embarrassed. "Look," I said, whispering low enough that Bella probably couldn't hear me over the running water. "She's all ashamed and she doesn't want to come downstairs. Please, _please_ don't tease her about anything just yet, okay?" I gave Jasper and Alice a hard look, knowing they were the only ones likely to. "I mean it, Jasper!" He nodded, and stood up.

"I think it would be best if Alice and I went out for the day. She wants to do some shopping." I almost jumped up and down like a little girl when he mentioned it.

"Yes, get out. Get the _fuck--_sorry, Esme-- out, dude. Don't come back for a few hours!" I ran to the coat closet and started throwing jackets at them, not even stopping to see who they belonged to. Esme walked up beside me, gathering them as she came across the room. She hung each one back up neatly, and then put her hand on my shoulder.

"Emmett, please try to relax," she whispered. "They can't go anywhere, we're starting the guesthouse today. It's all going to be okay, but you have got to get yourself together! You're going to send poor Bella into hysterics if she comes down here and sees you like this!"

Fuck, she was right. I hadn't realized that I was nervous, too. I took a few deep breaths, and stretched out like a prizefighter. It was an unnecessary carry-over habit from being human, but it relaxed me. "You're right. I'm good. I'm going to get the baby."

***

Esme asked Nahuel and Huilen to stay behind with Renesmee while we built their house, so they would be surprised and shit when it was finished. Jasper, Alice, Bella, Esme, Carlisle and I headed out to the back part of the property, where I had already cleared a lot of the trees.

We got everything done that day except the flooring and the cosmetic stuff. It was really funny to see Bella get drafted for the serious heavy lifting, because even if she was the strongest of us, she was still really tiny. She didn't know shit about construction, but she caught on quick. Carlisle showed her how to do the wiring, and she was a fucking pro in no time. Pretty much wired the whole house by herself. She kept going on and on about how perfect the place was, how much she loved it. I'd never really heard Bella talk about her taste in architecture, and it was really interesting to hear what she liked. I filed it away in my mind, to remember for when she was ready for us to head out on our own.

We were all sprawled out on the lawn of the house, looking up at it with pride. None of us needed the rest, but it seemed appropriate. Even when you don't get tired, it's still fucking weird to stand around talking for hours at a time. Normal people sit, and it was important for Bella to acquire "normal" habits. We couldn't keep her hidden forever. "You know what this place needs?" she asked, looking around the clearing. Everyone turned to look at her, kind of surprised that she was interested enough to suggest anything. "This place," she went on, "needs one of those stone walls like a secret garden, with a wrought-iron gate and climbing plants. It just _looks_ like the sort of house that would be tucked away in a hidden garden."

"You're right, Bella," Esme said, eyeing the place pretty hard. "That's exactly what's been missing! I need to place the order for the stones this evening so they can be here as soon as possible. Let's get back to the main house; we've done enough for one day, and I'm sure you're anxious to get back to Renesmee." Bella was already flying before Esme finished the sentence.


	15. Chapter 15The Truth of the Matter

_Chapter Fifteen - The Truth of the Matter_

**Emmett POV**

She might have been a vampire, but being more graceful didn't keep Bella from having a streak of light blue paint across her cheekbone, and drywall dust in her hair. With a paint roller in one hand and her other on her hip, she was inspecting the living room wall to take in the results of her effort. I was supposed to be outside with Carlisle and Jasper, helping them put up the wall that Bella was so invested in, but I'd caught a glimpse of her through the window and had just sort of wandered into the house to look at her. She didn't turn around, but she must have known I was there, because she started talking.

"Emmett, I love this house." She said it the same way that somebody would comment on the weather, but I could hear a little bit of longing in her voice. All of a sudden, I was desperate for us to have our _own_ house. With Rosalie, we'd always moved out because she wanted to, and I'd never really wanted to leave the rest of the family. Right then, I wished more than anything that I could build her a house with my own two hands; that I could know she would want to live in it with me. Just the three of us.

"Bella, I'm so glad you like the house." Esme had appeared out of nowhere, putting her hand on Bella's shoulder. "This is your house." Bella just looked at her with this blank look.

_Oh fuck. She doesn't want to live with me. She doesn't want us to have a house._ I was so busy being devastated that she didn't want to live with me, it really didn't even register that Esme had just given us someone else's house.

"Esme, this is Nahuel and Huilen's house. We've been trying to convince them to take it since you first mentioned it, and they've finally come around. You can't just say that you changed your mind!" The look on her face was adorable, all confused and shocked that Esme would ever do something so impolite. Right then, all of the pieces fell into place for me, but I wasn't going to say anything.

_Alice telling me that she had seen us, she was busy making plans. How long had they known this was coming? Why the fuck didn't someone tell me, save me from all those weeks of hell?_

"Bella, dear, Huilen and Nahuel have been in on the surprise from the beginning. I knew that, if you spent so much time trying to convince them to accept such a gift, you would feel it hypocritical not to accept one yourself. The 'studio' Alice planned for Huilen is actually a study for you; we noticed that you seemed to take some comfort in writing, and wanted you to have a place to pursue that interest in solitude. That's why we've kept the sketches and designs out of your sight. This will afford you a bit of independence, though you'll be close enough to spend as much of your day with us as you'd like."

I expected Bella to put up a fight; at least a token resistance or something… but she just flew across the room and launched herself at Esme, holding her and blubbering about "too much" and "love it," "thank you," and "can't believe it." Then it was like something dawned on her, and she turned to look at me. She walked up to me at the slowest, most human pace I could imagine, and kissed me softly on the lips.

"Oh, Emmett. We have a house!"

_We have a house._

I picked her up and spun her around, laughing and kissing her until my breath came heavy.

**Bella POV**

_A house?!_ I couldn't believe it. I wandered through the rooms, trailing my fingers along the various surfaces and marveling at the perfection of _my house._ Our house.

In my study, three of the walls were covered from floor to ceiling with completely stocked bookshelves; I was almost as well equipped as a library. On the fourth wall was an arrangement of some of my favorite paintings from the house in Forks, and some new ones that I had never seen but suited me perfectly. In the center of the room was a simple, slender-legged desk with clean lines and dark wood; not Esme's taste, but utterly mine. In neat piles on it were new leather-bound journals, and small notebooks. There was a Tiffany lamp, and a small crystal vase stocked with any writing implement one could imagine. Also on the desk was a new dark blue laptop, with a note on the top of it.

_Bella,_

_I didn't know if you would prefer to write in the journals, or on the computer, so I made sure you had both. There are more blank journals in the closet. I hope you love your house._

_Love, Alice_

I was overwhelmed at the generosity of my family. I wandered into the master bedroom, finding the Georgian furniture I had chosen for the big house, and an adjoining bathroom to rival the one I was leaving behind. The walk-in closet was full of impractical clothes, a small dresser inside it holding the things I could actually imagine wearing. In one dresser on the other wall of the closet was enough French lingerie to stock a boutique, and I shook my head at Alice's insistence on helping me get some.

Renesmee's room looked like something from a fairy-tale… all white furniture with a canopy bed, swooping golden cherubs, and frilly pink fabric draped over everything. On the wall opposite the window was a mural that Jasper had shocked me with his talent to create, featuring dancing fairies and unicorns. The perfect bedroom for a little girl to grow up in, surrounded by beauty and people that loved her.

As I stood in her room, I thought about the one person who should love her as much as I did, and had no idea how perfect she was. The anger that washed over me was enough to drive me outside, for fear that I would somehow damage the impeccable house. I stood under the faint stars, looking at the rising moon, and I felt a snarl tear out of me that turned to the feral screech of a wild and wounded animal. Before I could choke off the sound, Emmett was standing in front of me.

"What's the matter, babe? What's going on?" He immediately began scanning the area, but he put his arms around me when he found nothing to explain my actions. "Talk to me, Bells. Tell me what hurts."

I couldn't hold it in anymore. There was just too much anger, and too much pain that I had been holding in for far too long. "He should _be_ here, Emmett. He should know her, should be a part of his daughter's life. He even wished for a damned shotgun wedding once! He doesn't even know her, doesn't know how wonderful she is, or how smart… He hasn't even _called,_ Emmett! He doesn't know anything about her, and he doesn't seem like he cares to! I don't care if he doesn't want me, I don't give a _damn_ how he feels or doesn't feel about me anymore! I just want him to acknowledge the fact that he has a _daughter! _Who would have ever thought that Edward Cullen would turn out to be a dead-beat dad?"

**Emmett POV**

"_I don't care if he doesn't want me."_

It was a lot easier to comfort her after she said that.

"Bella, he's an idiot. He's always been an idiot, and for all that he wants to think of himself as a fighter, when it comes to you, he's always been a coward. He never gave you any credit for how strong, how amazing… look, he was afraid of you. That's the thing that you never saw about him; he treated you like you were the weak one, maybe because he knew that you were so much stronger than he would ever be. Look at yourself, now. You're the most together, toughest person I've ever met. You're a badass mother, you're an incredible lover," I nuzzled her neck and planted a light kiss just below her ear, "and you're still a newborn. You saw the girl, Bree, in the clearing that day. You saw how crazed she was. You might not have been exposed to any humans yet, but you are still able to go about the day to day business of being alive without wanting to go hunting for them or losing your mind anytime somebody twitches. You shouldn't even be able to stand here, discussing this with me right now. With the newborn temper, you should already be halfway to Denali, ready to kill Edward. But you're not. You're here, with me, because you're strong, and perfect. And because I love you."

Her breath caught, and I realized what I'd just said. _Shit._

"You… you love me? I mean, I guess I know that you love me, but it sure is great to hear it right now. I love you, Emmett. God help me, but I do. I love you and I never want to be apart from you. I'm so happy I could just cry. Well, I can't cry, but I want to. Because we have this beautiful house and such an amazing family… and now we have Nahuel and Huilen and Renesmee isn't going to get old and die… I've been so afraid of everything, but I'm not afraid anymore. Because I have you." She crashed into me, her lips trembling as she pushed them hard against my own. Her whole body was shaking, and as I took her shoulders into my hands to soothe her, I felt them begin to slide down to wrap themselves around her waist, like they had a mind of their own.

As much as I loved the kid, I was glad that Carlisle and Esme were keeping her at the big house that night.

****

After every surface in the new house had been christened, with the exception of Renesmee's room, Bella and I decided to soak in the clawfoot bathtub together.

She sat in front of me, between my legs as I worked shampoo through her long, dark hair. The silence was thick, but it was still comfortable until she broke it. "Emmett, we need to talk about something."

_Uh-oh._ "What's that, Half-pint?" I tried to make my voice sound casual, and all I could do was hope that she didn't notice that I'd stopped breathing. Fuck, if I took a breath, I'd probably break in to pieces.

"I want to go to the big house when we get done. I miss Renesmee, and I think I need to talk to Carlisle and Alice."

Okay, not what I was expecting, but I'd bite. "What about, babe?" I felt the tension in me relax just the tiniest bit; maybe whatever she had going on wasn't too bad. She'd be too embarrassed to involve Carlisle in something serious.

"I want a divorce."

I wanted to jump out of the tub and do a goddamned touchdown dance or something. Excessive celebration, indeed. Instead, I just tried to keep my cool. "Okay, Bells. Why do you and I need to talk about that? Seems to me like that's between you and Edward. Carlisle and Alice, too, I guess."

She tilted her head back, and I cupped one hand on along her hairline to keep the soapy water from running into her face. As I rinsed, she spoke. "No, it involves you, too. There's really no way of knowing how he's going to react, until I talk to Alice. You said last night that he thought of himself as a fighter, and I don't want to be unable to defend my family if he snaps." She pushed her little chin out in the stubborn way she had, and part of me wanted to laugh while the other part wanted to take advantage of our lack of clothing and the warmth of the water.

"Bells, I really don't think that'll be necessary. You learning to fight isn't a good idea right now; you're so strong, you could crush somebody who was trying to train you without meaning to. And really, could you honestly fight Edward?" She hissed at me a little, and turned to look at me.

"Emmett McCarty Cullen! Of course I could! I can do anything that I need to do in order to protect the people I love." The fire in her eyes was enough to melt me, and I kissed her. She broke away, apparently not finished giving me hell. "I can, and _will_, take him out if I have to. What would I be missing? My daughter's absentee father?" I would never tell her, but I could see her pain at the idea under all of her bravado. Bravado that totally turned me on, by the way. God, she was tough.

"Bells, you're not going to have to take him out. I can tell you exactly how it'll go down. He'll get the news, he'll come back here and whine at me for a while, then he'll leave again. He'll run off somewhere with his tail between his legs for a few years, and then he'll get his shit together. Probably not for a while, but it'll happen. I just don't see the point in having fighting lessons and getting you all worked up for a fight that won't, and _shouldn't_, happen. There doesn't need to be any fighting here, babe. It's all going to be zen. You wait and see."

I lifted her out of the tub and sat her on the thick rug beside it, then climbed out myself. I knelt at her feet and started carefully, lovingly drying every inch of her skin. _Shit, we're going to be late,_ was the last thought I remember having before we left for the main house.

**Alice POV**

_Edward and Emmett, snarling at each other as Emmett tried to pull Bella from between them. "Traitor!" Edward roars, trying to close the distance between them while still avoiding Bella's body. "I'll tear you apart and burn your corpse myself!"_

"Carlisle!" I screamed, dropping the pencil in my hand, on the verge of hysteria. Everyone in the house was at my side in an instant, and Esme began gathering the fallen sheets of sketch paper. "Edward is coming if you send those papers, and he's going to want to kill Emmett! We have to do something!" I started pacing around the room, not sure what to do or where to direct the sudden surge of energy in my body.

"Alice, calm down and start again. Why is Edward coming? What papers?" Carlisle's voice sounded calm, but I could hear the worry in it too.

"Bella wants to divorce him." I hung my head, thinking about the pain that my brother would endure at the hands of my best friend. I couldn't blame either of them; the paths they were on had led them to this point, through no one's fault. Bella could not be blamed for finding a love with Emmett that honored her strength, and Edward could not be blamed for his old-fashioned ideas about femininity. "When he gets the papers, he's going to go ballistic. He'll think that Emmett has taken advantage of Bella's 'weakness,' and he'll want to fight him. Carlisle, Bella will try to step between them! She's angry enough to tear Edward to pieces herself right now! You've got to talk her out of divorcing him, at least for the time being!"

**Bella POV**

When I walked into the house, everyone was on edge. Esme was holding Renesmee, and even she looked anxious. "Momma, why is everybody sad?" she asked, her little brow furrowed and her eyes wide. I crossed the room quickly and took her from Esme's arms, kissing her and whispering nonsensical, comforting phrases at her until she relaxed.

"Yeah, what's up?" Emmett looked as unperturbed as ever, but I knew him well enough to see that he was hiding his own apprehension.

"Bella, you're not going to want this discussion to take place in front of Renesmee. I think it would be best if Nahuel and Huilen took her for a walk." The gravity in Carlisle's tone caused me to hand her over to Huilen without question. As soon as the door shut behind them, I sank to the couch.

"What's happened?" My voice trembled, though the rest of my body remained steady. I found myself wishing that, just once, my immortal body could have a physical reaction to stress like my human one had. It was unsettling to be so worried, with no biological responses to go along with it.

"Well," Carlisle began, "I was going to speak to you this morning about something rather unpleasant, but Alice came to me with a vision that I feel needs to be discussed first. I fear this is going to be a difficult day for you, Bella.

First and foremost, I think that it would be unwise to begin divorce proceedings against Edward at this particular time. I understand your desire to be free of the marriage, and I certainly don't fault you. But the reaction from him that Alice has foreseen is something that I think we could all do without right now, in light of the other business at hand.

As you must have realized, the winter break for Dartmouth is due to begin soon. As your family is under the impression that you are there, and will be expecting you home for the winter holidays, I think it is time to begin to discuss your staged death." He paused, ostensibly to let me gather myself and my thoughts before continuing. "Jasper had the idea that we could fabricate a skiing accident. There would be no collateral damage to other lives, and it is not a rare occurrence for the victims of such tragedies to go undiscovered, their bodies never recovered. If we went that route, there would be no need for you to lie in a coffin to watch your family grieve. I think that this would be the best course of action. Of course, should your family decide to proceed with a memorial service, they would expect Edward to be present. If the subject of divorce has been brought up between the two of you, I fear that it would be nearly impossible to convince him to attend."

My head was spinning with all of the information that he'd thrown at me. Of course, some part of me had always known that this day would come; it was terribly unfair of me to expect my family to have no closure; but the idea of causing them such pain was completely repellent. I had spent the entirety of my human life protecting Renee from the harsh realities of the world. To know that I was going to have to force her to see the ugliness of my "death" was devastating. And of course, they would expect Edward to be present at my funeral!


	16. Chapter 16 The Best Laid Plans

_Chapter Sixteen_ – _The Best Laid Plans_

**Carlisle POV**

I greatly dreaded the call I would have to make to Edward, begging him to attend her funeral. Of course, I had contingency plans set in place for the chance that he would refuse, but it would simply be easier for him to be present. In a way, I thought that it might make the loss of his wife easier for him; if he could mourn her, even symbolically, perhaps it would put him in a healthier place.

Though he was the closest to me, and the secret favorite of my sons, I could not help but feel anger towards him. This mess was of his own making, and the Alice's vision had caused me such distress… I thought it selfish and unreasonable of him to begrudge Bella a new chance at love, and his habit of deserting her was bound to damage her trust in him eventually.

****

"_Hello, Carlisle. I must admit, I'm surprised to hear from you. When so much time passed with no contact, I had assumed that the family was so disgusted with my behavior that you no longer wished to speak with me."_ The bitterness in his voice was not lost on me, but I did not know how to answer him tactfully; in all honesty, we had been disappointed by his treatment of his wife and daughter.

"Edward, you have made the decisions that you thought best, and so have we. You are very greatly missed," I replied, keeping my voice as low and as soothing as possible. "The time has come for us to stage Bella's death, and I wanted to inform you. Of course, we can find an explanation, should you choose not to attend, but as her husband, I did feel that it would be the most suitable course of action for you to be present."

"_I will attend. I would like the chance to properly mourn the loss of the one great love of my existence. How is immortality suiting her, Carlisle?"_ I could not keep the biting tone out of my voice when I responded, simply because he had yet to ask about his child.

"She's adjusting wonderfully. She's exhibiting a superior ability to control the typical newborn moodswings and flares of temper. She was withdrawn and depressed when she first realized that you were gone, but she has overcome it nicely. Love has a way of changing people," I said, realizing that it was best to break the news of her newfound affections over the telephone, rather than letting the news come as a surprise to him in Emmett's thoughts. "The love of a family, of a daughter. Of course, there is something that you must be told. I hesitate to bring you this news, for I feel that it is Bella's right to choose how much of her personal life is your affair, but I will not have any dramatic scenes unfolding in my home, in front of Renesmee."

There was a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line, and a low oath was spat before I heard him say, _"Emmett,"_ the name sounding like another expletive in his mouth. _"Carlisle, what have you allowed? Has he taken advantage of Bella's weakness in my absence? His own wife's ashes are not yet cooled, and he has approached _mine?"

"Edward! You made the choice to leave your wife, and your daughter behind. You have not even asked about the well-being of your child, you think only of your own territorial claim on Bella. You speak of her 'weakness,' but Bella is among the strongest creatures I have ever known. If she has found happiness with Emmett, which she has, you should rejoice that your most recent defection hasn't damaged her as deeply as your first."

Chastened, I could hear Edward weighing his words carefully before he spoke again. _"I will attend her funeral, and I will truly grieve for the loss of the Bella that I knew and loved."_

**Edward POV**

I had never credited my brother with the ability to be devious or underhanded, so the news that he was bedding my wife came as a bit of a shock.

On the flight to New York, I struggled desperately with the urge to dismember him the moment I saw him. I heard the echo of Carlisle's words to me, and the helped to cool my wrath. _"You should rejoice that your most recent defection hasn't damaged her as deeply as your first."_ The defection that had nearly sent her into the arms of that dog, Jacob Black. Of course, that would have been better than what happened in the end; his spawn wasn't likely to kill her, to take away the lovely blush from her cheeks or the warmth of her skin.

There was a part of me that was deeply curious to once again see the ethereally beautiful child that was proof of my love for Bella, and hers for me. I did not know how to explain to Carlisle on the phone that I had not asked after her because I didn't feel worthy. I thought of her every day, but I had been so eager to kill her, so ready to end her life before it began, that I felt myself to be unclean. How could I be a father to the beautiful child that I had hated so forcefully before she took her first breath? Seeing her would be both immensely gratifying and utterly humiliating. As beautiful and marvelous as I knew her to be, there was also still a part of me that harbored some resentment towards her, which only fed my guilt. Because of her, Bella had been forced to make a transition I had always hoped to be able to talk her out of.

I tried to imagine Bella as a vampire… her skin gone cold, the brown of her eyes changed to that of the monster. How much of Bella would be left, when she was no longer frail, or graceless? The defining characteristics of her would have been changed with the venom. Truly, her funeral would be just that for me.

**Bella POV**

When Carlisle told me that he had spoken to Edward, I felt a wave of relief wash over me. He had agreed to attend the memorial service that Carlisle would urge my parents to hold; with no body to bury, it would be hard for them to get the closure they needed without a ceremony.

I checked myself for any relief at seeing him again, and was shocked to find none. I only felt apprehension at the prospect, and anger that I would have to find a way to explain his presence to Renesmee. It was a conversation we'd never had, because I couldn't find the right words.

"Momma, what are you thinking about?" Renesmee was perched in my lap, mangling a Barbie doll and humming to herself; my blank stare must have tipped her off that I had dropped out of reality for a moment.

"Well, I was actually just thinking of how I was going to explain something very complicated to you." I looked deep into her eyes, and felt another blast of anger at Edward. _This is so not fair,_ I thought to myself.

"About Daddy?" As per usual, my perceptive child had plucked the words right from my mouth. She pressed her hand to my cheek, and I saw a flash of Edward, looking over Alice's shoulder and down into Renesmee's eyes. She must have seen him while I was burning, and I had never known.

"Yes, honey," I sighed. "About Daddy. How much do you know about him?" I was surprised that she seemed to know about him; I couldn't remember ever mentioning him in her presence. I tried never to speak of him, if possible.

"Aunt Alice says he's a jackass." Renesmee's blunt honesty surprised me, and I couldn't hold back a short, barking sort of laugh that mingled with Alice's tinkling one from above me in her room.

"Well, Aunt Alice shouldn't say those things," I said, knowing she could hear me. "'Jackass' isn't a nice word. If you keep talking like that, Grandma Esme will be very upset. You'll also start to sound like Uncle Emmett." I smiled as his name passed over my lips, thinking of the way the sun played on his black curls, the way that his face dimpled when he smiled… I shook my head, reminding my new, more easily distracted mind that there was business at hand. Important business. "Your Daddy is just a very confused, very easily upset person. When I was going to have you, we heard a scary story that the Mommies of babies like you couldn't live through having their babies. He was very scared, and he left because he didn't want to watch Momma hurt. He loves us both, very much," I almost choked on the words, but I forced them out for her benefit, "but he isn't going to live with us for a very long time. Maybe forever."

"Daddy's a scaredy-cat?" The innocence of her was so precious, it made me want to weep.

"Not a scaredy-cat, exactly. He just worries about us, all the time. It's not good for Daddy, or for us, for him to live with us." I hoped that the conversation was drawing to a close; I was already fighting the urge to grit my teeth.

"Okay. He's coming to see me soon. I heard Grandma and Grandpa talking about it. Is that why you wanted to talk to me?"

"Yes, baby. Momma just didn't want you to be surprised when he got here. You look very much like him, you know. His hair the exact same color of yours, too." Sticking to the things that couldn't be refuted, like Renesmee's resemblance to her father, seemed to be a good strategy.

"Don't worry, Momma. I won't tell him that he's a… what Aunt Alice said. Is his hair curly, like mine?" She seemed genuinely interested in him, and I realized that she was probably starving for information about him.

****

**Esme POV**

I listened to Bella discussing Edward with Renesmee, and felt a surge of pride in her. Despite the newborn's anger that must have been choking her throughout the conversation, she remained neutral, even complementary of Edward.

I missed my son, desperately. The first of my adopted children, we'd had a bond that was closer and more intimate than I had with anyone in my family, with the exception of my husband. I loved Edward, and mourned for him, but I knew that he had been led to his seclusion by his own poor choices. As much as I would have loved to be able to repair the severed ties of my family, I couldn't. I also found myself often thinking that Emmett and Bella were far better matched to one another than they had been with their previous mates. There was a joy in Emmett that was even greater than his natural happiness, in Bella's presence. With him, she was able to laugh and love in a way that was far less serious, though no less true. They joked and roughhoused in a way that I could never imagine her doing with Edward, or he with Rosalie, but it seemed like a deep part of her natural disposition. With Emmett, Bella was finally free of the oppressive dramatic tendencies that Edward was a slave to. Freed from the constant battle of his gloom, Bella was flourishing in Emmett's light, and the look in his eyes when they fell upon her made me want to weep with gratitude.

I could only hope that Edward would see their joy, and would not do anything to jeopardize the careful balance of our family dynamic. I could see the fear in Bella's eyes sometimes, when Emmett kissed her or they were being particularly affectionate; I knew she was afraid that we secretly disapproved, and nothing could be farther from the truth. I was overjoyed that the two of them had found something so strong. I also respected Emmett in a way that I never had before; I had never credited him with the ability to be so tender. With Rosalie, he had been accepting and aloof; he never allowed her temper to shake him, but he also never seemed to fully give himself over, the way he so readily did with Bella and Renesmee. Truly, the bond between the three of them was something to be treasured and guarded.

**Emmett POV**

I didn't want to be pissed off. Really. I was so happy with Bella, I couldn't even breathe right sometimes. Knowing that Edward was coming terrified me, even though I didn't want to admit it. It wasn't like I was insecure or anything… I knew Bella loved me. But I knew that she'd loved Edward first. Sometimes when she looked at Renesmee, it looked like Bella had been slapped in the face or something, and I could only figure that it was because the kid looked so much like him. Let me tell you, it was hard for me to deal with sometimes. I couldn't imagine what it had to be like for Bella.

I spent the day that we expected Edward to arrive with Renesmee, and I hated myself for being afraid that she was going to love him more than me. I mean, for Christ's sake, she was his _daughter._ She was supposed to love him more. But I had been there from day one, you know? Holding her, playing with her, teaching her how to swim and climb trees, how to watch football and play jokes on her mom.

That was another thing that was great. The three of us were like the Three Musketeers or something. Every morning, just before the sun rose, I would hear Renesmee climb out of her bed and start down the hall. Bella and I would jump apart real quick and get dressed, just in time for Renesmee to knock on the door to climb in bed with us. The first time she did it would have melted my heart, if it still worked right. She crawled right up in the bed and wrapped her tiny little arms around me, and just passed right out in my arms. Just like I was really her dad, or something. I guess it got to Bella too, because she just stretched out on her side and watched us until Renesmee woke up.

That day, we were at the little house by ourselves. Bella was over at the big house, getting the skinny on her faked death and all, while Renesmee and I played tea party. She made me put on a silly hat, and stick my pinky out while I drank pretend tea… I was just glad the kid didn't want me to wear a dress, because I have to say, if she'd asked, I probably would have done it.

So, we're sitting there when, out of nowhere, she drops a bomb on me. "Uncle Emmett, does my Daddy have to be my Daddy?" If it hadn't been for my super reflexes, I would have dropped that itty bitty teacup. Instead, I just sat it down really carefully.

"Well, yeah. I mean, it's a biological thing. You can't change that stuff. Why do you ask?" I really wasn't the one who needed to be talking to her about these things.

"I just wondered if _you_ could be my Daddy. You teach me things, and play with me. I love you." That did it. I grabbed her up and hugged her, not giving a shit if Edward heard the conversation in my head later. Hell, I hoped he would. I made a note to remember it later, when he was around.

"I love you too, Renesmee. More than anything in the whole wide world. I might not be your Daddy, but I love you just as much as I would if I were. You don't ever have to wonder about that." The mushy stuff was getting to me, so I headed off to the big house with her. She needed to talk to Bella or Esme, and I sure needed to talk to Carlisle.

**Edward POV**

When I arrived at the Ithaca house, my family was standing on the porch. Bella and Emmett's fingers were intertwined in such an intimate way that it made me want to wretch, but I reminded myself to keep my feelings hidden. Bella deserved whatever happiness she could find in the ruins I had left behind for her. The fact that my daughter was in his arms was salt in the wound, but I welcomed the pain. I deserved it, after everything I had put the two of them through. I had left them with no one but Emmett to defend them; I should have been grateful that he was so strong and capable.

Esme ran to me, taking me in her arms as she sobbed tearlessly. "Oh, Edward. My son, how I have missed you!' The agony on her face renewed the overpowering guilt in me, and I could not meet her eyes as I responded.

"I've missed you too, Esme. I've missed all of you, more than I could ever express." I lifted my eyes to look at Bella closely for the first time. She was almost unrecognizable to me… her hair seemed much darker, though I knew it was merely the effect of her white skin contrasting against it. All of the awkwardness and lack of grace that I had so adored was missing; the beauty before me was elegant in her stillness. Her slender body seemed almost fluid somehow, lithe and supple, though I knew that it would be hard as stone if I were to touch it.

The delicious smell that had played such a part in drawing me to her was gone, replaced with a sweet vampiric scent all her own, reminiscent of the fragrance she had carried before, but distinctly inedible. I missed the sound of her beating heart, and the blush that would have surely been spread across the planes of her perfect face if she were still human. The creature before me betrayed no emotion whatsoever, and she radiated a kind of strength that was off-putting.

"Edward." She said my dispassionately, and I knew that I had lost my Bella forever. "This is Renesmee. She's been looking forward to meeting you; she's been very curious about her father." The last word was spat with a thinly-veiled disgust that made me blanch, but I knew that I deserved her distaste. I stepped towards Emmett, and his thoughts made me wince.

_Yeah bro, she loves me. They both love me. And I'll fucking kill you myself if you do anything to hurt either of them._ There was a flash of a memory in his mind: wearing a fanciful hat and holding a miniscule china tea cup. _"Uncle Emmett, does my Daddy have to be my Daddy?"_ The thought made me want to scream, but I managed to stifle the expression of my unending pain.

"Renesmee," I began gently, "My name is Edward. I am your father. I'm sorry that I've been gone so long, and that I haven't had a chance to know you."

**Renesmee POV**

The man that was standing in the grass looked like me. He seemed really sad, and I felt sorry that he wasn't happy.

He reached out like he wanted to hold me, but I held on to Uncle Emmett really tight; I didn't want him to let me go. The man made a very sad face, but he put his arms down and made a funny noise in his throat.

"It's alright if you don't want me to hold you, Renesmee. You don't know me at all, and you're very smart to be wary of strangers." I was really sorry for making him look so upset, but I was a little bit mad at him because he had made Momma so sad when I was littler.

"Uncle Emmett taught me how to swim." I was very proud; Uncle Emmett said I was the best swimmer ever. I could even beat him in races and stuff.

"He did? That was very nice of him. I bet that was a lot of fun, wasn't it?" He was trying really hard not to look sad anymore, but he wasn't doing a good job.

"Yes, it was fun. I'm really fast. And I can jump really high, but Momma won't let me climb way up high in the big trees. She says I might fall down." The man laughed, and his eyes looked a little different.

"Your mother is a very, very smart lady. You should always listen to her."

"I do, but I don't have to because Aunt Alice can't see me like she can everybody else. If I did something bad and nobody saw, she wouldn't be able to tattle on me." Everybody started to laugh, and Aunt Alice tickled me a little.

Grandpa Carlisle walked closer to my Daddy, and hugged him. "Edward," he said, "we should discuss the plans for the ceremony, and the story that we will tell Renee and Charlie." Renee and Charlie were my Momma's Momma and Daddy, but I couldn't ever meet them because they didn't know about me. Momma said it was because we were all very special, and that regular people couldn't know our secrets.

Uncle Emmett bounced me up and down, and then threw me _way up high. _When he caught me, he started to tickle me and turned me upside down. We all went in the house, but Uncle Emmett took me to Nahuel. "Hey, Nahuel," he said. "I think you should play with Renesmee for a while. We've got to have a grown-up talk." Uncle Emmett winked at Nahuel, like I couldn't see it or something. I decided not to say anything because they probably didn't want me to hear them talking.

"Nahuel!" I yelled. I love my Nahuel, and his Aunt Huilen. They told the best stories of anybody else. Nahuel was like me, they called us "hybrids," but Nahuel's Momma died trying to get him out of her tummy. It made me sad.

He picked me up and put me on his back like he always did if we were going to run really far. "I wanna climb trees!" Climbing trees was my favorite, and Nahuel would take me up the really big ones if nobody was with us. He wasn't scared all the time like Momma and Uncle Emmett.

**Bella POV**

We all filed into the dining room, the standard procedure for family meetings. I felt a moment of anxiety when Edward moved to sit next to me, but he corrected himself quickly and sat on Alice's left.

"Edward," Carlisle began, "we have decided that we will fake a skiing accident at Song Mountain Resort. One of the staff members there is a vampire called Garrett. He was a nomad, and adhered to the traditional diet, but his adventurous spirit to try new things led him to our way of life as a challenge after we met. He will help us to falsify some evidence, so that we can say that Bella's body was never recovered. I do not think that she is prepared to resist the blood of the humans who would want to come to her funeral, nor do I think it humane to force her to be a witness to the grief of her family." His eyes softened when he mentioned Renee and Charlie, and I felt my throat tighten. I knew that my loss would wound my father most of all; he would truly be left alone in the world.

"I agree with your decision. I will make the necessary calls tomorrow, if we are prepared to do so. I think that, the sooner we can get this business concluded, the better." He looked truly grief-stricken, and I found myself wondering, not for the first time, if this funeral would be more than just a farce for Edward. Perhaps it was symbolic for him; after all, the girl that he loved was dead and in her grave.


	17. Chapter 17 Dust to Dust

_Chapter Seventeen - Dust to Dust_

**Carlisle POV**

I was grateful that I'd insisted upon finding a way for Bella to avoid attending her memorial service; the immense sorrow and grief was almost more than I could stand.

We explained the absence of Rosalie by saying that she was too distraught to attend; I didn't know how to gracefully explain that she was the daughter I had lost, not Bella.

Charlie seemed mostly numb, clutching at Sue Clearwater's arm. The tiny, dark woman looked at me with undisguised hate, and eyes full of questions. Billy Black sat in his wheelchair, looking horrified. I knew that they were aware of the truth, but when Billy looked up at me with a pointed stare, I nodded. They were already aware of us; if I could afford them a bit of relief, and a bit of honesty in this farce, I would.

The nod seemed to relieve Billy; perhaps he didn't hate us as much as he had before.

Renee clung to her husband, keening with grief and looking altogether delicate in her mourning blacks. I ached to comfort her, to tell her the truth, but I knew that it was not an option. It was truly better for her to think that her daughter was dead; any other knowledge would be a death sentence.

The full weight of all that the service implied sat heavily upon all of our shoulders, and our grief was not feigned. I grieved for Charlie, and for Renee, as did the rest of my family. Alice insisted that she stay by Charlie's other side, and though Sue recoiled from her, Charlie seemed to find comfort in her presence.

"You were always the best girlfriend that Bella had, Alice. Thank you so much for--" his words choked off, and he let out a barking sob as he fell into Alice's arms. "Oh God, Alice. She was the only child I will ever have, and she's gone. I'll never see my baby again!" The horror of the moment sunk into me fully, and I was overcome with guilt. Though Bella had made the only choice that was available to her, there was a part of me that silently wished that she had chosen Jacob Black.

Who was very conspicuously absent.

Angela Weber's father performed the ceremony, and his words were indicative of the palpable grief that permeated the room. "It was a painfully short time ago, that I stood before Bella and Edward, officiating over their wedding. It is with a very heavy heart that I lay to rest the memory of Edward's young bride, and my own daughter's good friend.

Bella was a very important part of the many lives that she touched, bringing a smile to the faces of all who knew her. On the dean's list at Dartmouth, with a husband that adored her, Bella's future was bright. She will be horribly missed, and I know that I will personally carry a hole in my heart for her all of the days of my life. I have faith that Bella has found peace on the other side of this veil, and that, one day, we will all see her again."

I was immensely grateful that I had decided to purchase Bella's place on the dean's list; if it was the only measure of comfort I could offer to Renee and Charlie, it was money well spent.

The expression on Edward's face was one that I knew I would always carry with me. Like a man on fire in the very belly of Hell, he looked for all the world like a man mourning the loss of his very young, very new bride. There was no doubt in my mind that Edward was being tortured by the poor decisions he had made.

**Bella POV**

I sat in the living room of the big house, holding a book in my hands that I wasn't reading. Renesmee was napping, and the house was quiet.

My family, both human and vampire, were attending my funeral.

Nahuel and Huilen had gone to hunt, probably in an effort to leave me alone with my thoughts. I wished that they hadn't; I couldn't get the image of a mourning Charlie and Renee out of my mind. I wondered if Jake had attended, and Billy. Part of me also wondered if Billy would crack under the pressure of seeing his best friend overcome, and tell the secret that both of our families guarded so closely. For the millionth time, I cursed the Volturi that would not allow me to remain in contact with my family. I missed them so deeply, it was like a wound in my chest that would not heal.

Because the ceremony had been held in Forks, I would be without Emmett and the rest of my family for three days, and because I had not been exposed to humans yet and did not know my level of control, I couldn't even pick them up from the airport. Feeling useless and sorrowful, I flung the book down on the couch next to me lightly, taking care not to use too much force. I began to pace around the room, wondering how to handle the grief I felt, and where to put it all.

I hurled myself to out the front door and into a defensive crouch as I heard the sound of someone approaching, hearing the animalistic snarl that tore from my lips.

"Easy, Bella. My name is Garrett. I'm a friend of Carlisle's." I looked at the handsome man standing before me, and my tense posture eased the slightest amount. Because he was still a stranger, I was not ready to relent completely. "I work at Song Mountain, did Carlisle tell you that? I came to keep you company; I know that you must be hurting, and being alone won't help." As the words fell from his mouth, I tensed again and whirled to face the other direction, uneasy about turning my back to him but feeling an instinctive need to see the new threat that was approaching. As the five figures stepped through a break in the trees, I relaxed completely. There was only one figure that I didn't recognize, and I assumed that she must be Irina from the way that she eyed me with speculation. A trilling laugh broke the silence of the still night, and Kate stepped forward.

As she stuck her hand out towards Garrett, I noticed the awestruck expression on his face. "My name is Kate. I am a… cousin of sorts, to the Cullens. I see that we must have had the same intentions; to keep Bella company through the time that her family would be away for her 'funeral.' For one with ties so close to her human family, we thought that this might be a difficult time for her." She turned to me and continued, "Bella, I hope that we're not intruding. I remember the pain of leaving my own human family behind, and I wanted to see if we could offer some comfort. Also, we were curious to meet this child that Edward spoke so highly of, and Irina has come to offer her apologies." She gave Irina a hard look, and the haughty blonde stepped forward.

"I am most heartily sorry that our family did not offer our assistance when we were needed. I have realized that Laurent was wrong to hunt you, and that he was in league with his old associates while he was promising me that he wasn't. I hope that you can forgive us for forsaking you and the rest of our extended family in a time of great need." She seemed sincere, but something in her demeanor called Rosalie to mind, and I knew that Irina and I would never be great friends.

"I understand, Irina. You only did what you thought was right. If Emmett were to do something like that, I would still probably take his side in the end. Love is funny like that." Oops. I wasn't sure if they knew about Emmett and I.

There was no need to worry. Apparently Edward had informed them of everything, because all I heard was a chorus of laughter. Kate embraced me as she spoke, "We have a cousin that couldn't accompany us here, named Raisa. She is also anxious to meet you, but we thought that, being a newborn, it would be easier to only spring one new face on you. " She turned to Garrett, and winked at him. "Some of us are more cautious with our necks when it comes to newborns than others."

* * * *

The Denali were all immediately taken with Renesmee, but none so much as Carmen. While the rest of us discussed the most casual topics, they huddled together on the couch. Impressed by her gift, Carmen urged her to keep sharing her memories.

"So, Bella, have you had much opportunity to use the shield?" Eleazar looked at me expectantly, as if I could understand his meaning.

"The, er, shield? I don't know what you mean, Eleazar." I bowed my head in embarrassment; was there something crucial to being a vampire that I didn't have, and my family hadn't told me about? How like them to be polite, to not bring it up…

"Your power. You have a formidable mental shield. I can't penetrate it at all. Can you extend it to cover others?" The curiosity on his face was exciting to me. I had a power?

"I don't know… I didn't know I had a power. My head was always sort of private. Neither Edward or Aro could read my thoughts, and Jane's power didn't work on me when I was still human. I suppose that my head is just quiet." Eleazar laughed, but there was a tinge of awe in it.

"Your power manifested that strongly as a human? Well, you should be able to do more with it since you've changed. Perhaps Kate will help you to work on it… I am curious to see if, with the proper training, you can extend it. It would be very useful if you could block other people from Aro and Jane."

"How can Kate help me?" I looked at her expectantly, with a great surge of hope. I had a power, and I could be useful in a fight!

"Well," she began, "I have a defensive skill. I can send a current over my skin that causes pain to anyone who touches me, should I choose it. Much like Jane's power, it affects the mind. You only _think_ that I'm hurting you; there is no real physiological cause for the pain." She placed her hand on my arm. "Can you feel that?" I shook my head, and she sat back, clearly impressed. "Close your eyes, and see if you can find the edges of your shield… The places where it clings to your mind." I did as she requested, and found that I could feel a tugging on the edges of my brain.

"I think I've found them." I said, doubtful. What if I didn't do it right?

"Garrett, come over here. Bella, can you see Garrett in your mind?" As she spoke his name, I saw something like the flame of a candle hovering on the periphery of my mind.

"Yes, I see him."

"Good. Now try to push the edges of your shield out to cover him." Suddenly, Garrett's knees buckled, and he collapsed into the floor. He looked up at Kate with a wonder that mingled with admiration, and I couldn't suppress a smile. It was plain to see that he was fascinated with her.

"Bella, I'm guessing you didn't get the shield around him?" She raised one eyebrow with a mischievous smile.

"You didn't give me a chance! It's hard to move the edges… they flex a little, but I can't get them to push out from me." I was bitterly disappointed in myself, though the logical part of me knew that I was unlikely to get the skill down on the first try.

"Bella," Eleazar soothed, "it's only to be expected that your shield is difficult to move. It's a defense mechanism, and it's designed to protect only you. You'll have to work at it for a while to get it to extend. Garrett," he turned to the blonde vampire, who was still rubbing his elbow where Kate had grabbed him, "are you willing to continue playing guinea pig?"

A light shone in Garrett's eyes; a born adventurer, he could not resist a challenge. Even if it was one whose success depended on a newborn vampire's ability to control her mind. "Sure. Bella is already far, far advanced for a newborn. It would not surprise me to see her find the key to her powers quickly. Look at the control she exhibits. She should have attacked me when I so thoughtlessly appeared unannounced, but she even gave me the opportunity to declare myself before she killed me," he chuckled. "I wouldn't be surprised, either, to find that she has an ability to resist human blood already. Perhaps, the key is proper planning. Carlisle tells me that you had more than a year to prepare yourself?"

"Yes, and I had a huge aversion to blood as a human. I passed out at the sight of it," I admitted, with a self-deprecating grin. "I'm not a normal vampire, I suppose."

"Well," Kate stated, "It's probably a good thing, in the case of our dietary restrictions, to be something other than normal."

****

By the time my family returned, I had learned to sporadically project my shield. Garrett walked around looking nervous most of the time, always on the defensive in case Kate decided to "practice" some more. I had to admit, his faith in me was comforting, even if I didn't deserve it most of the time.

When Carmen and Eleazar left to pick the family up from the airport, Kate and I sat on the front porch awaiting their return. Nahuel played with Renesmee in the front yard, some complicated game that she had cooked up involving rolling boulders bigger than her body around.

"Renesmee! You'd better take those to the forest! Grandma will skin me alive if you tear up the front lawn!" I chuckled to myself, thinking how much like Renee I sounded, until a flare of pain ran through me. _Renee._ God, how I missed her.

"You're a natural born mother, Bella." Kate smiled at me, perhaps sensing my melancholy moment. "Edward was right about you."

"Edward?" I looked up at her, puzzled. "What did he say?"

"Just that you were going to be a wonderful mother to Renesmee, and that she would have a perfect childhood, in his absence." The mention of Edward's lack of intentions to be a part of his daughter's life irritated me, and I thrust my chin out in my trademark gesture of stubbornness. "Bella, he didn't leave to hurt you. If you had wanted nothing more than to kill Renesmee throughout your pregnancy, wouldn't you feel an overwhelming guilt now? It's hard for him to look at her, to see her perfection, without thinking about that. If it hadn't been for your tenacity, she wouldn't exist, and Edward did everything he could to undermine you. Never underestimate the power of guilt; it's a very powerful and very motivating emotion."

I sat quietly, pondering her words. "You're right, guilt is a powerful motivator. I'm glad that he feels guilty; he should. I'm also glad that he left, because I have found something far different than what I had with him. I will love Edward until I die, but I will never be _in_ love with him again. I never realized that there was such a distinction, until I fell in love with Emmett. Everything about our relationship is different, when compared to mine with Edward. Emmett respects me, thinks that I am strong. Honestly, his opinion of my is unrealistically high; he believes that there is nothing that I can't do. He allows me to make the decisions that I think are best, fighting me when he disagrees, but always willing to compromise. With Edward, there was very little room for a differing opinion." Kate's laugh burst from her.

"You're right, Edward is the last creature on the planet to admit when he is wrong. There is a change that has taken place in you that seems to have nothing to do with your transition to our way of life; a strength that was not present when I met you just a few short months ago at your wedding. Perhaps it's a result of fighting so long and so hard against him for the life of your daughter, but that change has left you as an ill-fitting match for Edward. He is very much stuck in the era of his human life, and he needs a woman that's more submissive and quiet. I've tried to explain it to Tanya a million times; it's not that Edward doesn't find her attractive, it's that she's too stubborn, to strong willed and 'modern.' He will forever be a slave to his courtly manners and way of thinking. As a human, you were the eternal damsel in distress that he needed. Now, when you no longer depend on him for your very survival, things are strained between the two of you. I don't think it will be long until he recognizes that."

As she finished, I heard the car approaching. The doors were barely open when I hurtled down the short flight of steps and into Emmett's waiting arms.

**Emmett POV**

Man, I was so stoked to see Bella that I could barely sit still on the plane, or in the car. We were all pretty surprised to see Carmen and Eleazar show up, but I guess we shouldn't have been. Kate's maternal thing would never allow her to let Bella wander around an empty house, thinking about her human family mourning her.

She was sitting on the porch with Kate when we pulled up, and she flew off so fast I could barely see her. She landed on my chest at a thousand miles per hour, damn near knocking me off my feet. When she started kissing me, I think we both forgot about being decent for a second, because Carlisle started clearing his throat and Edward groaned like somebody was pulling his fingernails out with pliers.

"Emmett, I realize that you have fallen in love with my wife, but can you _please_ keep your hands to yourself in my presence?" Bella launched herself out of my embrace and straight at him, standing between the two of us with her finger in his face and her chin stuck out. When I saw that little chin, I knew she meant business.

"Edward Cullen! You left _me,_ remember? If I have found something with Emmett that you don't like, then it's your own fault! I'm sorry I can't be the right kind of simpering, needy woman for you anymore! God forbid you should be married to someone with any kind of _strength!_ God, Edward!" She didn't look like she was even halfway finished, but she stopped for a minute. "I don't want to do this where Renesmee can hear," she said in a quiet little voice.

"Carlisle and I will take her hunting. She can watch us, so that she'll be more prepared when the time comes for Emmett to teach her." Esme didn't make any bones about the way she emphasized my name, letting everybody know pretty clearly what side she was on when it came to Bella and I, and how much she wanted us to hash all that shit out.

"Bella," Edward groaned like the pansy he was, "please don't do this. Please, give us another chance. I can change, I swear. I love how strong you are now. I'm not the chauvinist that you seem to think I am; I'm only accustomed to protecting you. I can learn to be different, if you'll just give me some time." Bella took in a really sharp breath, and I felt my muscles tense.

I was playing the cool-as-a-cucumber routine, but I was sweating bullets on the inside. Was this the moment I'd been so afraid of? What if she chose him?

"We have a child together, love."

Bella's eyes started flashing, and it took everything I had not to laugh. _Totally the wrong thing to say, buddy._ I guess he heard me, because he looked at me for a fraction of a second before he turned his attention back to Bella.

Who was breathing like a human that just finished a five-minute mile. "You. Asshole. _We_ do not have a child together. _I_ have a child. You've seen her twice since the day she was born, you bastard! You just deserted us, like you always do, and you expect me to come crawling back to you, just because you're saying that you're _sorry_ now? I don't believe you! Emmett is the one who teaches her things, the one she runs to when she falls down or has a bad dream. She doesn't even _know_ you. She wouldn't even let you hold her when you showed up here, because you're a _stranger_ to her!"

Maybe because he couldn't tangle with her, he rushed at me. I jumped out of the way just in time, but he was coming right back at me. Bella was screaming and snarling at him, so I grabbed her to hold her back.

"Are you hiding behind my _wife,_ Emmett? Are you so afraid that you can't face me without her between us?" His eyes were full of "fuck-you," and it took everything I had not to let her go. I knew she could tear him apart, but I also knew she would regret it.

"No, you dumb fuck. I'm trying to keep her from killing you, because she'll wish she hadn't later." I pressed my lips to her ear as best I could with the way she was struggling, and I started whispering to her. "Bella, you'll kill him. Do you want that? Back off, babe. I know you're pissed, but you're going to be in a world of hurt if you kill him. Trust me on this one, okay?"

She went limp, and Edward started circling again. "That's right, Bella. Let us settle this."

_Fuck. _He could read my thoughts; I'd never been able to take him because of that advantage, and I knew he wasn't going to let it go now. He wanted me dead. All of a sudden, his head snapped up and he stopped circling. "How are you doing that?" he snarled.

I dropped my arms, confused as hell. "Doing what?"

"I can't hear you! Your mind has gone completely silent!"

I looked down at Bella, who had a triumphant smile on her face. "Go ahead, Emmett. Kill him. Kate taught me how to use the shield in my mind, to project it to cover other people. As long as I keep you covered, he can't hear you."

Edward looked down at the ground, his shoulders slumping. Then, classic fucking Edward, he started running. From the porch, I could hear Kate cheering and running at Bella. "You did it! I knew you could do it!"

Bella ran into her arms, and she took Kate down. They rolled on the grass, laughing at each other.


	18. Chapter 18 Trial By Fire

_Chapter Eighteen - Trial By Fire_

**Bella POV**

I was on the porch, where I seemed to spend much of my time. Renesmee and Emmett were wrestling in the front yard, where Emmett kept allowing Renesmee to pin him.

"For such a little thing," he grunted as she hit him at the knee, causing him to very theatrically pratfall, "you sure are tough. Go easy on me, Kiddo! I'm an old man, here!" He scooped her up and tossed her in the air, catching her and tickling her mercilessly on the downswing. I smiled at them broadly before looking back down to the journal I was writing in. Esme and Alice had been right, I'd found a lot of peace in writing.

The Denali had left the week before, after staying with us for three. Not surprisingly, Garrett had gone with them. The two of them were so well matched, it was unbelievable. She even let him get away with calling her "Katie."

"Bella?" I'd been so absorbed in my writing that I hadn't heard Alice approach. My guard had dropped considerably in the last couple of weeks; my temper less easily triggered. Carlisle said that I seemed to be speeding through the newborn phase, though my physical strength wasn't yet waning. I looked up at her, my eyes full of questions. "I have to talk to you about something."

_Uh-oh. This doesn't sound good._

"What's up, Alice?" I slid the red silk ribbon glued into the journal between pages to mark my place, and sat it on the floor of the porch at my feet.

"Well, I had a little vision, and I think it's time we try something out." I felt my body sag in relief; nothing bad was coming, or she wouldn't be so calm.

"What?" I asked, warily. Alice sometimes had high expectations for me.

"Okay, here goes. So, the mailbox is way down at the end of the driveway, and the mailman will be here in ten minutes. I saw that you don't hurt him and I think it's time for you to be exposed to humans because you're going to have to do it eventually." Her words came out in a rush, and I smiled at my sister's worry.

"What do you want me to do?"

"I think it would be a good idea for the two of us to meet him at the mailbox. I'm expecting a package, and I'll be there to hold you back if you go for his throat, which you won't. But you need to know that, because you're going to have to get on a plane eventually for Italy, and even though we're going to charter a private one for the trip, there'll still be a pilot and stuff. So you have to get used to humans. Besides, you really are a freaky kind of newborn. You don't freak out or anything the way you should. You're making Jasper question everything he thinks he knows. " She winked at me, and I drew in a nervous breath.

"Are you sure, Alice? I mean, really, _really_ sure?" Worry creased my face, and I couldn't help but be nervous, despite her reassurances.

"Completely. It'll go smoothly, and you'll be able to get out and about really soon if you get through this. Like I said, you're not normal." I raised and eyebrow, and she hurried to finish. "I mean, for a newborn. That's a good thing, Bella. Maybe because you were an anti-blood human or something. I don't know the hows or whys, I just know that it's going to work and you're going to be able to start school soon, if you want to. Which I hope you don't, because I'm just not in the mood for high school again. Maybe Esme will let us home school this time…" she mused, as she pressed a small plastic case of contact lenses into my hand. "Put those in. They're not as pretty as your brown was, but it was the best I could do. Your eyes would send him running for the hills."

"Well, let's get this show on the road, then," I said as I inserted the contacts. They irritated my eyes, and I could see the mesh-like pattern, but it strangely wasn't obstructing to my view. With Alice's promise to keep me from killing the mailman, I had to admit that I was a bit curious. What would it feel like?

****

It felt like I had swallowed a burning baton, like a circus performer. Like I had eaten glass coated in salt. Like I was literally on fire inside. Still, I managed to smile at the mailman and return his casual greeting.

"You ladies are pretty anxious to get this package," he said. He looked down at the label and raised an eyebrow, clearly curious. "Paris, eh? Well, here ya go." Handed the huge box to Alice, and she pretended to struggle under it's slight weight.

The man drove away, whole and unblemished. _I had resisted him!_ Triumphant, I smiled until my face wouldn't stretch any farther.

Every day after that, I met the mailman. He must have thought I was crazy, but I just couldn't help it. The knowledge that I was strong enough to be in the presence of a human was intoxicating.

****

"Just breathe, Bella. Breathe a lot, because when we get out of the car, you're not going to be able to." Alice and I were headed to the tiny grocery store on the outskirts of Ithaca. There were rarely more than a couple of people in it at a time, and she'd seen the trip going smoothly.

When the car stopped, I took the last deep breath I would take, and let it out. "Okay," Alice reminded me, "you're going to have to _look_ like you're breathing, so move your body around like you are. Don't forget to blink, and fidget around a bit. Basically, do things that feel silly. You'll look human."

I opened the car door and walked so slowly that it felt exaggerated, but Alice nodded at me encouragingly.

Of course, the woman at the counter spoke to us, and I let out the last bit of air I'd been reserving to respond to her polite "hello." We wandered the aisle, and Alice began selecting ingredients for a meal she was planning for Nahuel and Renesmee. As we walked to the register with our purchases, she looked at me with a look of real remorse. "I'm sorry," she mouthed.

"Hello, ladies. How are you two doing this evening?" The middle-aged woman reminded me of Ms. Cope, the receptionist at Forks High School, whose death I'd almost been responsible for when Edward and I were trapped in the small, warm office where she worked, the scent of my blood permeating the room.

"We're fine!" Alice trilled. She shot me a warning look, letting me know that the next response would be up to me.

"Dear, your hair is just gorgeous. How do you get it to be so shiny and healthy? Mine is always as dull as dishwater." I could tell the woman was genuinely curious, and I winced as I drew in a breath to answer her. The air that rushed into my throat was like kerosene on an open flame, and my reaction must have been visible, because she piped up before I could respond. "Oh, honey, do you have that sore throat that's going around? My son--" _she has a son,_ I told myself. _She is not food. She has a family,_ "had that last week. Here, we've got some of this tea. He swore by it. Let me go get it."

"Thank you so much," I managed to choke out. "It really is terrible."

After we completed the purchases and got into the car, Alice squealed with delight. I couldn't help joining her; I was getting better every day.

****

After the successful trip to the grocery store, I found myself volunteering to leave more and more often. The burn of venom in my throat became a welcome pain; as long as I felt it, no one had died to slake my thirst. Alice always drove, and was always eager to leave. Especially since we started driving into Manhattan on overcast days for her to shop. My closet in the little house began to bulge, but I had to admit that Alice's enthusiasm for clothes was wearing off on me.

"You know," she said one day, as we were heading home, "you're doing really well. Well enough that we should probably plan your trip to Italy soon."

"I know. I'm not ready yet." I cringed away from the idea of being face to face with Aro again, though I knew it was a necessary evil. "I don't want to charter a private jet. I want to go on a regular flight. I can handle it, " I said, with confidence. My control was surprising to me, but I never questioned it. It was painful, but nowhere near impossible; I knew that it drove Jasper nearly insane. He'd been questioning a lot about himself since I'd been turned.

"If you're sure. Carlisle will be with you, and I have a plan that will work," she said, no trace of doubt in her voice. "We don't need the Volturi knowing about Renesmee, so you're going to shield Carlisle's mind the whole time you're in the country. Carlisle will lie, telling them that the shield is involuntary and impenetrable. We know that it works over quite a distance, and the Volturi will not be interested enough to separate you; they're only interested in the fact that you have been changed. When Aro touches Carlisle, he'll hear nothing. There will be no need to worry about Aro trying to 'collect' Renesmee."

I began to sob with relief. My biggest fear about the trip had been the inevitability of exposing my daughter. "Oh, thank God," I murmured, over and over.

I was almost in control of myself when we pulled into the driveway, and I felt my breath leave my body in another rush. Emmett was in the driveway, standing next to my old truck.

Well, not _exactly_ my old truck. This one had been restored to all of it's former glory, glossy in the evening light. I hurled myself from Alice's Porsche, and into his arms. "Oh, Emmett. I love you, I love you, I love you!"

****

That night, Emmett and I were in my truck. Renesmee was sleeping at in Carlisle and Esme's room; I hoped that we would be back by noon the next day.

We were on our way to the small airport to get on a tiny Cessna headed for Forks. I couldn't explain it, but I felt an overwhelming desire to see the place where my life had taken such a dramatic turn.

When we arrived, I headed straight for Charlie's house, and to Emmett's credit, he only followed me. He never questioned me as Edward would have; he trusted me and my judgment. I sprung into one of the taller trees behind Charlie's house, and I spend the whole night there, just watching. Emmett stood next to me on an adjoining branch, and he never spoke a word.

****

The plans for my trip to Italy were finalized quickly. Carlisle and I boarded the plane, and I held my breath through much of the flight. Though the pain was excruciating, I lasted through the flight without so much as a flinch. Frequently, he reached over to pat my hand, looking at me with a deep-seated paternal pride. I sat in the window seat, and the place next to Carlisle was empty, due to his foresight. He'd bought three tickets, just so the third seat could be vacant. In front of me was a young woman, a very harassed looking mother of a toddler that fussed throughout the trip. I kept my eyes on the child, thinking of Renesmee and how much that child was relying on me to control my newborn's thirst.

The rental car that took us to Volterra was one of those tiny European coupes, quite a departure from the Mercedes that Carlisle normally drove, but he handled it with and unsurprising finesse. We spent the short drive going over the plan for keeping the Volturi in the dark, though we both knew it implicitly.

"You will have to maintain your shield until we board the plane back to the States. Will it tire you out too much to do so?" He spoke with great concern, both for my ability and my wellbeing.

"No," I said carefully. "I've been experimenting with it, and now that I've really gotten a handle on how it works, it looks like I can keep it up indefinitely. It doesn't hurt that Alice has already seen it work; it really boosts my confidence."

I double-checked, though I knew Carlisle was under the cover of my mind's protective umbrella, and we stepped out of the car. As we approached the ornate doors that led to the street-level entrance of the Volturi tower, I swallowed hard. Carlisle opened the door, and we headed into the over-the-top splendor of the lobby. I followed him as he made his way through the labyrinthine passages, until we came to the underground office where the human Gianna held dominion. I wondered idly how long it would be before they made their decision to either kill or keep her.

"Hello, Gianna," Carlisle intoned soothingly. "My name is Dr. Carlisle Cullen. This is my daughter-in-law, Isabella. We have a standing appointment with Aro, Caius, and Marcus."

"Of course, Dr. Cullen." Gianna smiled brightly, all business. "We've been expecting you for some time now." She led us into a room that I hadn't been in the last time that I'd been there; a large room of white marble, with a balcony. I immediately recognized it as the room from the Solimena painting that Carlisle kept in his office.

"Ah, Bella!" Aro breathed, "I am so pleased to see you! Immortality suits you perfectly! Indeed, it seems as if you were designed for this life." He pressed his hand to mine, and his smile wavered for a moment. "I see that your curiously private mind remains so."

"Yes, Aro," Carlisle interrupted. "Actually, Bella's shield has intensified with her change. She now unconsciously shields those that she has an emotional bond with. We have not learned yet how it works, so she is incapable of pulling it back. I'm afraid that you will not be able to hear my thoughts either."

Aro's eyes lit up with undisguised joy. "Truly, you are a marvel, Isabella. I'm sorry, you prefer to be called 'Bella,' do you not?"

"Yes." I said casually. I silently sent up a prayer of thanks that, as a vampire, I was a more adept liar.

"I feel that I must offer you a place among us, young Bella." His milky eyes glittered shrewdly, as if he realized I would not accept his offer.

"No thank you, Aro. I'm perfectly content where I am, at the moment. Should anything change, you'll be the first to know." Clearly delighted with my cheeky answer, he giggled in a way that was unsettling and off-putting.

"Certainly, certainly. You need only to contact us, should your opinion change. A power such as yours could prove enormously useful, in that event." He clasped his hands together under his chin, and drew in a long breath. "Well, dear ones. If you have nothing else to discuss, I believe that our business here is concluded. I am so grateful that you made the choice of immortality, Bella. It truly would have been a waste to dispose of you, though your blood was quite… intoxicating."

"Yes, Aro. Our business here is concluded. Thank you for your time, and I look forward to the next time that we can visit you here." His unspoken plea was apparent: _don't come to us, we'll come to you._

"Not as much as I do. I hope that, next time, you will bring the rest of your family. We'll arrange a real celebration."

Carlisle and I were silent for the drive back to the airport; when we finally boarded the plane and took off, I allowed myself a sigh of relief, though it caused the inferno in my throat to explode. I grasped Carlisle's hand in relief. _I am heading home, _I thought. _Not to a pair of coordinates on a map, but to a pair of arms that were built for me._ I let my head fall against the headrest, and I thought of Emmett.


	19. Chapter 19 The Aftermath of a Betrayal

_Chapter Nineteen - The Aftermath of a Betrayal_

**Emmett POV**

The divorce papers came in on a Tuesday. Bella had kept up her funny little habit of meeting the mailman, and she came back with an envelope clutched into her hand like she was drowning and it could float.

"What's that, Half-pint?' I had a pretty good idea, but I didn't see any need in spoiling it for her.

"These? Oh, nothing. Just _signed divorce papers_!" She did a funny little happy dance, and I thought to myself that becoming a vampire had made her more graceful, but no less goofy. Until I started doing the happy dance with her. When Esme came down the stairs, she was looking at us like we had lost our minds.

"What is going on here?" she laughed. "Did Alice win the lottery again?"

"Close," Bella shouted, hopping with excitement. "They're signed!"

Right then, Alice came flying down the stairs like a pyschotic version of Tinkerbell, hollering about dresses.

"NO!" Bella looked at her like she was trying to force barbed wire down her throat. "I am _not_ wearing another frilly dress this time! I want something simple, and I don't care what else you do. I'm just not wearing something that looks like I should be standing on top of a wedding ca--" she looked at me and swallowed hard. "I mean, if he… you know, wants to. Ah, hell. Damn it, Alice!" She stomped off to the little house, and Esme was so tickled that she didn't even jump Bella's ass for her language.

"Alice," I growled, trying to look _really_ pissed off, "what did you do?" I guess it worked, because she started backing up, with her little hands raised like she was talking to the cops.

"Now, Emmett, try to relax. I just saw that she got the papers, and I figured… well," she took a deep breath, and I knew one of her Alice-is-in-some-shit rants was coming "I knew that you were going to want to marry her and that she would want to marry you and I just wanted to help and now she's mad at me because I started this whole conversation and you haven't even asked her! Now she thinks that you're not going to because I didn't give you the chance, and I don't know how to keep my mouth shut!" She sort of collapsed into the chair that she'd backed into, her head in her hands. She looked totally worn out, and I figured that even a vampire would have to be tired after a sentence that long.

"Alice, I'm not mad." I wiggled my eyebrows, letting her know that I'd been playing her all along. It wasn't easy to fool a psychic, but it sure was fulfilling as shit when it worked.

**Bella POV**

I was in my study, staring at the desk when Emmett walked in.

"Hey, babe. You cooled off yet?" He had a big grin on his face, so I relaxed a little. He couldn't be too mad at my presumptions if he were showing me the special smile he saved just for me.

"I'm fine. I'm sorry, I guess I got carried away. You know Alice, she brings out the bridezilla in me. I just didn't want her running off and picking out some couture gown, I didn't even think that maybe you wouldn't want to get married. I mean, you've done it so many times…" I trailed off, not knowing what to say next. I could be _really_ smooth and bring up his dead first wife, really put the icing on the cake, so to speak.

"Bella, shh. Seriously. I don't care if you want to get married in the Sistine Chapel, I'm down for whatever. If you never want to get married, that's okay with me, too. I've gotta say, I'm a little surprised that you even entertained the idea, after the fuss you kicked up about having to get married the first time." He looked a little confused, but mostly proud. "It must be my mad skills, right?" He snorted with laughter, and I snickered a bit myself before answering him.

"Emmett, I would marry you tomorrow if you asked me too. I know that you're never going to leave me, and that I'm never going to want you to. We were made to be together. We had a lot of stumbling blocks thrown between us, but I am grateful for each and every one. I love you." My voice started to shake mid-way through my speech, but I never broke from his gaze.

"Well then, let's get married babe. We'll go pick out rings whenever you're ready. I didn't pick one out, because I didn't know if you even wanted to be married again. You have to admit, Alice pretty much had to drag you, kicking and screaming down the aisle last time. You'll have to forgive me if I'm a little unprepared. He winked, and pulled me close to him. I lost myself in the kiss, forgetting what I had been so upset about…

* * * *

**Jacob POV**

Bella had been gone for about a year when I met Naomi.

That first year was rough; the pack couldn't deal with me, Billy couldn't deal with me... Hell, _I_ couldn't deal with me. I was pretty much out of my mind for the first couple of months; I went wolf and spent most of my time somewhere in Canada, pretty close to where I was before she got married.

When Embry took down that fucking blonde, it helped some, but I knew that probably just meant that_ it_ had happened; that blonde _hated_ Bella, and really didn't want her to be turned. It killed me to know that I had something in common with the leech that wanted to kill Charlie, but we did share that. Neither of us wanted Bella to be turned into a monster.

Maybe six months after the blonde got what was coming to her, I started wandering back towards La Push. In the end, the only thing that got me to go back was Sam reminding me that Billy wasn't getting any younger. I really would have felt like shit if something happened to him while I was off grieving for a girl that picked somebody else, so I headed back. I spent a lot of time at Charlie's house, especially after he got the news that Bella had been lost in a "skiing accident." Yeah, right.

For a while, I thought Charlie was going to waste away himself. Even after the memorial service that I refused to go to (I told Charlie that I couldn't handle it, he said he understood and didn't expect me to show up if it was too much for me) he wandered around like he wasn't really sure where he was going or what he was doing. If it hadn't been for Sue, Charlie probably would have died, and gotten a hell of a disappointment when Bella wasn't hanging out at the Pearly Gates to meet him.

I used to sit in her room, looking at the things she'd left behind for hours. I don't know how Charlie put up with it, but he never said anything. I guess he knew I was just as close to the edge as he was.

The pack was the only thing that kept me sane, even though they couldn't say the same thing about me; I _drove_ them insane. When I knew for sure that she was gone, I really threw myself into hunting bloodsuckers. I halfway hoped that one would take me down so I wouldn't have to live with the pain anymore, but none of them ever did. Actually, we didn't get too much traffic after the Cullens left and we offed the blonde.

So, one night I was driving down the highway and I saw a littl e vintage VW Cabriolet on the side of the road, in the pouring rain with it's flashers on. I figured I'd stop because I knew VW's so well after rebuilding the Rabbit. I never expected what I found, that's for sure.

She was standing in the rain, staring at her flat tire. She had the jack out and a tire iron in her hand, but she just kept looking at them. I figured she didn't know how to change a tire, so I walked up to help her. When she turned to look at me, everything I had ever felt, every tear I'd cried for Bella seemed like a distant memory, but just for a second. There was a part of me that knew right away what had happened, and I was kinda pissed about it, to tell the truth. I had never wanted to imprint; to me it seemed like just another way of not having all of your choices in life ripped out of your fucking hands. After a few minutes, I didn't even care about making choices; I just wanted to know her.

I changed her tire, and tried to keep my sanity as she drove away with my phone number in her pocket. When she called three days later, I took her straight to Emily. I figured the imprinting thing would be easier for her to deal with if it came from somebody who'd dealt with it. Sam paced with me in the backyard while they talked, and I knew everything was going to be okay when she walked out the back door. She hugged me, real reassuring, and I just... knew.

After Charlie and Sue finally got hitched, I used to take her over there a lot. Seth had moved into Bella's old room, and I knew it was hard for Charlie, but he never said a word. Anyway, Naomi and I spent a lot of time there. Not every time, but sometimes when I pulled in the driveway, I thought I could catch a whiff of leech in the trees behind the house; the big guy that ran with the Cullens and one that I didn't recognize. Something about the other one smelled a little familiar, but too sweet and too strong. I couldn't help wondering if it was Bella, but I tried to shut those thoughts down as soon as they came; I loved Naomi, and I was happier. Still, sometimes when the nights were long or I went down to First Beach, I wondered about Bella... how she was, if her leech was treating her well.

The house they lived in was shut up. I never even caught a trail around it, so I eventually stopped checking. I did the only thing I could do: I went on with my life.

Naomi and I got married three months after we met; she was pregnant with Sarah, but we didn't know yet. After Will was born, I stopped phasing and we were a normal couple for the most part. We fought sometimes, but it didn't take us long to make up. The kids got on my nerves, but I wouldn't have traded them for anything.

I remembered what I'd said to Bella, about taking her if she didn't stink too bad. Even with the imprinting, I knew that, deep down, I'd meant that. I loved Naomi. I'd _imprinted,_ for fuck's sake. But sometimes late at night, when everybody in the house was asleep, I wished that Bella would come back. Even as a leech.

**The Epilogue: Bella POV**

I never completely abandoned my memories of my human life; the visit to Forks with Emmett was not my last, though I never revealed myself. I hoped that the rain would wash away my scent, and I was always careful to stay downwind of the house, just in case.

There were things about Emmett that sometimes brought Jake to mind... His size, the joy that was such an inextricable part of him, the vital masculinity. His boyish sense of humor and bravado... Then there were times that he reminded me of Edward, with his golden eyes and white skin. Apart from the rest of the family, I came to know a quiet, pensive side of him that I had not credited him with at first, a side of him that was thoughtful and intelligent, just like Edward. Though he had characteristics that reminded me of the two great loves of my human life, he was still wholly and completely _Emmett._ Thoroughly himself and comfortable in his own skin, he brought out a kind of happiness in me I didn't know I could feel. I laughed with Emmett in a way I had never been able to laugh with Edward. I don't know how much of my growing up was due to my change, and how much could be attributed to the simple passing of time, but I learned that the insecure teenage girl I used to be was completely and utterly wrong, on so many counts. Just because Edward was my first love, did not mean that he was meant to be the strongest of my existence. How many people can truly say that they're still with the first person that ever touched their heart? By holding myself to that immovable logic, I had hurt Jacob so deeply that it still sang in me sometimes. But I have been reconciled with the choices I made, because they've led me to a wonderful life with Emmett; a love full of laughter and based on mutual respect and admiration. With Emmett, I have never felt like I was less than he is, or that we were inequally matched. We were strong and beautiful together.

Renesmee adored him beyond reason, and every new accomplishment or bit of knowledge was an occasion for the two of them to celebrate.

After Charlie and Sue married, I would sometimes go back to visit. From the a high branch in the woods of the backyard, I watched the lives of the humans I had loved unfold.

I hoped that my occasional spying wouldn't be enough to cause a new generation of Quileute wolves; I wanted the pack's decendents to be free from the worry of battle, and the loss of will that accompanied imprinting. The rest of my family agreed wth me, and we never settled in Forks again.

I also never spoke to Jacob again. I thought of him every day, and occasionally saw him when I hid in the trees behind Charlie's house. At first, he looked completely broken, and haunted, but as time passed he began to stand up straighter and to resemble my Jacob more. When I saw him drive up with a small, dark haired girl, I rejoiced that Jacob had finally found love. I often saw them walking up the driveway together, and my cold, still heart sang when I recognized the thickening of her middle and the glow in her cheeks. I toyed with the idea of sending him a letter, or calling to let him know that I hadn't actually died in the fabricated skiing accident, but in the end, I didn't. I decided to be as selfless as Edward always insisted I was, and to let him heal in any way that he could. Knowing that I had changed was sure to be more than he could bear, even though the logical part of me knew that he was already completely aware of that fact. I hoped that his new love was worthy of him, and that he would find as much joy in being a parent as I had.

Edward visited on occasion, taking as much joy in his daughter as his guilt would allow. He eventually forgave me, but was never able to completely smother his bitterness towards Emmett, whom he accused of taking advantage of my weakness and dependence on his strength. He never credited me with any strength of my own, but he did meet a "cousin" of Tanya's when he was visiting Denali. Quiet and shy, Raisa was the submissive mate that Edward had always needed. Although we never lived together as a family, we were all able to be civil, at first for Renesmee's sake, then later out of a sort of mutual respect.

In a fit of mortification, Nahuel explained to us one night that his sisters all had menstrual cycles when they reached maturity, thus insuring that they could also have children. He claimed to have only told me so that I could be prepared when the day came, I often found myself wondering about his feelings for her; as the only female of his species that was not related to him by blood, it was a logical conclusion. I decided to cross that bridge when it came, but I was much more cautious about leaving them alone together when she began to grow into a young woman.

The wedding was a small one, with Garrett of the Denali clan officiating and Carlisle giving me away. I felt no compunction about this wedding, which led me to understand that the first one had been a mistake, albeit one that was worth every second because it gifted me with Renesmee.

We wrote our own vows, and Emmett surprised everyone but me with his choice of words.

"Bella, I won't make you a lot of unlikely promises. I can't bring you any celestial bodies, should you decide that you want them. It's exceedingly likely that I will, at some point, disappoint you somehow or make you angry. Just like you will somehow disappoint me and make me angry. I don't have such an unrealistic idea of us that I believe that there will never be an argument, or hurt feelings. I can, however, say without doubt that I will always do everything in my power to make you happy. I will fight for you, should it become necessary; I will take care of you should you ever find yourself hurt or unwell. I will keep your secrets and your heart safe.

In my life, I've burned a lot of bridges. Now, I find myself feeling grateful for the fact that there are rivers and oceans and planets worth of change that I can't go back across; all of those one-way bridges led me here, to the place where I found you holding all of my hopes suspended from the tips of your fingers. I have come a long way to find you, and I never want to go back."

With a strangled voice and a surplus of venom stinging my joyous eyes, I answered him.

"Emmett, I know that this road we're on is bound to be difficult sometimes. Like anything else, it will come with it's share of pain and disappointments, but I am willing to weather them gratefully if, in the end, I have you by my side. There are things that a person must be taught, and there are things that come easily, with no instruction necessary. Effortlessly..._instinctual._ I have always followed my instincts, sometimes to my own detriment. Suddenly, all of those mistakes and missteps seem like a prerequisite. Like maybe they were essential, and they were leading me here to the foot of this mountain. Without those moments, I would never be the person that I am. This woman I have become is worthy of you in a way that I never would have been, even a year and a half ago. Because of the pain that I've unintentionally inflicted upon myself, I am able to treasure you all the more. It's both overwhelming and slightly amusing to realize that all of this is a result of an impulsive decision. More accurately, the result of a hundred impulsive decisions... but I love you more than I have ever loved anything in my existence, and I am proud to share that existence with you."

* * *

**Author's Note:** _...and, the end. If there's enough interest, I may write a sequel; I have a few ideas for one. I would like to thank each and every person who has read this story, especially those that have left reviews. Your kind words are the reason that I finished._

So, any interest in the sequel?


	20. A Note and a Promise

**Author's Note--**

_Thank you all for all of the reviews, and all the love. I can't tell you how much it means to me._

_I'm kicking the sequel around in my head, but there are a couple of other stories in there too. I don't know what will come first, so just in case I put out one of the others first, I wanted to let you all know that I haven't forgotten the rest of Broken Dawn. _


	21. Just wanted to let everyone know

I thought I was finished. Really, I did.

But this little two shot kept kicking around in my head, screaming to be let out, so I had no choice. There is now a two shot companion to Broken Dawn, called Solstice. It's not the sequel, because I'm still working on that. It's just a little bit of the story that I couldn't leave out any longer.


End file.
